Newtown incident making my neighbors scared of me!

Post Reply New Topic

My sister and I, both aspies, were horrified about the Newtown shooting. We were saddened to learn that the shooter had Asperger's, for we knew that it would color the public's view of other aspies. His rampage had nothing to do with his Asperger's, but that's something others don't get. We recently had a problem with our neighbor. He was revving his motocycle for 6 hours straight until we finally went across the street and asked him when he'd be done. Before we even began to seoak, he began taunting us and saying "Bye bye! If you don't like it leave!" This same man has been taunting us since we were 13. He called us f***ing little brats on our 13th birthday after we asked him to turn down his radio. This coming from a 45 year old man is really traumatizing. Anyway, the man's mother, with whom he still lives, called up our dad and said she did not want us ever ti come onto their property again. This call happened to come the day after the shooting. The neighbors know we have Asperger's. The neighbor's mom said she was scared of us! Ha! We're two spindly 23 year old girls who can hardly loft our 20 pound cat. Now that the holidays are here and we have a ton of gatherings to go to, we are hoping we won't receive the same prejudice from family members. Aspies are not scary or dangerous! Has anyone else been treated like a dangerous character? It makes us feel like lepers!

Nope. I don't tell anyone I have it.

Maybe the old woman will move, now that she fears you, and take her son with her.

Just for the record, it hasn't even been confirmed that the shooter had Aspergers.

Agreed with Jelly Cat. This is so horrible. This won't reduce the killings, but make someone else break. They don't need to have autism, any other mental disorder or illness. They just need to be rejected and bullied and made to feel like they are worthless. I wrote a blog post about this in my sig.

That's one of the great things about living in secrecy. I don't make a habit of exploiting my personality to everyone, therefore they won't judge me based on other people's actions.

Not everyone likes to disappear in their little hidey-hole, though, which is fair enough. But if you receive so much slack over being honest, that's when I've learned to shut my mouth and carry on with my life.

If the guy is revving his engine for 6 hours straight (something I'm guessing is a little exaggerated), call noise control or the police and let them deal with it. Same with any other spiteful or threatening behavior.

Another option is to talk to another neighbor, matter-of-factly ask this other neighbor if the noise is a problem, ask that neighbor if they could talk to the man. This is a less abrupt option than the police, which still remains a card to play.

There's a business saying, MIWJ meaning Minimize Interaction With Jerk. The whole thing sounds bad and scary, that the guy would swear at thirteen year olds. That the mother would call up and go all serious. She does have the right to have people stay off the property even if she's as mistaken as she can be. (and NTs unlikely to remember earlier profanity)

So, overall, other neighbor first option (if that feels promising), then police as backup card to play.

Last edited by AardvarkGoodSwimmer on 21 Dec 2012, 10:24 pm, edited 1 time in total.

There is a silver lining here; now that the loud people are afraid of what they don't know, this is a good time to convey to them that loud sounds are triggers for meltdowns. Fear of an unleashed episode should help keep them in line

I love this. My brother is into business. I wonder if he uses this saying?

I don't just go out and tell strangers but I never cared to hide my symptoms, particularly stimming as it is a stress reliever. But now I don't want people to even try to guess it.
I'm in Australia though and my area is an upbeat part of town where the artistic community are more open minded. We are all so different here. There is no average.

I'm not sure about other areas though.

Heh, I had a neighbor that was out there and lived in his mother's property.

He got so many complaints from the other neighbors, I did'nt even have to file any complaints. They eventually forced him to move (under rather murky circumstances).

A guy who's pulled that stuff for 10 years deserves no consideration. His mother does'nt want you on her property, that's her right. His mother can talk to the police when they show up with noise complaints, since she does'nt want to take them from you.

Document everything with this guy, and keep filing complaints with the police. If that does'nt work, drop by city/township hall with complaints.

Ha, ha! Maybe it is good to give them a little fear. It'll make them think twice about being noisy. We definitely do not condone behavior of psychos like the Unibomber, but apparently one of the things that drive him nuts was that even when he moved out to the middle of nowhere to get some quiet it happeend to be right in the path of an airport of something so he heard planes going overhead all day. Sometimes it seems like being deaf would be handy...too bad people don't have a device inside of them that lets them turn their hearing on and off .

We'll have to use this motto for the many family gatherings we have to attend this week (unfortunately several of our family members act like jerks--especially our step grandpa!) He once said he thinks Asperger's is a made up syndrome that people use as an excuse to get out of things. He once called us "little dictators" when we said we didn't want a bunch of pictures taken on Christmas. We were only about 14 so it made us cry. Jerk!

I read MIWJ in one book. I like it, but I do not know how widely it is talked about.

And your step grandpa does sound a real work of art. Wow. I guess the method of medium pause and then changing topic. And if the change of topic is abrupt, so be it.

I have started the very beginnings of experimenting (like with two people total) of telling people that Asperger's is first and foremost sensory issues and processing issues. And so of course I have to gear up in energy to interact with people. So, yes, I like people just fine. I still need my alone time.

And some people are open to human differences and some people aren't and I guess that's just the fact of the matter.

Sadly this is something that is going to just get worse for us, and people will talk about putting us all away in a place far from society (I've already heard it), and they'll look at us all in hatred because of their ignorance and fear. And like all things with them, it's something we'll never be able to control, nor change. And in the end, we'll be the ones to suffor from their stupidity, like usual.

People are so freaking stupid.

The only good thing about this is maybe people will treat us better with respect and not bully us because they will be so afraid of pushing us over the edge, we go on a shooting spree.