Aspergers, race & feeling alienated

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In general, I find it easier to get along with people outside of my race... this might have something to do with me being into Asian culture, and the fact that other white people just don't get it. I don't feel particularly "white" either, I'd rather be considered Asian because I feel I can relate better to the cultures than my own, even though it's impossible to escape the way you were born...

Does anyone else feel this way or is it just me?

Maybe not quite like you, but many feel more comfortable amongst other cultures than their own. It's actually a fairly common ASD trait. That's why so many AS people travel, or relocate, to far off countries - a popular choice being Japan. It's easy for us to immerse ourselves in a different culture & get along with others, and others forgive our awkwardness assuming it's just because we're foreigners. It works out particularly well for people in Japan in part because the Japanese have a reputation for being so polite.

Nope, I don't really relate to any culture really. The art, music, literature and what not that I appropriate come literally from all over the shop. As for customs and social ritual go, I don't care for that much, I can't stand formality and regardless of the situation I like to push the boundaries to a place I am comfortable with. On a human level though I tend to relate with the underdog or outsider regardless of there background as we will always have much in common. I don't care for race, It's a silly concept.

Yea my mom who I suspect of being on the autism spectrum married a guy outside her culture, and then I married a woman outside my culture. My mom's brother did as well.

I was kinda like oh makes sense when I read it was common among ASDs.

Can't say I'm in the same position as you, but I am someone who would probably be considered mixed race as my mother is white Scottish and my father was black Sudanese, so I am fairly dark in colour, not white but not black, more 'brown'. However, my dad died when I was pretty young and I was brought up in Scotland by family here, so have nothing African about me other than features, and think of myself as Scottish, not because I have anything against other countries or nationalities, just because I was born there, brought up there, have never lived anywhere else or been in close contact with family on that side. At the same time, I sometimes think I don't fit in as people sometimes see me as different because of appearance, asking me where I'm from, not believing me when I tell them, etc. Also I worry that I upset people sometimes because I've met a lot of people who approached me to ask where I was from, I think because they thought it might be the same place they or their family/ancestors were from and then we could talk about it, but I probably disappointed them because I have nothing to talk about.
To be honest, other than what I mark down as my nationality on forms, I don't think I've found that I relate to any culture in particular. I haven't really travelled though, so I suppose I might not know.

I agree with all of this.

I think there is a way that it can seem slightly easier dealing with other cultures, as long as the contact is superficial, that stems from the degree of alienation that you feel in the culture of your family of origin. It is strange that you are an outsider in your own culture, but when you are meeting people from a foreign culture the degree to which you are an outsider because of autistic traits is masked by the degree to which you are outsider because your are not from the same culture. Being a foreigner can mask the "wrong planet" feeling.

But if you immerse yourself in another culture and begin to learn its ways in depth, you will soon find that you are still on the wrong planet after all.

And the people you deal with will gradually stop making excuses for your miscommunications based on your foreigner status and start realizing that there is a strangeness that is intrinsic to you.

Yep, some more perceptive individuals aren't fooled for a second

I am a product of my culture. I did marry outside of my culture and my race.

I learned: it's better to be yourself , rather than to try to "mold" yourself into conformity with the "acquired" culture

I used to try too hard, and I was not respected for it.

When I began to just "be myself," people from the "acquired culture" began to respect me more.

This maxim also applies to autistic/neurotypical relations, at least to a certain degree.

I feel that it's most of humanity that alienates me, it isn't just my culture, or my race... heck, this place must be called "wrong planet" for a good reason, that seems to sum up the sentiment behind my alienation, it's just so far beyond skin color or culture, it's more humanity than anything less.

Very wise. Tony Attwood says something similar about the danger of wearing masks.

I wish someone had taught me that when I was a kid.

Unfortunately mask wearing is sometimes something the "wearer" finds to be desperately necessary, ie, it sadly DOES work better sometimes, than just "letting it all hang out" and be oneself entirely, with all one's deficiencies. People who talk in such strong terms about how one must NOT wear a mask are being pretty damn judgmental about those who have found it was the only way to get through life in many instances.

Now....LOL...I'm not advocating stimming at work, and having meltdowns when a change is imminent at work.

Basically, I'm advocating meeting NT"s halfway, while NT's meet us halfway.

Sometimes, when necessary, I do "put on a mask."