Aspies younger than chronological age?

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For a long time I've known I was "younger" than I really am. It's always been there and continues to be.

Now I'm learning that it's another recognized element of Asperger's.

Once again, another arrow pointing in that direction for me.

Thing is, I don't know much about it. In one thread a diagnosed Aspie teen said he was 17 but is more like 14 or 15.

Is there any type of formula to figure, based on chronological age, what your...I dunno..."internal" age is, if you're an Aspie? Or does it vary from one person to another (no doubt along with degree of Aspie traits).

I've thought that my developement stopped or at least stagnated maybe in my early teens, and I've remained at that stage for years, but I don't know. Does that happen? Do at least some Aspies reach a certain "internal" (mental/emotional) age and then just stop, or is it more typical to be "behind", but continuing to "age", just with a delay compared to your chronological age? Any "official" stats on all of this?

Can anyone comment on this and relate anything they know about stats, personal POVs, etc.?

I felt as though my development stopped at my teens too.

I feel like my internal age is more related to how other people treat me than any condition I may or may not have. When I was a kid they babied me, so I felt like I was more behind.

Right now I feel like I'm 14 or 15 because that is how other people treat me. I also notice that people in that age group treat me like a peer.

I don't really think I have Asperger's or autism. I just feel like I was misdiagnosed. I think when people know about my diagnosis they expect me to act immature.

That effects the way they treat me. The way people treat me effects the way I act. I think I act and feel immature because it's a habit and people treat me that way.

When I act immature that just reinforces other people's beliefs and the cycle continues. I tend to act less immature around people who don't have this expectation of me.

Another thing that made me feel immature growing up is being gay. I wasn't attracted to boys like all the other girls and I assumed that was because I was immature. When I was twelve I noticed that I was getting more attracted to girls. I denied those feelings until I was fourteen. When I was fourteen I realized that I was right on schedule when it came to that stuff. That made me feel very happy.

I think there's something in what you say, at-least in my own experience. I often feel more like an intelligent 9 year old than my actual age of 21, though it's a mixed thing. I can hold down a job, manage money, keep my emotions in check as well as most adults so I guess you could say I am mature in some respects, but equally I have childish interests and honestly I'd rather play imaginative games with preteens than talk with fellow adults or engage in adult pastimes. I tend to think I have the intellectual capacity of an adult, but the emotional age of a child... no idea if that's accurate or not.

You sound for the most part just like me.

Before even finishing reading what you wrote, I was going to say to you "Holding down a job and such can have to do with intelligence and self-control; we're not talking so much intelligence here but rather the emotional age."

Your last sentence says it all for me, "the intellectual capacity of an adult, but the emotional age of a child". I've thought the same thing myself for a long time. The only difference is that I think I may be 12 while you say 9, so eat your veggies or I'll give you a noogie.

This sums up everything I was about to say about myself. Can run my life like a grownup (with some executive functioning struggles though), am intellectually fine, but I'm a child or young person inside.

You've heard of "Dog Years"?, (Heres a Dog Years calculater), well there's also "Aspie Years, Ive worked out that Iam not 55 at all, really Iam 32.

I find it more relevant to tell people how long Ive been on Earth rather than how old I am.

Then you have to factor in that I sleep a lot, you dont wear yourself out when you sleep.

Heh, I'd like to see you try

Yeah, pinpointing an exact age is hard and I wouldn't be surprised if it varies from Aspie to Apsie. I've settled on mine from observing from my work with children that I have peer-like relationships with 8 to 11 year olds, whereas older kids tend to irritate me and seven and below are more like little brothers and sisters. What I'm unsure about at this point is whether my emotional development is completely arrested at this stage or whether it's just much slower and will eventually progress... it'll most likely take years to be sure. I don't really care either way, I'm perfectly happy as I am now XD

Yes that sums it up well for me too I think.

That's how it is with me as well. I feel like 14 and 15 year olds are my emotional peers. 13 is starting to get too young. People in their 20s are my intellectual peers for general knowledge. For special interests my intellectual peers are in their 40s.

It's weird, but I feel like I'm 14 yo. Sometimes when I realise I'm already 18 I wonder: what happened to all those years?? I think that's because I compare myself to other girls, and by 18 yo they are independent, clever, have a strong identity and style, have lots of life experiences like relationships, sex, parties... While I like to watch cartoons, cry when criticized and continue completely naive. Intelectually speaking though I feel tons much older than them.

I am 30 yet everyone thinks I'm in my early 20s. Can't decide if they really think that or if they're just being polite about saying I look young.

I might have to disagree with this personally, since I actually feel several years older than how I should be feeling. On the other hand, people think I am younger appearance wise.

Sounds like stuff I've been told. Likely, they mean it.

I am in my forties but often times act. think. speak, perceive. and comprehend like a preteen or even younger. Sometimes I function at my chronological age but many times I function emotionally between the ages of 10 and 12 or around 4 or younger. Sometimes with things like executive function I can function around the range of 12 to 15 range or so. I also look 15 to 20 years younger than I am.

People consider my activities and I to be childish for my age. Many always have. I'm like a very smart 9 year old rather than a 13 year old, I suppose, although there is no specific way that certain age groups are supposed to act, so I don't really know what age I'm like, but it may be 9.