I NEED a reassessment

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I've been waiting 8 years for a reassessment now. It seems once you have got your diagnosis they just won't allocate funds to you because it's better spent diagnosing kids. I'm at the end of my tether with them. They don't understand how badly the diagnosis has messed me up, I'm slowly going insane, not as in the saying, I mean I am actually going mental. I want my life back!! !! I want my self-esteem back, I want my confidence back, I want my social skills back, I want to be able to talk in groups again, I want to be taken seriously again, I want to pass medicals again, I want to be allowed to do the things I want to do instead of watching my friends do them, I want back everything they have taken from me. I am about to drop off the suicidal cliff. Some people must know the next step in getting them to give me a reassessment, especially parents who fight like mad to get my seemingly much sought after diagnosis of aspergers. Is there someone higher up in the NHS than a doctor I can contact for referral? Can I pester an MP? It really is to that point where I'm willing to go any route possible.

If you don't think you have it, just tell yourself you don't and move on. You don't have to tell people you have it. I don't unless there is a reason for it.

I agree with littlelily, why would a label prevent you from doing the things you want to do? To my knowledge all it affects is your ability to get certain services and maybe disability. Why is it so vital that a professional take away the label before you can be neurotypical? And why would taking away the label suddenly enable you to do things you can't do at the moment?

You need to start by talking to a GP. If you used to have all those things and lost them recently, that's likely a sign of depression or worse, not an ASD.

Also I agree with those who pointed out there is no reason you need to let a medical record hold you back, or share what you're convinced is a misdiagnosis with anyone.

Really don't understand why you need a reassessment. At least you were lucky enough to get an assessment in the first place.

Edited for formatting issues

OP explained in another thread.

http://www.wrongplanet.net/postp5066482 ... t=#5066482

In many places in the world people who have an official Aspie diagnosis on their medical record are prevented from doing many jobs and even from driving. This is simply an outright disqualification for all Aspies. So in many parts of the world an official diagnosis can ruin your life.

A few have speculated I went through a personality change that wasn't related to AS but perhaps depression or psychosis or whatever. I never went through any change in personality or suffered any psychiatric condition. Well at least not in the way you're talking about anyway, I did go from normal to practically a social mute due to being told everything I did socially was wrong (not from peers, from professionals who never saw me socialize) and from me questioning my self all the time. It's the same as would happen if you told someone they had a terminal illness with months to live, I doubt they would be living the same life style after that diagnosis whether they were terminally ill or not.

I don't think I'm in denial. I'd like to think as a physics grad that I can think in an objective manner. I have gone over my assessment many times in those years and even when trying to be generous in answering the criteria I cannot seem to fit my self into it. The entire assessment notes are more or less a fabrication. They took something that could be seen in the way they wanted to see it and made it fit. For example, in order to satisfy "(III) The disturbance causes clinically significant impairments in social, occupational, or other important areas of functioning", they used the fact that I stopped attending school and decided to see that as me withdrawing from social interactions. In actual fact I never withdrew to anywhere, I was skipping classes to be with my mates, who were also skipping classes; socializing is just more fun than classes. There is also the fact that the vast majority of the information used to assess me came from my mother, who I'm sorry to say, is barely intellectually functional. It says in my assessment report that my mother feels I am psychotic and need to be sectioned. I later questioned her on what that was and it turns out it was just some word she once heard in a film and thought it means "generally eccentric". She is not intellectually able to process thoughts correctly which results in her being able to make up something in her head and believe it to be true. Going off on a tangent a little but it is worth it to show how her mind works. She once tried to win a debate with me about how advanced alien life forms might be by saying "have you seen their technology?". Of course I haven't and neither has she except in films, but shes not able to distinguish between a movie studio scene and reality. This is where I believe the assessment went wrong for the most part. When asked a specific question by the doctor, rather than answer it she will skew something to fit the question, fail to recognize the error in her thought process, switch its status to true and give the doctor that answer oblivious to the fact it has been fabricated.

I believe the rest of the criteria was met through purely circumstantial chance. For example I can remember looking at the floor a lot in the assessment. This was likely to be taken as poor eye contact. I have never had a problem with eye contact, the entire reason I did in the assessment was because I was there on essentially a lie. I would use the assessments as an excuse to get out of things, such as telling my headmaster I wouldn't be able to come into school after my assessment appointments because I'm mad. I knew I wasn't mad and didn't need to be wasting NHS money on pointless appointments. So what was me just showing guilt was taken as poor eye contact. One question used to satisfy "(C) a lack of spontaneous seeking to share enjoyment, interest or achievements with other people" was whether I enjoyed board games as a child. Of course I didn't, I was a 90's kid, I was way to busy kicking my friends butt on street fighter on the SEGA mega drive console. "(C) stereotyped and repetitive motor mannerisms" was satisfied by the fact I tap out drum beats a lot. I have NEVER seen another drummer, autistic or not, who didn't tap like his life depended on it. I don't have to tap, I can just not do so, its not a problem.

When I say I "lost social skills" I mean I'm out of practice. I still have them, I'm just no good at using them any more because I'm afraid to use them in case their wrong. I'm also afraid to use my facial expressions and vocal tone for the same reason. I never had these problems before my diagnosis, I developed them about 2 years afterwards when I started to develop my social anxiety. These problems go away around people I know.

I'm also not saying that my symptoms "disappeared". I don't believe they were ever there in the first place. Noetic pointed out I could have a "meltdown" in the air and this is the issue barring me from piloting. I'm not going to pretend I know what a meltdown is, I know its something to do with over stimulation, but I cant really understand why it happens without experiencing it.

Just as a mark of validation, since practically everyone who has ever commentated on my thoughts of my misdiagnosis has said "are you sure?", both of my GP's, my social worker and autism behavior specialist agree I do not have aspergers. I'm going to go see my GP tomorrow and explain the mental breakdown I'm suffering over this and ask to see a psychiatrist. Maybe the psychiatrist will be able to push through a referral when he sees how badly my mental health has declined over it.