My five questions

Post Reply New Topic

The questions I put to myself in almost ANY conversation I have With other People is:

1) Have I hurt somebody now?
2) Are somebody pissed off at me now?
3) Did I misunderstand something?
4) Did I become too intense, did I let the other part into the conversation enough?
5) Did I get the essence of the conversation, or did I become distant and offend the other part in the conversation because of it?

Those are my main questions after having had conversations With other People.

I think we all ask those questions sometimes.

I do think you mean this in a comforting way, but you really miss the mark With Your comment. Those sentences were not written by me as a complaint, but as statements about my inner life, as a result of having aspergers.

Dont answer Logical sentences With feelings......?

Take it as a statement of fact, at least for most people on the spectrum. If you doubt the truth in that statement, there is a poll option available.

Take it as a statement of fact, at least for most people on the spectrum. If you doubt the truth in that statement, there is a poll option available. [/quote]

Of course its true, it just misses the mark.

I am used to getting similar remarks from neurotypical People, who means it as a comforting thought. But I am fine With being a little bit different from other People, that is, being autistic. Thats what I meant.

I'm confused on your goal with that statement. It seems to be an expression of insecurity while interacting with other people. Since there are separate answers for each instance this takes place in your life, what are you hoping to achieve? Is it meant to be a statement of acceptance of a level of insecurity due to autism?

No, in my opinion it is caused by autism, not insecurity. The hope I have With asking myself those questions, is to uncover Things that might hurt other People, that is, to avoid misunderstandings. And I have always asked myself those questions, even since childhood. Not always in a concious way, but they pop up in my head. Is it like that for you too?

And yes to Your last sentence.

Last edited by Mimmy on 13 Jul 2013, 4:18 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Constantly.

    I'm not trying to be rude here; WHY did you post this?
    It's interesting enough I reckon, was there a purpose(beyond sharing) that I missed?

The purpose was sharing.

Mine:

1. I wonder what's for lunch?

2. Do I have to get up early tomorrow? I hope not.

3. I wonder if there's anything interesting on the internet?

4. What students do I have today?

5. When do I get to go to the library next?

    Yay! I didn't miss the point after all!

I would say I ask myself #3 and #4 all the time. Plus "is the other person actually interested in what I'm saying?" The things I find interesting few seem to share my appreciation for - I view conversations (good ones) as an exchange of information. For example, one of the guys I enjoyed talking to (who turned out to be AS) and I tended to swap anthropology and psychology perspectives on things. Ask me to talk about shoes, boys, or other stereotypically girly things (or stereotypically guy things like sports, even) and I'm at a complete loss. That may fall under #4 as well, trying to figure out if I let the other person do enough "normal" conversation relative to my "information" conversation.

Probably smart questions to ask yourself if you're trying to monitor situations.

Yeah.....sometimes those are MY questions too......except nr. 1, 4 and 5. I have to make lunch myself. But I DO Wonder what I am going to have for dinner, though.....for lunch it is almost always some kind of sandwich. I can find myself pondering over what I am going to have for dinner for a veeeeery long time, before making a decision.

The questions I put to myself in almost ANY conversation I have With other People is:

1. Are they saying anything intelligent?

2. Are they saying anything of interest to me?

3. Are they interested in receiving incoming input?

4. Have I had a conversation w/ them before?

5. If so, was it worth the time? (If not, what probability exists from the context?)