ASS-P wrote:
...This underlines how cut off

, by and large , I am from the " modern world "

, while still having the slightest grip mupon it , tantalysingly , sniffing from the outside

, while the " modern world " goes on

.
I have no idea how you would post a video on YouTube , even .
I don't even know how to download music !
And I can NEVER GET ANY HELP from anybody in finding out how to do things

.
have you ever expressed any enthusiastic interest in finding out how to do the things that you lament that you can not do?
i do not suppose that you can have a youtube account that is based on a library's isp address. i do think you could download music, but what good is music if you can not contribute to it and give it back somehow?
people are mostly interested in physical appearances and if you do not show yourself in your channel, then most of the people who only care about what you look like will move on, and only the people who understand what you are on about will stick around. if i had acid thrown on my face i would suddenly look very inferior to what i presently look like, and if my fan base was composed of those that liked my face, then they would disappear despite the fact that i still would say the same types of things that they thought they found admirable when they liked my face (before i had acid thrown on it or was exposed to a fire).
i know it would be very hard for you ASS-P. how much do you have to give? how valuable do you think it is? i am not talking materially. if i was in your situation, i would never be able to rest until i found a way out of it. how can you live the way you do? i guess i admire your strength because if i had to sleep in parks that were patrolled by police that fined people for sleeping there, then i may not survive for long because my ODD would invite a lethal reaction from anyone who had a problem with me just standing in a random place in the world. it is a shame that you can not come to australia to live. there are very many itinerant people who live in caves near sydney and they have a peaceful and happy lifestyle because no one wants to bother them. they get disability pensions and they can afford to live a comfortable life (with no trappings) without intervention or bother.
america seems to have too many people in it. no body really matters because there are 300 million of them, and so each person is 1 300 millionth of the population. how insignificant is that?
i also am insignificant in the scheme of things being 1 25 millionth of our population.
but everyone alive is seated firmly in their own consciousness and they have a firm and crystal clear concept of their concept of "me-nesss", and they have little concept of how dilute that sentiment really is (considering it is shared by everyone (animal and human) alive).
who knows? i am not good at philosophy on a non subjective level.
"good luck" i guess is the only thing i can think of to say with any genuineness even though it seems like a platitude.