We are "socially ret*d"?

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No I am not socially ret*d, or socially awkward. I think it is more that I am socially naïve, somewhat sheltered from the way I grew up, and sincere to a fault, and more than anything I have a lack of interest in socializing. But I am usually graceful about it, unless I get in a really upsetting situation and lose my cool.

I am slow on the draw, and slow to process what is happening, but once I figure it out I understand things more deeply than other people do. I think I have plenty of social intelligence and ability, but it's just difficult to put it to use in a real-time situation. I get too discombobulated, and it's tiresome.

I must be socially and intellectually ''ret*d'' then compared to my NT peers, because I am not very bright.

Call it what you will - For me though, it's a bit like walking on hot coals. I don't want to do it because I won't enjoy it and I know I'll only end up getting hurt - and I don't want that - so I don't do it!

I also prefer misfit for a very obvious reason. Ray Davies said it well in 1978.

I hope I didn't cause any offence with that. If I can presume to judge your intelligence (or presume that I'm intelligent enough to do so) by skimming your recent forum posts, I notice that you are more eloquent and thoughtful than a lot of NT women I know of your age.

I wouldn't say you were dull.

Whilst it conveys information well, I would be hesitant to use the word "ret*d" because it encourages prejudice against the intellectually disabled.

Yes but I do feel like I only know the basics of everything. Yes I may be good with contributing to online message boards, but I feel I am quite bright emotionally. But I am not bright intellectually, I am just average to underaverage. I have never been better than my peers at anything. They even got better grades than me at school. And it's no good saying I'm clever in my own way - because everyone's clever in their own way. Even my cousin's friend's brother, who has intellectual learning difficulties, is very brilliant with making things out of wood without requiring any help. I couldn't even do that, and he's 6 years younger than me.

You'll have to try much harder than that, if you're to convince me otherwise.

Yes, I have social deficits and I can be really naïve. It's part of the diagnosis.

Not so sure, since the term means 'slow' not sure it makes sense....i am not 'slower' at socializing and its not as though I am just behind on learning social skills...plenty make ok sense on paper but are hard to actually implement in real life social interactions. I would however say my executive function/processing speed is ret*d

♢ Social non-participants or
♢ Non-participating Social Individuals
♢ Conversationally challenged

On a serious note: what is the problem with using the word "ret*d"? For starters, unlike some other derogatory words, it was never meant to be term of prejudice or insult. Secondly, the term used for those with Down Syndrome or other related disorders now is "intellectually challenged." So why can't we reclaim the word? It's a very good word, from the Latin "re" + "tardus" (slow). Words are very beautiful and have their own existence and history, much like people, and we just don't go around killing people (or shouldn't anyway).

"ret*d" still has a stigma attached to it. I don't want to be regarded as ret*d in any way, regardless of how wonderful the word is.

socially disadvantaged due to being a small minority.

Ditto!

Thanks for sharing that!

I don't think of myself as a social ret*d. However, I am very selective in what I say and who I say it to.

I think some people do avoid me because I'm so quiet, I can't blame them to be honest.

I think I'd feel awkward around me too.