Obsessions that reflected your inner feelings

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I have been prone to a number of obsessions that reflected my inner feelings. For example because of how much I wanted to beat up this one boy I devoted my life to training, talking about beating others up, comparing myself to some of the strongest people, trying to be the most powerful etc. well that ended a long time ago. When I was younger I used to also obsess about NT's to the point where I had no self esteem. I would spend my free time making lists of all the coolest NT's in my school, obsessing intensely over them, almost worshipping them and giving them celebrity like status. I would write scripts and memorize "cool" nt lines from characters such as Drake from drake and josh and spent arduous hours trying to practice being cool. This was many years ago and i HATED it for a long time since last year. However at that time my self esteem was so low even one social mistake drove me into depression.