Strange stress response

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I am having problems with drowsiness during the day and it is becoming rather disruptive. At first I thought it was a sleeping disorder but now I wonder if it's some kind of strange stress response as it seems to happen most when I get overly stressed out by various things.

Basically I now seem to go one of two ways when I get stressed (depending). I either seem to get upset and blow a fuse (temper tantrum although I hate to use the word tantrum as its not really about getting my own way and more about trying to express my distress as I often cannot get people to understand. Plus it happens when I am alone a lot) or I go so drowsy all I can do is go to sleep. In the latter case I want to do things but just cannot...it's as though my brain refuses to process anything and won't function properly until I have had a sleep. My naps can last from 20 minutes up to 2 or so hours.

Is it possible that its not a sleep disorder and that it is another response to stress at times when I am feeling overloaded or too pressured?

I am under a lot of stress at the moment. As I am on disability for social anxiety, depression and anxiety (my diagnosis...I am not presently diagnosed with an ASD although I suspect one) the system wants me to 'get over' my life long social problems and undergo therapy etc. This is very difficult for me as they misinterpret everything I do and do not understand my social problems at all!

Firstly they think it is just about embarrassment and if I relax socialising will come to me naturally. Socialising is extreme wipe out for me with or without anxiety. Having to remember everything i am supposed to be doing, I am not supposed to be doing, reading peoples intentions, trying to hear what people are saying above the background noise, having to put up with people just calling me without giving notice, not getting enough time with my hobbies to relax, not being able to be myself in case my irritating habits emerge (such as remembering to tell people I am going to look at something when i see something of interest, remembering not to keep talking about the same thing, remembering not to go on and on about my interests, remembering to make eye contact, remembering not to talk about inappropriate subjects, remembering that conversations are two way and I should not talk over people, monitoring everything i say in case i accidentally offend someone, putting up with them rambling on about inane subjects I have no interest in and making pointless social chitty chat endlessly around some boring water cooler or some crap and so on...), trying to work out what I am supposed to be doing in response to what someone says or does and so on exhausts me.

Therefore I can only take socialising in short bursts (except in certain circumstances...ie with a life companion or partner whom I usually want to spend more time with than people in general) as all I am able to do afterwards is sleep it tires me so much. It can trigger my migraine headaches especially if i socialise too often for too long and I can also go drowsy during the social interaction and have a terrible time trying to keep myself awake or continue functioning. It's like torture sometimes

Therapists understand none of this!! !! !! !! !

They do not understand that things like studying subjects that fascinate me or pursuing my interests (which I adore to the ends of the earth and back) are more relaxing than making chitty chat, they seem to believe the study is work and that the socialising is fun when for me it is the other way around (I love learning and am presently undertaking a BSc in the natural sciences as I have a recent interest in fossils and evolution). I am also a high grade average and tend to me much better at academics the social stuff (which I usually get wrong no matter how hard I try). Academics comes to me more naturally. I'd also sometimes rather stay in with my other interest of arts and crafts (or more specifically tapestry and cross stitch) than go out for the evening to some overcrowded noisy social venue where the cacophony in my head from all the background noise stops me from being able to converse with anyone anyway.

They also misinterpret my personal preferences and habits, usually as a manifestation of depression. Ie I like to wear my comfy pyjamas in the house (although I do not sleep in these sets of clothing) as I can be uncomfortable in many types of day wear due to sensitive skin.

I am also not great at wearing make up every day and spending hours styling my hair. When I am pottering around the house or just going shopping, id rather just tie it back so its not flapping around in my face and wear something comfortable so I can focus on what Im doing without having to fiddle with my clothing all time due to it irritating me. Its practical it does not mean I am depressed! Yes I like to dress up sometimes on special occasions but not everyday.

I like having my routines...my world is chaos without them. I am not tied to the clock but prefer that my daily activities run in a specific order. This can also help me function as I can get flustered if the order is changed or if I start on my interests before getting chores done I will not get around to getting them done at all. I cannot be without my routines!! !! No I do not feel something bad will happen if I don't do them that way (as in ocd) I just cannot function well that is all.

Part of the reason I get my disability is because I don't cope well with change...this is true in many ways although some kinds of change don't upset me as much as others. The other reason I get it is because I don't cope well with social interaction.

Anyway, what I can't get them to understand is that it is the trying to change me that is causing my stress levels to hit the damn roof and I am presently stuck in a cycle of temper tantrums and/conking out with the drowsiness and not being able to do anything as a result.

I am not personally disturbed by my routines or oddities, I quite enjoy most of them, I just find they cause me awful problems socially because people do not understand them and expect me to be more like they are.

I don't really understand their world and I don't like being forced to live there...but I also get a lonely as I do crave the presence of a compatible companion/partner in my life and maybe one close friend (at most as I cannot cope with maintaining more friendships than that), mostly because I enjoy intimacy (sex) and also having someone to chat to about my interests. However, due to the above and my need for what seems to most to be an excessive amount of time alone doing my own thing, most of my relationships or friendships fall apart.

I feel a bit stuck in regards to both my stress responses which shut down my functioning and trying to explain things to a psychiatric profession who just don't 'get it'. Their treatments actually make me worse...including their meds which give me horrible side effects.

Anyway, sorry for the long post.

Any advice or feedback welcome.

Sorry about any typos, going sleepy.

Hi

I also have the response of feeling really tired if I am stressed, or if there is an event that causes me anxiety.

When I was in a stressful job where I got bullied, I used to sleep through every alarm I could possibly find...!

I found this link from another thread on this forum. I don't know who posted it and I'm sorry that I can't reference the finder.

It talks about full shutdowns....I have them.....perhaps this will help?

http://everything2.com/index.pl?node_id=1707940

I'm going to look at that link, too - but I go through this with stress. My psychologist took it seriously. I told him I used the computer to record myself doing homework and I fell asleep - I hadn't realized it and caught it only because I recorded it - I was out for about 5 minutes. I told him I had been tired but he said something else was going on - something was causing me stress - we got off track so I will revisit the topic with him and let you know what I learn.

Wow - what an excellent article!

Bumble, those sound like shutdowns to me. They specifically sound like many of the shutdowns I had in high school, college, and some of my jobs. Daily severe shutdowns that started out with this "fatigue/exhaustion" you mention are what cost me two of my four attempts at college, as I was unable to attend class reliably and frequently shutdown in various places around the college.

Also:

Shutdowns and stress in autism

http://www.fearlessswimming.com/files/S ... Autism.pdf

I get that a lot, too. If I'm stressed out by something, I have to sleep for upwards of two hours. I wasn't 100% aware that they were shutdowns, though.

bumble, I can relate to an awful lot of what you said. I quit my job last year due to these kinds of issues. I would try to do my job, but I just couldn't focus on what I was reading or make any sense of it, and instead I would just fall asleep (or most likely nearly fall asleep but manage to somehow keep my eyes open). I got diagnosed with idiopathic hypersomnia at the time, and AS a couple of months later.

Today I started a new job and instead of feeling nervous and alert, I felt really sleepy. The timing of this post is uncanny.

I read the first article linked and was kind of shocked. I didn't really know about shutdowns, only meltdowns or "tantrums", and selective mutism. Are most people with autism aware of shutdowns, and if so how did I miss this information?! I'm going to read through the second one as well as this looks quite insightful. Thanks so much for the links, EstherJ and Verdandi.