moving

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I am moving soon. I have wanted to live on my own fro a long time. I do not want to ruin it my having tantrums. I will be living in a flat next to a person who can help. I will have 5 hours a day. from a support worker. It will be more independent by a lot. My support worker is even going to be starting with taking me on a bus to the library. 1 time a week. I like library's a lot. I am very happy about this.
But when I move house. I always start having big tantrums. I am worried I will ruin it. That they will say not any more for living on my own. If I start tantrums again. I have mostly stopped them for a year now. I only had 3 for a year. But if I move house I might have lots again. I was told I can not start having them again. But when I move I always start again. I do not know how I will stop them.

I hope that everything goes well for you. You deserve to be living on your own.

I'm more likely to have to meltdowns after moving, in the period of time it takes me to get used to all the new-ness. For me, it's caused by the stress of all the change, all the things I have to do to move, and all the things I have to re-learn/learn after I move. These are a couple of things that help me:

I try to become as familiar as possible with the new home before I move there: I go to see the new home in person and/or look at photos of it; I plan for where I will put some of my things in the new home using drawings; I walk around the new neighbourhood; I walk or take the bus along the routes that go from my new home to places I go to regularly -- like stores, doctor's office, etc. (I can usually walk around and take new bus/walking routes by myself, but in the past my mom would always do these things with me).

I try to imagine/plan for some of the everyday things I'll do in the new house -- because it will all look different, things will be in new places, and I might have to add or remove extra steps. So, for example I might try to imagine (over and over, many times) the whole process of making a peanut butter sandwich in the new kitchen ...or I might try to imagine (over and over, many times) getting up in the morning in the new bedroom and walking through the new hallway to the new bathroom to brush my teeth.

Do you know why you start having big tantrums when you move? I'm guessing that tantrums are like meltdowns and they happen when you get too stressed or overloaded? Based on that guess, I think that if you know/can figure out which parts of moving house are hardest and most stressful for you, maybe you can find ways to make those things easier or less stressful -- and maybe that would help you stop the tantrums.



Are there any things that help you not have tantrums now? If there are specific things that help, maybe those same things will still be helpful after you move.

Can you talk to anybody who supports you-- maybe ask them if they have ideas about how to stop the tantrums when you move, or if they can help you come up with a plan to prevent them? Maybe your support worker could help you?

we have talked about them. She said that stress is part of moving. I have to learn how to cope.

Did she suggest anything you could do to cope with the stress of moving?

Good luck, SkyHeart!

she said we will have a time table there. that will help. because it will be just me. So the time table will not change. living with other people. It changes a lot. then I get stressed. but there it will not.

That's good -- maybe this will be the least stressful moving experience you ever have, because you get to live by yourself this time. I really hope it goes well for you!

thank you