About this autism card

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What is this autism card people speak of?

I don't know what you mean. Are you talking about when people try to use their autism as an excuse like people who kill or hurt people and blame it on their disorder or use mental retardation to get out of crimes ? Or like that mother who wanted to kill her child because she was autistic ?Or they blame every single aspect of problem they have on their autism? I'm not sure maybe you can help me understand.

But for me I cannot even comprehend what it's like to not automatically labeled different or special or for someone automatically know there's something there before I even opened my mouth. I don't know why this is and I don't know if I'm exaggerating but that's just the way I see it. I don't know what it is do I have that ret*d or autistic look?

Is it because I walk slower and I look like I'm physically disabled in someway even though I don't use any thing like a brace? Is it because my voice is high-pitched and I'm always smiling or at least I think something like that maybe just that curiosity also they look I'm not really sure so I have that cute kid look?

How did my bullies know I was week? how did the people who pretended to like me and be my friend and possibly even pretended to be lesbian, I won't get into that now.Okay basically they said they wanted to have sex with me before I even knew what Sex really was.Either they were just pretending or I'm worse at sarcasm than I thought I was?

People will either see me as really handicapped or see me as a really smart physically disabled kid with certain strange things about her. My grandmother will see neither and just see me as a regular kid and wonder why I can't do 90% of the things my mom and she did when they were kids.

It must be great not to have to think about every second of your life and someone might be taking advantage of you and you may not even know it.

I'm afraid to have a friend that isn't from my camper special-needs program because the rest had either been nonexistent or completely horrible and mean. It must be nice to hide and Just ride around being smart. I can't trust anyone not even myself.

Please don't take this too hard and honestly I'm really curious to see what this autism card is. I don't mean to hurt anyone I never do.

I just wish that some people wouldn't be talking about this autism card like it's so easy to put away like it's so easy just to hide Who you are. Or to be able to get past nts disability detector when most of us at least from my experience can't.

I know what you mean about hiding it and if I could I probably would but while considering the circumstances in every situation first. But then again I wouldn't know.

But seriously what is it like to not automatically be labeled? I know it must be hard too especially applying for accommodations and trying to get disability.

I know I experience that well my grandmother is still when she applied and may be applying again if she hasn't completely given up for OPWDD that she didn't fill out the form properly but it's a different story.

Anyway I know that there are advantages as well as disadvantages and I would like to know that and options from different perspectives, abilities and functioning levels.

Thank you for your time.

Hi Jen - the Autism Card doesn't exist, it's a made up catch-phrase and is only used by the person who made it up. As far as I can tell its meaning tends to vary based on what will inspire the most outrage and start the most fights in any given thread. Oh and it's bad for humanity!

Wow, and literal me thought you were talking about the wallet-sized cards people show police officers and such to make them aware of the condition! Seeing wozeree's post though clears everything up.

Oh Im sort of starting to get it.but what I really mean is the concept of the card think the concept of telling people that you're autistic, or asking for accommodations were explaining your behavior or something like that. You know whoever started that dad about "playing the autism card."

Do you think that people notice your different once they first see you or do you have to explain to them why you sometimes act in a different way? Do you try to hide your autism embrace it or are just indifferent? What do you think the people automatically notice about me to know before I knew I was autistic or disabled?

That's hard to say because I don't know you. If I were to judge by your writing I wouldn't think anything was different about you.

I know what you mean though because I sometimes get the same thing from people, it seems like right off they perceive me as "the other." I can't even explain it for myself. I think you see that is the experience of a lot of people on this forum.

I think when and whom you tell it to is going to be a very personal choice for you. I used to always worry about being different, sometimes I still do, but much less than when I was younger.

I think for you it may be way different than it is for me because more and more people are becoming aware of what Autism is. I would guess that by the time you are old enough to enter into the work force, people won't think it's any big deal at all (of course, I may be wrong). I honestly don't think that Autism is that big of deal, I see it much more as a difference then a disability - but the way we are perceived because we are misunderstood tends to make the problem snowball out of proportion sometimes. So once people start getting educated on what it really is, that should be much better.

Also, I'm not one of those people who think people with Autism are superior to those who don't have it, but I do strongly believe that many people with Autism could do great things, but the prejudice toward them and the fear and "glass walls" that that creates can sometimes stop them from doing those things - like anybody else who is perceived as being different. So I hope that you and all the kids your age with Autism can better embrace who you are and enjoy life and do everything you can that you want to do.

