Face recognition failure...total embarassment
I'd had an important reason for attending a public gathering this weekend.
My therapist turned out to be there too. We happened to pass in a crowd. He smiled and said "Hello".
I had no idea who he was, said "Hello" (and I KNOW he could tell I didn't recognize him), and moved on, only having it hit me who it was a few moments after it'd become too late.
No, I was apparently having NO sensory issues at all in the crowd. (I also have some swampland to sell you, if you believe that.)
He's going to want to talk with me about this in the coming week, isn't he?
Is this another arrow pointing to me being on the spectrum?
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AQ 31
Your Aspie score: 100 of 200 / Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 101 of 200
You seem to have both Aspie and neurotypical traits
What would these results mean? Been told here I must be a "half pint".
Although it's not a definitively diagnostic characteristic, a lot of people on the spectrum experience this kind of face blindness.
I have a very odd sort where I have what I call contextual face blindness (meaning that if I see someone in a context where I wouldn't expect to (particularly if I see a coworker at Target or something like that), then I won't recognize them at all).
This happens to me with movies/actors too where I will misidentify an actor that I should be familiar with and my wife can figure it out pretty quickly.
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Don't want the truth? Don't come to the park!
This. And not being able to tell characters apart in movies or tv shows if there is more than one person of the same gender with similar hair color.
I also might have "lost" my fiance while ice skating with him yesterday, when he was never more than 20 ft from me.
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__ /(. . )
happens to me all the time. I can't recognize people out of context.
I might see someone 5 days a week at work, but If I run into them at jewel, nothing! Not only do I not recognize them but if they identify themselves not only do I not recognize 'them,' as in the person in front of me, but it directly clashes with my memories of 'them,' the person in the context they belong, and I can get a migraine and once even a nosebleed (though to be fair I was particularly embarrassed and was playing it up a bit). I refer to this as "scrambling my reality matrix."
Edit: ok, thats too many of you for it to be a coincidence!
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AQ: 31
Your Aspie score: 135 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 63 of 200
You are very likely an Aspie
Last edited by buffinator on 09 Feb 2014, 10:15 pm, edited 1 time in total.
This. And not being able to tell characters apart in movies or tv shows if there is more than one person of the same gender with similar hair color.
I also might have "lost" my fiance while ice skating with him yesterday, when he was never more than 20 ft from me.
I can't keep tv characters straight if they look alike either, it gives me headaches trying.
This happens to me. Also, I wouldn’t recognize a famous TV or Movie personality if they were standing in line next to me at the store.
This too. I almost walked by my own Mom, because I was in a place that I would never expect to see her.
It makes me wonder if somehow the faces are “cataloged” in our brain according to a context. There certainly are advantages to cataloging information this way.
Yeah, I realized that the other day when I ran into my brother on the street near my house. My recognition process basically went like this:
- oh wow, someone said hello to me
- who would be here in my neighborhood?
- it's not my parents, they're inside the house
- I don't really know anyone else
- who else lives in this town?
- seems to be male, based on his voice
= my brother!
That's how I figured out who he was, and it had nothing to do with his appearance.
It's just simple face-blindness... you have trouble memorizing faces. It's a pretty common thing, especially in its milder forms, where you can still recognize people if you are very, very familiar with them (for example, your mother, or the friend you've had for five years).
It's nothing to be embarrassed about. Most people will accept an explanation like, "I'm sorry, I just really suck at memorizing people's faces." It can also help to avoid any insult if you make it clear that you remember the person themselves--like, comment on something you've learned about them, for example ask how their German Shepherd's obedience training is going, if they mentioned that to you last time.
I've tried telling people straight out that I'm faceblind and I might not recognize them, but so far, only one person has taken the hint and actually notified me of their name every time we met. And the stupid thing is, she has a distinctive haircut that I can recognize her by, which makes her one of the less problematic people. If I could just get those identical-looking young, pretty college students to tell me who they are, that would be great; they're the hardest to tell apart. No distinctive features at all, in many cases, and the hairstyles can be either identical (because of trends) or ever-changing.
Don't beat yourself up, though. That's just life.
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I have it too, don't recognize people out of context, can't identify movie characters, recognize people based on the hair etc
But I have the perfect excuse! I have sight problems so I sometimes use glasses other times I use lenses. If someone I know walks by me and I don't say hi, they get upset, so when they tell me that I tell them I didn't see them. They assume it's because I wasn't wearing glasses, even if I was using lenses
I don't usually tell people I can't recognize faces or them because most of the times they get upset ("she doesn't remember me!") or think I'm weird/exaggerating. So I think this sight excuse requires less explanation and is more accepted.
daydreamer84
Veteran
Joined: 8 Jul 2009
Age: 39
Gender: Female
Posts: 5,001
Location: My own little world
For me, if someone is wearing sunglasses that hide their eyes I tend to be unsure as to whether or not it is the person I know.
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We, the people on the Autistic Spectrum have a choice.
We can either try to "fit in" with the rest of society, or we can be so egocentric that we can't be bothered.
I choose the actor. I observe NT's. I listen to their socializing. I practice it, so in social situations I can just emulate/mimic what is expected.
It isn't natural for me, but it enables me to "fit in".
It is VERY tiring and draining, but at least we can appear like them even though it is an act. Like being on the stage.
They can't see it is emulation, and so we are accepted.
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