Is it possible to be a cool Aspie?

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Or do you think that is mutually exclusive?

I know of several aspies who I think are cool.
There is one newer guy on one of my forums who everyone including me thinks is very cool,
but describes himself as quirky and is in my opinion. There have been many times where have
wanted to say to him, "are you sure you're not an aspie?". And its like id still bet anything hes
somewhere on the spectrum. The thing that stands out most about him is that he is very nice.

Of one person who is an aspie someone said, "is weird, but a cool kind of weird".

And come to think of it, myself am considered cool by most on the forums, from what they say.
And again I attribute most of that to me trying to be very nice and pleasant to all.
.

Here I am.

Cool is subjective, my ten year old sister thinks I'm cool, not sure about anyone else

I'd like to think we're capable of anything, really, but define "cool"...

If we're talking about cool as in popular I'd have to say I don't know of any aspies or auties who are part of the cool/popular group. However I only know of one other aspie who I talk to regularly. I know of 4 other aspies at my school but I talk to the rarely and they are in a different year group to me so it's hard to say what social group they are in.

None spring to mind but I'll have a think about this one. Certainly your average Aspie isn't the life and soul of the party but we do have other advantages which may appear 'cool' in an NT's mind.

Honestly? Mutually exclusive.

Hmm, yeah I often don't agree with what many people seem to define as 'cool'... maybe that's because I'm really uncool I suppose 'cool' is what the majority finds cool, so as someone mentioned above, maybe the question is whether an aspie would ever been part of the cool kids/popular group in school/college etc. But often I find that the 'cool gang' are what society sees as cool, as in stereotypically cool with people who are loud and good at making lots of friends and conventionally fashionable etc. I actually find that quite boring - I am much more drawn to people who come across as more individual or unique with quirks, as to me that is interesting; to me 'interesting' and being a nice person is cool.

I have been told I am 'not cool' because I refuse to steal when someone has told me to 'be cool and daring and go and steal something from that shop'. They told me I was only refusing to steal because it was 'against the law'. On the contrary, I have no problem with breaking the law if it is for a good cause or I disagree with the law - e.g. if I was in poverty and had a kid and had to steal in order to feed the kid - I would do that. The reason I refused to steal just to 'look cool' is because I see that as wrong and pointless. The law is there for a reason because if everyone started stealing everything then the system would collapse, and that isn't beneficial. I see stealing for no good cause as selfish, and therefore not cool. I was also told I am not cool because I am unwilling to partake in risky behaviour like being in a car driving really fast. But, I'd rather be 'uncool' than risk a higher chance of dying prematurely or killing/injuring someone else.

Also, at school especially, people seemed to think things like smoking were 'cool'. I am fine with people smoking if it helps them cope with something and they accept the health risks and consequences, that is their choice, but smoking merely to look 'cool' I see as plain moronic, not 'cool'.

Yes, I think it's not mutually exclusive. My ex would be considered kind of cool although he's waiting for a diagnosis but he wasn't considered cool in school. I think it helps if you are attractive. The more gorgeous you are the less effort you have to make. And if you make an effort to dress nicely for your shape this also helps. People's attitudes change according to how you dress, and you can get away with a lot of odd behaviours if you look 'bangable'.

I don't have short hair anymore for instance though my hair is as easily managed as possible. I have barely any eyebrows and the seconds it takes to shade them in it makes up for the hours of peace and lack of disdain.

A couple of years ago, when I was trying to fit in, I learnt how to dress for my body and hyper obsessed about it. I went on and on about the details on my body and bored my social circle, to bits, they consistently denied I had any issues but then somehow in spite of the denials, I managed to dress for my body. Eg, they insisted I was wrong (and crazy) that I had broad shoulders but I do, and when I dress for broad shoulders, I get compliments. If I didn't have broad shoulders, the tips for dressing for broad shoulders wouldn't help. They can't see the details but I can. And I was told I need to have more self esteem when I started nattering on about all the bits on my body. It's not a lack of self esteem to say that I have broad shoulders jeeez!! !

I think when they think broad shoulders they think American football player but to me it's glaringly obvious and don't know how they can't see it.

Now I'm thinking about it, I wonder if Asperger has anything to do with body dysmorphia. I know there's a link to eating disorders for women. So maybe a couple of those in fashion might be Aspies.

I changed all my clothes and it doesn't take too much effort now to dress fashionably and I like colour.

Depends on who gets to define what "cool" is here.

Yeah it's possible. You gotta work at it, and you gotta do what you gotta do to make it work.

More Aspies should play sports, that's a big one.

A cool Aspie would be like dry rain.

My 19-year-old NT cousin thought my Autistic friend was cool because he hangs out at a bar what most youngsters like, and he's into celebrities and also enjoys football and supports the same football team my cousin supports. My Autistic friend does stim (as in flap his hands about a lot), but he also seems rather cool because of what he is interested in. I'm still debating to myself whether or not to arrange my cousin and my Autistic friend to meet one day, being so they both support the same football team and both like hanging out at bars.

Yes, a person on the spectrum can be cool if they work hard at it, which is probably what my Autistic friend done. I don't push myself hard enough like he does, but I bet if I did, I would probably fit in a bit more. It's just that I find it hard to force myself to like things that I am not interested in, like sports, celebrities and hanging out at bars.

That depends on your definition of the term, cool. What does being cool mean to you? Does it mean being into popular culture and sexual expression, or does it mean being brave enough to be true to yourself?

I think that a 39 year old diehard Kinks Fan who looks like Mick Avory, dresses in unisex Mod fashions and likes the 60s can be just as cool as an aspie who tries very hard to be NT and be a part of the NT culture.

My philosophy is that cool is a state of mind. You're as cool as you think you are.