Do we look at mouth instead of eyes due to being...

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Jonov
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26 Jul 2013, 5:40 am

For me the whole face is the problem usually, it is as if I mirror in an extreme form, and try to mimic the facial expression of the other person subconsciously.

For instance if a person has a natural smile on their face I will find myself wanting to smile, but because I feel that those expressions often do not match with what I am about to say, I have to reset my face so to speak by looking at a wall or other expressionless object, to make sure I do not lose my train of thought.

But when I do look at a person I actually look at their eyes only, because I somehow can block out the intensity of their facial expression that way.



greyjay
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26 Jul 2013, 9:49 am

I often look at the mouth because I have delays in auditory processing and lip reading in addition to listening helps me concentrate on what the person is saying. I find eye contact overloading and distracting, I would prefer not to look at the person's face at all. I also often look at a person's ear or nose when I need to fake eye contact, this is usually effective, but I loose track of what they are saying.



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26 Jul 2013, 10:14 am

I just plain don't do eye contact; I can't. I usually look at people's mouths when they're talking. I was only diagnosed last November at the age of 28 but I went through life knowing that people like eye-contact but equally finding it extremely difficult. It's a bit of a compromise, I think - people often think I'm making eye contact when I'm not, because I'm still looking at part of their face (also, I wear tinted Irlen glasses so it's a bit harder to tell precisely where I'm looking). I think also some of it is that in a busy environment we can't always make out what people are saying purely from sounds because of sensory issues (I get sound distortion; if there are multiple noises going on it all blurs into one unintelligible noise) so lipreading compensates somewhat for that.


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Harrison54
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26 Jul 2013, 10:16 am

I've always watched a person talk rather than looked them in the eyes. I find that if I look away I have difficulty understanding what is said, especially as many of people I talk to speak in a variety of foreign accents.

As has been said previously, eye contact puts me in overload, like my brain is receiving too much information in one shot. My Taiqi teacher once commented on it saying 'if the eyes are the windows of the soul maybe you guys are just to good at reading souls' 8O


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btbnnyr
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26 Jul 2013, 10:44 am

What does it mean there is too much information to process from the eyes?

Besides the physical features of the eyes, what information is there to process?

I don't know why eye looking causes overload and anxiety for so many people.

I don't see anything special in the eyes, and there is nothing special coming out of them to overload me.


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Tuttle
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26 Jul 2013, 11:06 am

I don't tend to look at the face at all. I don't know how people get information from the mouth, just that they do.



AlaskaSupertramp
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28 Jul 2013, 7:58 pm

btbnnyr wrote:
What does it mean there is too much information to process from the eyes?

Besides the physical features of the eyes, what information is there to process?

I don't know why eye looking causes overload and anxiety for so many people.

I don't see anything special in the eyes, and there is nothing special coming out of them to overload me.


To me it's not about getting too much information, but looking someone in the eye somehow seems very agressive to me. It's like I can't hide anywhere and I get really nervous. I also get, I dunno, kind of hypnotised when I have to keep looking someone in the eye, to the point where I can't listen/respond to what is being said.



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28 Jul 2013, 8:11 pm

I tend to look at the hands. They are moving them and it's very distracting.


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28 Jul 2013, 8:15 pm

I don't look people in the eyes because I feel like the other person can read my mind while the contact is being made. I've also learned recently that I read lips, and it helps me focus on what is being said by one person when multiple people are talking.



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28 Jul 2013, 8:15 pm

Quote:
I think I started looking at mouths simply because I couldn't understand what they were saying. I think audio processing was the initial reason for me.


Yeah, that's a big issue for me. In noisy environments I have to stare at the person's mouth to understand what they say.

Other reasons why I may not look at a person's eyes:

1. I have trouble simultaneously processing their speech and the visual input from their eyes, and I feel it's more important to know what they've said than to know that they have such pretty eyes.

2. It's uncomfortably intimate.

3. I just forget.


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28 Jul 2013, 8:22 pm

I didnt really realize this was a preference until yall mentioned it! IMO, its easier to figure out what context/mood someone's talking to you in if you look at their mouth rather than their eyes. The way people's mouths move seems to indicate whether theyre happy or agitated or bored with the conversation. Also, i try not to stare at people's eyes the whole time theyre talking to me because i think it makes people feel uncomfortable and creeped out. I remember teachers in school being really happy about the fact that I'd stare them in the eyes all the time, they thought I payed really good attention, hah. my 2 cents.



velocirapture
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28 Jul 2013, 10:11 pm

This is a good point.

Also, if I look at somebody's eyes a lot, I feel like I am staring at them, and in return they are staring at me. I dislike being stared at, and because of that I also try not to stare at others.



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29 Jul 2013, 1:27 am

I'm a big mouth watcher -- lots of problems with eye contact -- and as a result, I notice people's teeth. And I CAN'T STAND funky, messed-up teeth. I'm sorry if I offend some of you out there. But I just can't do it -- snaggly, uneven or rotten teeth drive me up a wall. Some have been known to turn my stomach. But almost as bad are obviously capped teeth. That seems to be a big thing these days, and many of them are done poorly and look fake. I always thought I noticed teeth because I have straight teeth myself, but I guess it could be attributed to my Aspie-ism somehow.



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29 Jul 2013, 11:56 am

analyser23 wrote:
distracted by movement?

Being highly distracted by visual movement is a trait for those with an ASD, and yesterday when I was watching TV I realised that I tend to look at a person's mouth more than their eyes because there are more obvious and bigger movements going on there. There isn't really a lot of "movement" happening with someone's eyes compared with their mouth, or hands, or of course other stuff going on around us at the time.

I have seen a few programs where they show what someone with an ASD looks at during a conversation and it tends to be more so their mouth than their eyes...

Just a thought!


If its people I know and that are used to me, I look at the mouth, because its helping me to understand the person in front of me. I have good hearing, but its hard for me to separate noises from each other, so if its not silent or more then one person speaking, its a lot of help. With people that are new to me, I try to look at the part above the nose (where indians have that point) to pretend to look them into the eyes.



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29 Jul 2013, 12:18 pm

When looking in people's eyes I find I have difficulty concentrating on what they say because my mind is running like a cage full of squirrels trying to figure out what their face and eyes are telling me. I suppose if I were good at reading expressions or micro-expressions rapidly I wouldn't be so frustrating. It's like trying to listen and respond to two people talking at the same time. If I only watch someone's mouth it's back to one person again; better for me not for the person who's mouth I'm watching I think. :(

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30 Jul 2013, 9:06 am

hmm. i do tend to focus on mouths of others when I am listening to them speak, but I have a specific reason for this. sometimes my verbal comprehension is not... accurate. sometimes the words I hear get sort of smooshed together and I have to ask the person to repeat what they said. sometimes more than once. so, what I do is look at mouth of other person as an accuracy check to compliment my audio comprehension. reading lips to confirm whether what I heard is consistent with the mouth movement.