I'm 98% sure that I have ASD

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I've known from an early age that I was very different from my peers, and not in the "everybody's a special snowflake" different. The most obvious clue was that I had this uncanny ability to piss people off without knowing what I'd done. When I did ask for clarification on what I did, their irritation seemed to increase exponentially, as if to say, "You little jerk, you know exactly what you did!" Up to that point, I always assumed that if someone were really a jerk, they would at least already know they were one, like the villains I'd watched on TV. I obviously suffered from social difficulties, but being socially awkward isn't enough to be considered ASD. When I look back, I can pinpoint several signs in my childhood which do seem to indicate ASD. Here's what they are:

-Hand flapping, pacing back and forth in a room, standing on my toes (became aware of this one after a girl asked if I did ballet) muttering words/phrases unrelated to each other, repeating said words/phrases, rubbing my eyebrows

-My teachers, friends of my parents, and even my peers would congratulate me when I made eye contact. They were even happier when I smiled (don't get me started with the smile people )

-My dad noted that I sometimes sound like Eeyore when I talk (flat affect?)

-Although I was walking early for my age, I was behind my peers in learning other childhood motor skills: tying shoes (anything with knots was a pain in the ass), swimming, riding a bike

-I became obsessed with seemingly random topics (in 5th grade, it was the Titanic. I still know the ice cream flavors they served! 6th grade, it was Beethoven-listened to his sonatas on repeat for hours). Never even heard about Britney Spears till a classmate squealed about her "awesomeness"

-Boy did I hate fire drills in school. I didn't give two craps about the actual possibility of a fire-the noise was scary enough to where even the alarms themselves looked scary. Also didn't care for the starter gun at my track meets and balloons popping at a church fair

-I regularly saw a speech therapist from kindergarten to second grade. It wasn't because of a speech delay, but rather difficulties with speaking in general.

I could write an epic novel about how lost I was socially (my fourth grade teacher even noted that I seemed childish), but I think the signs above speak for themselves. I do plan on discussing them with my psychiatrist, but I just want to make sure I'm not completely off base here.

Are you able to do what you want even with your lack of social awareness?

Not off base at all, but if you have a psychiatrist, then it's up to him to make a diagnosis isnt it? I mean we can say, yeah sounds like AS to us too, but that's just speculating. Anyways you sound interesting and certainly can relate to AS, so hope you stick around

Official diagnosis...make friends with it.

Being unaware of what you did to annoy people, doing hand flapping, walking on your toes, having trouble with eye contact...

Especially when people congratulated you for the eye contact...

Have you considered asking your parents if you'd been diagnosed as a child and nobody told you, figuring they wanted you to go as far as you could and not know something might hold you back?

Just your description on those few points make this non-professional's mind SCREAM "Yep! On the spectrum!"

You should investigate this, but here's a warning-
Don't let just ANYONE evaluate you. Make sure they specialize in autism.

Yes, they do speak for themselves, you exhibit more than enough of the diagnostic criteria to warrant evaluation for ASD.

However, be forewarned: A Psychiatrist, because they are licensed to prescribe DRUGS, is more likely to pooh-pooh your suspicions of autism, because there are no DRUGS effective for the treatment of autism. Rather, a Psychiatrist is more likely to insist that you merely have Social Anxieties, ADHD, etc., because THOSE things can be treated with DRUGS, and though it's technically illegal for Big Pharma to pay doctors to dispense their expensive prescription DRUGS, the DRUG companies find ways to offer "incentives" anyway.

You will probably have better luck seeking evaluation for an Autism Spectrum Disorder from a Psychologist, who has no incentive to be biased toward one diagnosis or another, and thus may be more likely to seek the truth, rather than a financial convenience.



^^I Second That Emotion^^ And specifically someone with experience in dealing with Autistic Adults, because the traits present differently in adults than they do in children. Those who only have experience with autistic kids may not recognize it in adults, because adults have had many years to learn to mask their autistic behaviors with coping mechanisms.

They've both confirmed that I wasn't diagnosed with any pervasive developmental disorder in my childhood. But even if I were suspected of having it, they wouldn't have wanted me diagnosed with anything. This is because my brother's teachers wanted him tested for AS and my parents (mainly my mom) were against it. They were afraid that a diagnosis would prevent him from getting a job and going to college. The possibility of the diagnosis holding me back concerns me a little bit, but I'm seeking one to provide me some relief and closure, more than anything.

To be honest OP it is cliche on this board to say you need to get a professional diagnosis to be sure.

I am 39 I came on here nearly two years ago asking the same questions and I was sure in my own head I had ASD.

March last year I got my official diagnosis.

My biggest mistake OP was to let ASD become my new obsession.

I have ASD so what?

This board has helped me succeed in my new job.

My advice to you OP and it has taken me two years to reach this conclusion.

Knowing what you have will allow you to drop the guilt for past difficulties in your life.
Taken advice on this board will allow you to do things better in the future.

My life has improved since I got my diagnosis it's not perfect but what is.

The reason why I hang around this board now is I want to try and help other people on this board they way they have helped me.
More importantly I like the vibe on this board and I feel I can come here for advice and every topic does not have to be about Autism.

I don't intend to let a diagnosis define me. I lurked on these boards for a while before I actually joined, which is what encouraged me to seek the diagnosis now. I already feel less guilt and anxiety over my past mistakes and can now think more proactively. I'm glad it has changed your life for the better and hope it does the same for me.

I hope it does the same for you too and judging by the tone of your post it will.

Get your diagnosis but also get on with you life.