Anyway, I've only ever mentioned it to 3 people and all three gave me a version of No you're not, you're just weird so I stopped talking about it! In the grand scale of things, it really doesn't matter for me if anyone knows about it - but if you need accommodations, you will have to tell some people.

I hope that kind of answers your question.

PS - standing up for yourself or speaking from your heart is not playing an Autism card nor is it any form of manipulation. People who want to silence others will always come up with some form of that same argument, but don't let em get you down!

I don't believe there's an autism card. It's been made up.

thank you. I honestly don't think I even have to mention it to people I might need to mention my needs are or Something more spific. but in general people already know although when I start to work I don't know if it'll be the same thing.

People often either as I could before over or under estimate my ability. For example I was telling one of my former teachers Who knows about me and my disability. that I couldn't volunteer in the Special Olympics because I would more than likely be the one to be in the special Olympics and that the other kids in my program going to Special Olympics and if I volunteered that would give them that would be weird to the counselors even though I wouldn't be of help anyway because again I would most likely qualify for it.


But if I guess if I could help even if I did qualify for it I most likely would. My teacher didn't seem to agree with the fact that I said I could qualify for it that I would be the most high functioning person there.I basically in nicer terms told her that's ridiculous especially with my physical impairment and other developmental issues but apparently she doesn't seem to get that. I was also trying to mention that honors classes should be like special-education the only difference is instead of the level being one high-level it can be varying levels and high to low to regular to more individual help to just leaving the person alone when they need to be alone or even other cases just using for a physical disability that can't be handled in a regular classroom it should just be for people who care about school.

Last edited by jenisautistic on 13 Jan 2014, 12:05 am, edited 1 time in total.

I'm not sure if this is relevant, but I'd like to tell you about my autism button. I wear it on my cap once every couple of months or so, if I'm going to a place where they recognize me and are annoyed with me. It works wonders.

It says, "I'm not ignoring you, I have autism."

I wore it to the grocery store, where I used to have a terrible time in the check-out and packing line, since it involves coordination. Often the people behind me are annoyed while I take too long putting my stuff on the runner, and then more so when I take too long packing it. Then one day I wore the button and the cashier saw it. Worn on my cap, it was just at eye level to her. She raised one hand to the other customers and they backed off, and she stood politely to one side while I packed my groceries, wished me a nice day and said goodbye. And nobody was mad at me.

Do I owe them an explanation? No, but I have a right to tell them they're wrong. Which is why I occasionally wear the button.

Same with walking my dog. About twice a year I wear the button and the dog-walking crowd relaxes. They didn't know why I was weird. I don't mind being weird and now they don't mind it either. I do resent being expected to be NT, but it's up to me to clear that up. I'm certainly not going to pretend to anything but what I am.

Note that I've judged the crowd before I enlighten them.

Aside from that, I do have a plastic card attached to my keys, just in case I run afoul of some authority somehow. It says I have autism and sometimes cannot respond.

Well I do have a medical alert bracelet that I never take off but I don't think anyone's seen it yet.

[img][800:768]http://i1013.photobucket.com/albums/af255/jenhug1/IMG_08681_zps93ee9482.jpg[/img]

Hey i got one of those bracelets too.

I think I know what you are talking about.
For me its blatantly obvious that i am autistic or otherwise neurologically impaired.
There is just no way for me to possibly hide that, "there's something wrong with that kid" factor.
And grown ups automatically talking to me like i was three years old.
But then maybe/supposedly there are high functioning people who might try hiding autism in some
situations and then bring it up in others - all depending on what is to their advantage.
A best of both worlds thing.

I have a couple of shirts that say "I'm Autistic, what's your excuse?"
Maybe I will have a button made with that.

I have yet to use it its in the garage gathering dust.

I hope I didn't sound like I hide or bring out my autism, depending on what's to my advantage. A lot of people think I'm an annoying NT. If I can correct that idea, then I get a chance to be my own lovable self.

sorry if it looks like am highlighting something pointless but woud just like to say mental retardation thankfuly was killed off as a label for us over two years ago and officialy killed off march this year, its not excused and its impossible to 'get off' for being learning disabled [US definition=intelectual disability] as we have a limited mental capacity and an entirely different thought process that can lead to the crimes or issues that our non ID disabled peers do.
we dont get jailed,instead we might get secure community care, get put into learning disability institutions [temperary placements known as assessment and treatment hospitals in the UK] and those with mild LD/ID who have comitted crimes get put into forensic hospitals-these are godawful units and far worse than prisons,prisoners actualy get stimulation every day unlike in forensic hospitals and those of us in A&T hospitals.

as for the autism card side of this topic,these are used to make people understand why someone is doing something but not to excuse, understand and excuse are two different things.

