Do you know anyone who's less social than yourself?

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Just wondering. I was sitting there feeling deeply resentful towards my brother (again), whose rude, anti-social behaviors makes me just want to disown him. Compared to him I'm like a social butterfly, and he doesn't have autism. I wonder if this is because I'm a woman and have to put on the act more. I smile, try to have eye contact and maintain good manners, while the males in my life don't seem to try very much.

What about you? Do you have friends or family who are even less social?

*I should clarify that I don't think rude behavior is acceptable no matter what condition a person has. It hurts people's feelings and nobody's entitled to hurting people's feelings for free.

It might be difficult for some to distinguish between un-social and anti-social. I prefer to withdraw. The more people involved in a situation, the more I prefer to withdraw.

For someone to engage socially in a positive way, I suspect they have to tune out a lot of the information that would overwhelm me.

For someone to engage socially in a negative way, they would have to be either malicious or obtuse.

In dealing with the obtuse, the phrase "setting boundaries" can be useful.

In dealing with your brother, you may want to try using a phrase like, "Ouch that one really hurt. Did you intend that to be a zinger?"

I have an uncle who is a hermit that lives in a shack he built in the middle of nowhere and spends all of his time fishing...But I think he's still more social than me.

I'm not anti-social. I'm non social. I rarely go out. Today, when I go to the Lutheran Church for Thanksgiving dinner I'll most likely remain silent and quiet and barely talk to anyone. I was always able to get out of get togethers or parties at work, too. I've never been to a funeral and have been to one wedding.

I was thinking yesterday: my neighbours know I live alone. Suppose one of them had the nerve to ask me to join them at their family Thanksgiving dinner. I would have to think of an excuse really quickly as I don't like family situations like that. I'm pretty creative though so I would've said something like, "Oh, I already ate" or "Oh, I already ordered some food and it's coming soon."

Last edited by redrobin62 on 28 Nov 2013, 1:51 pm, edited 1 time in total.

[opinion=hyperbole]

If anyone is less social than I, they must be living in a cave.

[/opinion]

Not personally. I know of people who are approxiamtely as asocial and socially inept as I am, but have only spoken to them online. Offline, in my personal circle, I seem to be the absolute extreme of a maladjusted social hermit. I look at relatives, acquaintances, and co-workers etc. just getting along with each other on auto-pilot, and me just standing there stumped for words. The feeling of being an 'alien' on the 'wrong planet' has never been greater for me than it is now.

I have many friends who isolate themselves more than I. I run with a pretty weird crowd as you might imagine...

No, I am the most unsocial (not anti-social) person I know.

No, but I am not a hermit. I just need a considerable amount of time alone. I prefer small parties and I can be lively and talkative, - but most of the time, I am somewhat to the quiet side. I may withdraw now and then.
I can be by myself for days or weeks, happily minding my interests or projects.
I have good friends whom I like to be with, - but a shack by a river wouldn´t be bad now and then.

^^This.^^ I just came back from Thanksgiving lunch with my family, where I stood against the wall for two hours and listened to everybody else talk, then slipped out when no one was looking and drove home. I still feel stressed by the whole thing.

To be any less social than me, you'd have to be catatonic.

My late husband lived in a cave for 7 months [which included the entire winter] while attending college, and he was VERY social.

i do not know anybody less social than me.

No, but it's not like I'm seeking them out....

I am probably the least social person I know (not counting online folk), though some members of my family aren't too far off.

my youngest brother, age 23, is more anti social than me in a way.

Don't get me wrong, he does things that i dont do, he spends all his free time playing games with a headset on talking to his friends, so in a sense he's more social than me because i dont go out of my way to talk to people.

But when it comes to behaviour, he is so nasty at times. He growls if you open his bedroom door, he's got such a bad attitude to everyone but his mates. He's got so many rough edges and he's completely unapologetic about it.

I am anti social, i dont have friends like that and neither do i want any, but im not nasty about it in the slightest. Wake me up in the middle of the night and i would smile and be polite. Even if i dont like someone im always polite. Talk to me in the park when i just want to be alone and i wont even allow a hint of my not wanting to talk to colour my attitude. I've always got time for people. There is never any reason for me to start the rudeness.

Oh, except, the only people im ever rude to are as a reaction to other people being rude. i dont hesitate for a moment to tell my brother off for his rudeness. Thats the only thing that ever brings it out of me.