Having doubts returning to university? help

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I'm at a university in London and its been so tough but I've been so positive and not let anything get me down. Where I was staying was lonely and not very social even though I tried. I get bad vibes of people since moving here because I'm abit different. I have always had difficulties in school and hated being there. I have been in lower special education almost nearly all my school years and left school with a silly certificate.(actually don't think I got sent) I have only really made 1 friend since starting uni. I don't have real friends back home either maybe just 1 but she's hardly a real friend.I'm still in my home town as its been Christmas and now I having doubts returning to uni. I'm mildy autistic but I love myself as I am and don't care what people think. I have trouble with my family, my family can say very heartless things to me when they want to be. I have been told you have isolated yourself more by moving miles away from family,etc. If I don't return to uni what would I do? I would never be able to get funding again either. I'm sick of forcing myself into things and trying so hard.

Congratulations!

It's a wonderful thing that you are in a position to ask this question. You should be proud of yourself for making it this far.

What are you going to uni for? What area are you studying? What is your diagnosis? Does the university offer services or programs for autistics? Are there accommodations for your neurology that they can help you to build into your course of study? This could reduce the pressure and fatigue and is a very good idea, if they can work with you.

The other thing is the loneliness and isolation. It sound a like you have a real friend at uni and none at home but miss the support from your family? Are there any groups you can join at uni? Clubs for your special interests? Support groups for autistic students?

If I were you, I would try very hard to stay at uni and make it work. If you can develop some social supports and a program with accommodations that work, you might find yourself in a few years with professional credentials, a few real friends and some very useful skills for navigating life.

I hope you can get some rest and then get some information about what help may be available.

I wish you a very happy new year.

Being from the USA, I'm not sure if my advice is helpful.

Here, we have to pay to go to school. Often by financing with student loans.

Clearly, it's not wise to continue school if you won't see it through to the end because each semester is more debt you must repay without the piece of paper you were working towards.

Also, most schools put a time limit on when you must finish your program by. So, dropping out is a question of how far you have gone and if you could change your mind and go back to finish before the time runs out.

Right now it might not be a bad idea to do a little self-assessment.

What do you really enjoy. If there were no constraints on money or other limits, what would you prefer for your life?

Would you like to be a wife and mother (do not be ashamed if this is your ambition).

Would you like to be a cutting edge avaunt guard artist living in a loft?

Would you like to be a scholarly academic publishing papers and doing research in a field of inquiry you enjoy?

Would you like to drive a cab and meet a constantly changing clientele?

Would you like to be a welder?

Would you like to be a chef?

There are many possibilities. You should not feel that going to school and getting a job in a corporation is the only option.

It is better to fail at doing something you enjoy than succeed in doing something you hate.

Thank you so much for the comments

The reason I moved to uni is because I was so sick of being stuck and I felt lucky to get this only option. I thought moving would be a fresh start. That I would not feel trapped anymore.Thinking about going back is making me feel abit depressed. I have always wanted to do well in life and had lots of ambitions. I have always loved performing such as acting/singing but getting in the industry is too difficult specially with my luck lol. I will be moving in with people who I don't know and hope I get on with them. I don't want to be more depressed if things don't get any better. I suck at meeting deadlines and I can never adapt to a classroom environment. Nobody can be as lonely and have such a depressing life as me. I faced a lot of crap since moving but I can never let it get me down. I also had some a therapist to talk but it wasn't very useful.Uni never even crossed my mind when I left school and maybe I moved there for the wrong reasons. I also would like to work in childcare or working a a baby nurseor technical theatre working on the job. What I am going to do? I still going to join some clubs but still its like what am I doing.

These statements are self-defeating hyperbole. Hyperbole is never realistic. Don't indulge this kind of thinking-it does nothing to help you accomplish anything or understand your situation. If thoughts like this surface, discount them on move on to something that can help you instead.

A big difference with university is that you have to seek out the help that is available rather than having it come to you. Have you been pursuing this?
There is a lot of good information on the web that may be helpful.

http://www.autism.org.uk/studentsupportservices

This support is aimed exactly at people in your situation, so it may be helpful.

For a counter to the negative thinking you have been on the grip of, this Guardian piece might be interesting:
http://www.theguardian.com/education/mo ... rgers-cope

Even though you have already started, you might find these resources helpful:
http://www.autism.org.uk/18455
In particular,
http://www.dsa-qag.org.uk/Find-a-Disabi ... ficer.html



This is kind of a diverse range of goals. I have always found it helpful to focus on one thing at a time--reasearch it and discover what might and might not work with my particular strengths and weaknesses. Then I look at the steps I would need to follow to reach that position. Given a choice between pursuing three futures like this, that research usually makes the choice easier. It might be helpful to discuss these goals with you disability officer and university support team.

If you want to not be trapped and stuck, I would do everything you possibly can to make the most of the opportunities available at university.

Good luck!

Hi honey, I absolutely know what it feels like to be isolated. Given time it can get better. I wouldn't expect going to university to change you into a social genius though.

I don't know if you've ever had a day when you realised that you could put on a mask and it would be you underneath, but people would be interacting with the mask. I got through uni by strategically adopting the characteristics of a certain highly studious fictional character who will remain nameless.

I don't know if that helps or not.

Also, access support. I never did because the role I was playing would not admit weakness. That's one big regret I have from that time.

Best of luck with it!