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elsing
Raven
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27 May 2013, 3:11 pm

Has learning about AS helped you understand why you have gone wrong socially?

I used to think that setting myself apart made me really interesting. I assumed any difference would jump start a conversation and win me friends for my quirkiness.
If everyone was having a conversation about how great something was and my experience was negative, in a non confrontational way I would say so.
If people were trying some game simply because someone popular likes it, I wouldn't bother trying it.
When it snows and everyone is whining about it I'm wishing for more.
Most recent example, the whole office was in agreement that there is no such thing a physic ability, as ever the most socially high ranking person made the statement first, others followed. I disagreed and gave my view.
I had always revelled in the fact I met my boyfriend online, back in the days when meeting people online was the subject of talk shows warning people against it, when this became normal I felt genuinely annoyed.

So I was always so surprised to find that my gleeful highlighting of my differences never quite had the impact I expected.
I have figured now that it's more to do with people like their little circles to be full of people that agree with each other and being different kind of breaks that energy - I'm assuming in conversation there is something like a build up of energy to them.

I haven't changed this, I'm more aware of it and this is just my way of communicating, as my mother always says when I talk about my social problems 'just say the first thing that comes in to you head', well this is it.

So AS may explain this. Anyone else had these kind of realisations.


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My Personality + BAP/Aspergers + My Experiences = Me
AS: 135/200 NT: 81/200 AQ: 33 EQ: 8 ADHD-I: 25/35 BAP: BAP/Autistic MBTI: INTJ Ennagrame: 5 6 Wing
No official DX, all I know is I am not NT


elsing
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27 May 2013, 3:15 pm

Here's another one.

'Hi how are you?'

This requires the response:

'Great, how are you?'

The expected response of the other

'Great thanks, so....'

Not my old response of an actual breakdown of how I am, good or bad with no enquiry about my listener. Then a sense of annoyance about why I am getting sympathy if how I am is bad.


_________________
My Personality + BAP/Aspergers + My Experiences = Me
AS: 135/200 NT: 81/200 AQ: 33 EQ: 8 ADHD-I: 25/35 BAP: BAP/Autistic MBTI: INTJ Ennagrame: 5 6 Wing
No official DX, all I know is I am not NT


auntblabby
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27 May 2013, 7:29 pm

I can dig it. :idea: I always was a contrarian myself, especially when I was young.



torquemada
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18 Jun 2013, 6:12 pm

I relate very strongly and with growing chagrin, to the OP.


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Aspie Score 173/200. NT score 43/200. AQ 37.
BAP: 108% Aloof. 117% Rigid. 112% Pragmatic.
Conformity sucks anyway.


jk1
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18 Jun 2013, 6:56 pm

My experience is similar. I realize most people would consider someone that doesn't agree as being smart, know-it-all etc. So the result is usually negative.



Joe90
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19 Jun 2013, 12:12 pm

Quote:
When it snows and everyone is whining about it I'm wishing for more.


Where I live it's the other way round. Most people love the snow, and only a few people dislike it. I absolutely HATE it, to the point where it's become an anxiety in my life. So when other people go, ''ohh good, it's going to snow!'', and people on Facebook sound like that are praying for the snow when forecasted, I'm like, ''noooo way!! !'' Once when it was sleeting, I put, ''oh good, it's raining!'' and someone commented on my status saying, ''no it's not, it's practically snowing.'' My family say I spoil the winter by whining about the snow. At least I love the heat, though.


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