Making Enemies

Post Reply New Topic

I'm deeply honored by the gift of life and its many blessings, and I welcome each day with open arms.

But sometimes, late at night, I'm struck by a feeling of emptiness... there's something missing...

I have a complete lack of enemies in my life.

This is not a recent development. The truth is, I've struggled to make enemies all of my life. No one has ever attempted to foil my plans. No one has left recordings of evil laughter on my voice mail. Not a single person has kidnapped my family members and held them hostage. Not ONCE has someone appeared out of the blue to recite a prophecy of my impending doom.

I guess I always just assumed that one day I'd meet someone who would grow to truly hate me, and that they'd harbor an unhealthy grudge that would blossom into an all-consuming, burning desire to make my existence miserable. But that never happened.

Any advice on how I can make enemies? Does anyone here have experience with enemies or perhaps even an arch-enemy?

Is this a joke? I had a number of arch-enemies in school to the point one told me he hated me and he would gladly murder me if he could get away with it. I even had a guy leave a death threat on my voice mail a few months back telling me he was going to put me "six feet under" for something I didn't do. Having two sociopaths who are highly skilled liars and conversationalists as enemies is NO fun at all and they can make you feel like YOU are the crazy one.

Having an enemy is a horrific thing. I see no benefit of having to live in constant fear for years. I don't have any enemies right now and that's the way I hope it remains. Maybe you meant having a rival but there is a huge difference between a rival/competitor and an enemy. Rivals are good, enemies are horrible.

Sarcasm? I don't get sarcasm....

I remember in school we would regularly refer to someone we didn't like as an enemy, but you never hear grown ups say it, even though the level of enmity possible between two grown ups is just as much, if not more, than two kids can have. Maybe it's an immature way to say you don't like someone and they don't like you back, but it's still a useful way to categorize someone, I think.

And yes, I know this is a joke thread.

I'm confused. And I am sorry, Mezzonite, but I cannot be your enemy as I already have an overabundance of them. In the future, may I advise you to get in line earlier. The best enemies go fast.

This is an ironical thread, obviously.

If we didn't have enemies, we wouldn't be as grateful to have friends!

Oh mezzanotte, I will be your enemy.

You have made me question if I have ASD now, since I seemed to get your humour, and that is enough for you to gain me as an enemy.

What is your kryptonite? As you know mine, it is only fair.

I can't help you I'm afraid I've never made enemies, my enemies have made me (in their tiny little minds whether I'm interested in playing or not) Usually out of being pig ignorant morons I've found. I wonder if they'd be even just a little bit offended and disappointed to know I don't give a f**k about them. They're behind me like a dog turd on the foot path I've stepped over. The weirdest is when you know someone doesn't like you but they still try to hang around and text you to hang out like a couple of old house mates I've had. That can be very confusing for those of us who are socially ret*d. Do they just want to keep their front row seat to the freak show? Meh. They can find another geek.

Denied.

My spies have informed me that you are headquartered in Australia and pose no significant threat.

I've kind of been dueling you with music - does that count?

That trunk....and those tusks,

Can really gore one's enemies.

^ Hannibal comes to mind!

Opera singers and elephants are quite formidable....

Rejected again apparently I'm no good as friend or enemy material. *Sigh* I'm going off now to research obsessively till my brain bleeds.