Lack of emotional comprehension and empathy.

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I have seen lots of posts of people saying the stereotype of autistics not having empathy or feelings is incorrect.
At the same time I have trouble with these things and wonder if it is related to Asperger's or not. I am hoping to get some input to help understand myself better.

I do have some emotions at time such as I am able to laugh or get angry, but even these do not seem too intense. My emotional memory doesn't seem to work at all. I do not remember what the brief emotions I had felt like once they were gone.

I have no understanding of what people call "feelings". When people say something hurt their feelings or that they feel emotion it makes no sense to me. I am unable to sympathize with other peoples feelings either because they seem ridiculous to me.

Most people to me seem over sensitive and honestly it annoys me but even that annoyance is temporary and I soon forget about it. I do not understand why people have emotional weaknesses.

People have tried several times to explain what they call basic emotions to me and I just cannot comprehend it. To me they seem delusional. Some things that make no sense are worry, romance, shame, and any sort of self-destructive emotion. I cannot understand why anyone would want anything less than the best for themselves.

I have no problem with being this way and am thankful that I am more logically sophisticated but I still wonder if this is related to Asperger's or if it's just something different about me.

I challenge that notion too. I remember being a kid and not feeling that much for people. I think the problem is that there are mild ends of the autism spectrum and some people may have more empathy than others. I've only learned empathy for other people in the last couple of years. I think empathy for autistics is stronger in one or two areas and weak in others.

It's easy for me to stop caring about people. I do understand feelings because of my stupid intense emotions because of my mood disorder and I'd rather not have them, though the highs are good. My normal moods feel dull in comparison.

Having feelings hurt usually has to do with pride and having people disagree with you. I'm in a cynical mood tonight.

Some emotions can be good if they are practical. My anxiety can get me moving to do something I need to do. Shame is counter-productive. Romance is a waste of time to me.

Over emotional people distress me. I'm pretty sensitive to emotions. I can seem pretty dull around most people and I think I'm partly disabled by the intensity of people's emotions. I do have my own extreme emotions because of bipolar but I can also barely feel anything.

I've heard some autistics report they have a 'thick skin.'

In a way I react to peoples negative emotions as well. I remember my ex-girlfriend panicking over not being able to open a jar and I got really mad at her stupid reaction because it was unnecessary. I've been diagnosed with bipolar too as part of schizoaffective disorder but I don't experience depression the way most depressed people do. What they have called depressive symptoms for me is more of a loss of motivation and energy but seems to manifest as narcissism more than typical depression.

In many ways, self destructive behaviour is a coping mechanism, so could be said to be a way of seeking what is best for oneself.
The organism is strongly programmed to survive.

My alcohol use is mainly about seeking temporary relief from extreme distress.
Anorexics I have known are seeking the only control they can find in a world they find to be too chaotic.
Cutters speak of emotional release; of letting it out
Extreme sport is often about having a dialogue with death to enhance the experience of living.

I have no skin at all...

If the organism is programmed to survive wouldn't self destructive behavior do the opposite?
I do like to drink beer but I definitely don't need it. It's just something I enjoy but I don't do it to a point where I get sick or have any negative effects.
I have never understood cutters or anorexics. It makes no sense to me. My best guess is they get an aderenline rush from it.
I understand sports because they can be fun for people. I would like to play baseball if I weren't so clumsy.

My depression is a mixed bag. I think I go through every type. But the mixed mania and depression and everything else that you can think to put with it does make me sound narcissistic. I can just as well lose complete confidence in myself though.

The schizoaffective disorder could be responsible for the blunted emotions and lack of empathy. I'm not sure though. I have no experience with it.

You're not far off there. Cutting releases endorphins. Apparently self-injurious behaviour like head banging does the same thing. It does feel pretty good.
Anorexia is just a poor sense of body image. I don't know too much about it but I think they always think they are too fat. I'm unsure if they actually see it like that. I've had body delusions too. More to do with sensations though.

No wonder I was never good at extreme sports. I'm too scared about breaking bones.

As I said: destructive behaviour can be a means of survival.
Reread my post to get a glimpse of my perception of cutters and anorexics - I reckon your perception is way off.

For sports - I'm thinking of extreme stuff like mountaineering where one is always testing one's limits with death being the criterion for failure.
My best mate used to ride his bike at stupid speeds round welsh country roads. He did it to escape the pain of loss. He had to focus entirely in the moment so couldn't think or feel anything but the moment...

I'm still not getting how self destruction has anything to do with survival but your comment about living in the moment made me think of something.
When I posted this I also posted a topic about living in the moment. I'm already there. I have no idea how people don't live in the moment. This causes me problems with planning ahead or learning from consequences but at the same time I am free of worry of the future or dwelling on the past. Its another topic I cannot relate to people who don't always live in the moment. Isn't the moment the only thing we truly have?

I read that post and envied you.

I obsess about the past, and fear for the future; don't learn from past mistakes, and cannot plan for the future. Lose/lose. Very occasionally, like last night, I get a bit of time in "the moment" and I cherish it.

Anxiety dwells on past mistakes and future failures.

I went through a period of really focusing on being in the moment and wanting it to last.

But I'm pretty good at keeping myself planning ahead even though things might not always work out.

From a time perspective, yes. This moment really is all we have.

That is not exactly what "living in the moment" always means though.

From a Zen perspective, if you are thinking about things, your thoughts will distract you from attending to the present moment because you are occupied by your thinking. Of course there are different types of thoughts and some such as thinking about general intentions are very different (and much more useful) than discursive thinking that can go on endlessly.

So "present moment" doesn't always mean from a time perspective, but within this present moment can you react to things as they occur (such as dealing with people) or are you so into your own thoughts that the world goes by you.

I would say it seems the world just passes me by.

I'll try to give advise but I'm not quite sure how it works because it seems natural to me. I don't really think as I act and just do things as they come which can have good and bad results. When I try to think before acting it becomes confusing. At the same time logic tells me to not worry about anything because it won't make a difference in how things resolve. I witness others worrying about things all the time that they have no control over. Some people seem afraid to go outside but you are just as likely to die in your own house so the best thing to do is to live life and take the oppourtunities you get because they may not come again. Some people are afraid of failure but the only reason they fail is they are afraid to try. Not everyone is going to be #1 at everything. Even as I try to think ahead I think of nothing but when I just do things they seem to come out of nowhere.

Really succinctly put.

I should use it as a sig...