Are people acceptive of you before you get to know them?

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Uprising
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04 Dec 2013, 2:31 pm

Do they tolerate you on first sight?

Or do they instantly turn their nose up the first second they see you?

Or does the opposite happen?

Do they become more acceptive of you after they got to know you?

Or neither?

Do some people complain about other things about you than your behaviour?

I know from back in the days that "relationships" with most people tend to worsen drastically with time but are often actually good during the first days or hours of introduction in my situation.



pleasekillme
Snowy Owl
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04 Dec 2013, 3:13 pm

People almost never accept me until they've gotten to know me a little bit. I mean, at least as far as I can tell. Lack of explicit rejection does not necessarily imply that I've been accepted. It might be more subtle than that and I'm not picking it up. But usually people warm up to after getting to know me, if they do at all.



coffeebean
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04 Dec 2013, 4:22 pm

I'm a wallflower. Nobody really notices me either way.



ASPartOfMe
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04 Dec 2013, 4:38 pm

I don't have the cognitive empathy ability to know what people think of me when they first meet me. The whole "first impression" idea just does not work for me. I am going to increasingly frustrate very extroverted people and boisterous people. For the more "mellow" types they either increasingly like and respect me or just increasingly respect me even if they don't like me.


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LucySnowe
Deinonychus
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04 Dec 2013, 4:46 pm

Uprising wrote:

Or do they instantly turn their nose up the first second they see you?



No. I think this is a common misconception that people with AS tend to have; we're so used to considering ourselves outsiders that we automatically think that other people must think that of us as well. I think most people go into situations with no preconceived ideas--and then when we appear to be aloof, they mirror that. That's for people who don't know me all that well; when I do get close to people, I turn out to be the opposite of what people thought I was. And that's why I hear so many contradictory things said about me.



FishStickNick
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05 Dec 2013, 12:59 am

I don't really know what others think of me most of the time, but I've been told that I seem a little different, quirky, or "offbeat" upon first meeting, and that as others get to know me, they become more accustomed to my personality quirks.



TheConfusedOne
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05 Dec 2013, 4:39 am

im generally accepted by people when they get to know me a bit as long as i dont mess up saying something or doing something offputting. i have some basic sosial antennae but i do miss a lot of responses through body language and face recognicion, these things have been an issue throughout my life ruinining first impressions and such situations.