Jen, this is in no way to discount any kind of actual distress you are experiencing in interactions in your daily life, but this comment in the context of this particular thread (meaning your entire message) might be kind of an example of what I mean by playing the autism card. I do not mean by playing the autistic card telling people you are autistic or asking for help from others ((though it could be that, depending on the context) I mean more, as KingdomOfRats touched on, using it for an excuse in a psychological sense, so perhaps using it as a way not to feel something unpleasant, such as even facing the fact that one is different. It's kind of complex.

Quite honestly my writing on that thread where I am talking about playing the autism card is not designed with teenagers in mind. If I were writing on that subject for teenagers, however intelligent, and I know you are very smart, I would design the material much differently. When I first started writing to you I did not realize how young you are, partly from my own lack of awareness. just as I did not realize on your other thread Wally had this physical disability that is considered terminal, even though it was mentioned in one of the first messages and in the very beginning of the video. The video was so interesting to me my mind just did not focus on those things, when ideally I should have processed the material more comprehensively and done some research first. I still stand by what I wrote, but I may have written differently---such as asked you what was interesting to you about that video, or not written on that thread at all if I had realized this person was so ill..I suppose saying this could be considered making an excuse. but it is just an actual fact of what happened in my case of processing data, so it would not be playing the autism card. Now I have to be more careful in the future, though.

However, what I quoted above from you seems contextually different to me then the example I have given about myself. I do not want to get into a big discussion here. I have already explained in depth on my thread what I mean by playing the autism card, but that material was not designed with teenagers in mind, and I would not expect a teenagers to plow through that kind of material. Personally I would not allow a child of mine to participate on WP unless they were over the age of eighteen (and I could stop them:-). You are unique, though, and a special 'case' and a very special person, meaning by 'case' that' you are already here, and I welcome your participation. It looks to me that you are trying to sort something very important out for yourself and maybe not getting the help you need in your personal life to be able to quite do that, or maybe it just takes time. I hope you do find the answers you are looking for, and you do have a unique talent for starting interesting threads. I hope you will consider doing something that equates to this with other teenagers in your school or city or with your friends.. Perhaps you could start some kind of club....maybe an enquiry club for other teenagers like yourself who are struggling with these issues. Actually I recall there is some kind of resource for teenagers on WP. I will have to check that out. littlebee

Little bee you are right what you putting in quotes of mine had nothing to do with this thread and I apologize for that. Even though I still don't really understand what you meant by it being example of the autism card I understand what you mean sort of.

As for the rest of your post I might talk about this later but I agree with you on the age thing and I thank you for your compliments.

I decided to confess all the had destroyed me through out my childhood because these things I never told anyone else becides the people who had witnessed it. I don't know what I mean to accomplish by this but I just want to get off my chest. I figured that since it's almost going to be a year since I joined the wrong planet I should get everything out. If you know what I mean.

Also on my one year anniversary of being on WP I'm planing to do somthing special even though I'm not exactly sure what it is yet.


About my childhood and my past

Jen, you are wrong, your story and your comment that was quoted have every thing to do with this thread and this forum!! ! You started this thread and you have a right to speak your mind without apologizing to anyone. Whether someone welcomes your participation or not is of no bearing, you are a valuable member of this forum and nobody has any business "allowing" you to post. This is really a sad thing going on here and I hope that you can look beyond what this poster is trying to accomplish by chastising you for speaking out, then trying to compliment you to make it sound like it's coming from kindness. I hope you never let people like her silence you, it really makes me want to cry (and I'm not much of a crier).

Your story is very important - it's NOT an Autism Card. THERE IS NO AUTISM CARD!

THe horrible irony is that what's going on here is a perfect demonstration of why you have learned to feel this way to begin with:

It must be great not to have to think about every second of your life and someone might be taking advantage of you and you may not even know it.

But moving on: What are you going to do on your anniversary? It sounds exciting!

Claradoon - grocery lines are torture for me too! I always end up in some kind of disarray for some reason. I think the button is a great idea because when you calm the situation down for yourself, you help everyone behind you too! I doubt I could get away with it though - the main reason being that I have never been diagnosed with Autism.