informing employer when you are self diagnosed

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Anyone have any experience of this?

around a year ago my doc said she thought I probably had aspergers and referred me to a clinic to get a diagnosis but I didn't go along so remain self diagnosed.

Just going through a hard time right now, a lot of changes at work, redundencies for others, increasing workload, unpleasant director etc and I think my behavior is reflecting really badly on me and wondered whether to say something in confidence to HR. I am just not coping at all with a lot of things at the moment, anxiety levels through the roof and that seems to be making me quite depressed and withdrawn.

nervous that they simply won't believe me anyway but also that I shouldn't say something as I am not officially diagnosed.

No, don't say anything unless you are officially diagnosed. You will most likely be seen as a problem employee who is making excuses for their laziness or incompetence. I was lucky in that my HR director was great (even spoke to her outside work... imagine that!) and asked me once straight up "do you have mild autism?". Either way she told me they would need formal documentation if I needed accommodations beyond what was offered and where I work the accommodations are excellent anyway so there was no need.

Definitely go for the official diagnosis. Also, I would take advantage of whatever counseling benefits are available.

don't want any special accomodating done for me at all, just kind of what to say 'sorry if I have seemed like a d**k recently' and explain why. Not sure what good it would do though.

None. That's your answer right there. Sadly, most people are woefully ignorant of what "autism" is outside of movies or ridiculous stereotypes and you will be doing yourself a huge disservice by coming out without any documentation to legally back you up. Again, I know what you are trying to say but most people will just think you are just coming up with an excuse for being a jerk and refuse to accept responsibility for your behaviour.

I was 59 and at my last job ever when I learned about my AS/HFA, so I can only speculate about how helpful it might have been if I had been able to tell any of my previous employers. With my last one, however, and even though I was not having any actual trouble on the job in my one-man department, I just handed my supervisor a copy of a certain list of Asperger traits I had found and he quickly agreed it seemed to fit me.

If I were you, I think I would go to HR and report things just as you have mentioned them here. The HR staff is charged with training, maintaining and improving production staff just like mechanics take care of equipment -- human resources, remember? -- and I would suspect they will take the time to listen and at least try to help in whatever way they might be able even if that might include temporarily re-assigning you in a less-demanding position.

THIS ^

I strongly advise you to obtain an official diagnosis from a qualified professional (and get it in writing) if you want your employer to make accommodations for your behavior. Otherwise, you'll come across as only a lazy, incompetent whiner trying to avoid work.

see above, I don't want any accomodations made at all. Just feel that me being withdrawn, unhappy, quiet, seemingly unwilling to get involved in meetings/conversations, my refusal to travel abroad for 3 days recently etc etc are because of this and not because I am just difficult

You could apologize to anyone who may have felt negatively affected by your behavior (if you feel like you need to say anything). I don't think you need to talk to HR though, and I definitely wouldn't bring up Asperger's if you don't have an official diagnosis. You can say things like, "Sorry I've been out of sorts lately- dealing with all the changes around here has been difficult" without mentioning AS.

So ... you don't want your employer to excuse you from being difficult, traveling on business, being sociable, and from being involved ... is that it? If so, then get your resume updated, take all of your personal belongings home, and wait for the axe to fall.

If instead you want your employer to excuse you from these things, and still keep you employed, then your employer must make these accommodations for you. This will require a written "excuse" from a qualified medical professional.

As an employer, I've heard just about every excuse from others as to why they don't carry their fair share of the workload, why they are chronically late or absent, or why they are argumentative and confrontational toward co-workers. If they cite a medical issue, then they are required to either change the way they behave or turn in a written explanation from a qualified medical professional. This document goes into their personnel file, where it stays until they leave the company.

Not only does this protect their rights, but it also makes it difficult for the employer to not accommodate their medical needs.

Last edited by Fnord on 19 Feb 2014, 8:49 am, edited 1 time in total.

You're not officially diagnosed, so please don't tell an employer that Asperger's is your "excuse" for your behavior. If you don't want accommodations then why make an excuse for your behavior anyway?

I applaud your noble intentions and desire to apologize. But... I have seen similar workplace situations before. In the U.S. at least, doing such a thing can set in motion a series of actions/reactions that moves along on its own and that may work against you.

I go along with Fnord's comments above.

There is where you will do well to do some sorting of your own and begin learning to not make unreasonable demands upon an employer. As already said:

Those words might sound a bit harsh, but they convey reality. I spent most of my working life unaware of AS, yet I always somehow "knew" I was either burning out or using up all of my employment opportunities. If you possibly can, deal with that now rather than later when doing so will be much more difficult.

Not having an official diagnosis doesn't give you much ground to stand on. However, you can open the door of communication with your employer to help you deal with these changes.

First, figure out what is exactly bothering you and what you need from them. Do you need more/less structure? Are you having a problem with deadlines not being clear enough, or things aren't being explained as explicitly as you'd like? Whatever you need, write it all down in a list. Are these things that you need possible without interfering too much with doing your job? If so, you may need to look for a new job. If they are minor changes you need, your employer should be willing to work with you if they are a decent company.

Then, ask your supervisor if you can talk to them. You don't have to mention ASD, (and I wouldn't, since you're not officially diagnosed; they just wouldn't understand) but you can mention that you are going through a tough time in your personal life (and you can be as vague as you want on that- it's personal) and that you are committed to doing the best job you can, but you need some accommodations. Lots of people without ASD go through tough times in their lives and need accommodations here and there. It's part of being human.

If the referral is still good I'd go to the clinic and get evaluated or see if you can get another referal....or perhaps your doctor could write you a note that says they strongly suspect you have AS. Without some kind of documentation the employer could just think you're making excuses or something.

You're not self-diagnosed in the way many are. You're SUSPECTED of being on the spectrum...suspected BY A PROFESSIONAL, I might add.

While I agree you should go to be evaluated, you COULD say to someone "I'm suspected of having Asperger's Syndrome, a form of autism that allows people to function close to normal. There are still some issues, tho'. I could describe them to you..."

Others have said it might not be a good idea to say anything because you're not officially diagnosed. This is a valid point I can't really disagree with.