Does having neighbours bother you?

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I absolutely hate having neighbours, I mean the kind that are so close that they influence you, because you can hear or smell them. When I'm at home, I just don't want to hear or see anyone. Especially not people who are talking and stomping around all day. Ideally I would live totally alone, without neighbours in a 5 km range.

This might be a strange question but I used to live without neighbours for 18 years, and I just can't get used to having people around me at all times when I'm at home. Even when I can't see them and they're being rather quiet I don't like the feeling. Apparently many NTs like it, because it makes them feel safe and not alone. But I want solitude, at least in and around my home.

I agree with you 100%. I don't want to live in a property with neighbours on either side, especially adjoining. I want to live with people at least 200m as a bare minimum, away. People are frequently loud, obnoxious and unfriendly. I don't want to mix with them either.

I have always lived in urban areas/suburbs. Most people in those areas don't want to have much to do with their neighbors. I'm myself like that, too. I've had very nasty neighbors in the past and I hated it, but most neighbors are actually nice. You have to be unlucky to have bad ones. They are not intrusive, but when necessary (though seldom), they are willing to help. It definitely does feel safe. So I want to have neighbors that I'm on good terms with and that I don't have to interact with unnecessarily. I don't want to have noisy/nosy/nasty/smelly neighbors.

There is no answer for my reply. I have neighbours, but usually they are fine, but one of them is kind of rude and annoying.

It bothers me, but I can bear it (like I've got much choice)

I have lived in 4 different locations in urban areas, always in blocks of flats with 8 apartments in each stairwell (2 flats on each floor). I have no idea what it's like to not have neighbors you hear and sometimes smell, but it sounds awesome. I've had nosy, nasty, crazy, gossipy, overly talkative, always popping by to borrow stuff, always complaining about us, smelly, sour, strange, noisy neighbors, as well as quite a few neutral ones and a few I'd call nice.

I'd either like a place far from people or an urban setting, because people in little places are way too intrusive and nosy. The good thing about cities is that people usually only have so much contact with their neighbors (and every convenience is nearby, but that's not relevant here).

Even God is aware of such problems, there is a scripture somewhere that commands the Israelites to only build detached houses.

When I retire, I wish a place in the countryside, miles from people, preferably in the woods with the wolves.

My current neighbours, though quite nice, have a pack of dogs in their flat that will bark constantly when they are out, and as I work shifts!, each bark makes me jump, even though I know it is coming.

The other problem, is that their kitchen is the other side of my bedroom wall, and when they shut one of their kitchen cupboards, it sounds like they are banging on my wall with a hammer.

We are attached one side. I hear them open and close kitchen cupboards, have arguments, or even ordinary conversations, sneezing, their TV, doors closing, upstairs it's electrical things being plugged and unplugged, coughing, talking on the phone (so clear you can hear the conversations at times), music, their relative's children coming round thumping, screaming, banging. Then there are the balls and toys coming into the back garden that they want back (I hate this with a vehemence). I have two children and we have never let things go over the fence into their garden.

Still, the thinnest walls were on a holiday I went on once. You could hear the man nextdoor peeing into the toilet, even shaving his face, the walls were like paper.

That's just the noise problems we have with neighbours, there have been all sorts of other types of problems too.

I've always had close neighbors, so it doesn't bother me too much. My schedule is opposite of most of them anyway, so they're gone when I'm home a lot. Maybe it's because I had roommates for a few years that it doesn't get to me--that was much much worse.

1. In Kew Gardens, Queens, NY I had my upstairs neighbor call the police on me because my band was practicing in my living room, and we were an acoustic group, too.
2. My current next door neighbor bangs on the wall when I listen to music or watch TV at night so I make sure to keep it down.
3. The Spanish neighbors across the street must have floor-to-ceiling speakers because it sounds like a nightclub over there on the weekends.
4. I've lived in five buildings where there was drug activity. (Says a lot about my past, right?) At night the tenants had in and out guests practically every five minutes.
5. In one of the above drug motels, I exited my room to go to work and walked past a man's corpse already decomposing in a corner.
6. In my apartment in upstate NY, the next door neighbor, a woman in her early 20's, used to SCREAM at her baby. It was so loud, and so often, that I called CPS. They said they won't investigate because yelling is not punishable. She'd had to be hitting the child which I said I didn't know if she did.

I grew up in a rural area. Then I lived a long time in an urban area with REALLY close neighbors. Attached houses that you can hear through the walls in. Now I live in a suburban area. I can never hear my neighbors. When I have to go back to a urban environment, I can feel the anxiety creeping in. I can't stand the closeness of everything. I don't mind the suburban environment. I am not good with distance, but each house is on about 1/4 to 1/3 of an acre. That distance isn't too bad to me, though I like where my friend lives better. Each house is on a full acre. My parents live in the middle of nowhere on 40 acres, and that is a bit too secluded for me.

I would definitely lives miles deep into the woods. Being as self-sufficient as possible. Currently living underneath a very loud stomper, nightly clothes washing/drying 9p-1a typically, and next to a loud dog with the neighbors that think their fire escape is their back porch... ugh. It sucks having a window right at their back door, we can't even use it in good weather so we put the a/c there.

Anyway, yeah, I strongly dislike the company of other human beings, unless of course the human is my husband.

I've lived in apartments and condo's before and it didn't bother me to have people surrounding me just on the other side of the wall instead of a yard even though I grew up in a house that was on a corner lot. The last time we lived in an apartment was in early 1993 and I do not think I would like having someone just on the other side of the wall at all now. I wouldn't like having to be quiet at certain times or hearing them if they made noise, and I know I would notice them and resent it no matter what. I also wouldn't like not having a yard or any place to sit outside with privacy.

We have been living out here in the country for 11 years now and even though we live in a subdivision our houses aren't as close together as they have been in places in the city that we lived in. Even though I would very much like to move back to the city I don't think I would like having houses that close to me or that close to the street again. I would feel crowded.

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I'm giving it another shot. We will see.
My forum is still there and everyone is welcome to come join as well. There is a private women only subforum there if anyone is interested. Also, there is no CAPTCHA.

The link to the forum is http://www.rightplanet.proboards.com

I would prefer to have Aspie neighbors.

I can tolerate it as I don't leave the house that often and I live in a semi-detached house with reasonably thick walls but I don't like coming across them suddenly. On the one side they would probably say hello but the other side is less predictable and I hate that. I've had fallouts with both sides in the past but we get by ok and I usually ask my friend to deal with them if necessary and generally don't think about them from day to day.

I can hear them when in the bathroom sometimes and they have their music on loud at times but it's not unbearable

They should be paying us as we're hardly ever out so we're an excellent burglar deterrent and always there to take in parcels for either side

I think you need to be among other people to a certain extent otherwise you go funny in the head.