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Thom_Fuleri
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28 Jun 2014, 9:30 am

When I was a teenager, I seriously hated myself. I was skinny, wore dreadful clothes, had enormous glasses and struggled to make friends with people. I couldn't even look at myself in the mirror.

And then I realised that this was stupid. Why was I so down on myself? This was the only body I had, and it wasn't going to suddenly change. I stopped making myself so miserable about it and started thinking about what I liked about it.

I started to realise that, while it wasn't perfect, it was actually a lot better than I'd given it credit. Revising my clothing, a decent haircut and some new frames for my glasses all improved things enormously.

I now hope that my experiences can help others: http://freedom-muse.com/2014/06/02/i-hate-my-body/

How did the rest of you get over your body issues? Or are you still struggling?



SoMissunderstood
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28 Jun 2014, 10:13 am

Thom_Fuleri wrote:
When I was a teenager, I seriously hated myself. I was skinny, wore dreadful clothes, had enormous glasses and struggled to make friends with people. I couldn't even look at myself in the mirror.

And then I realised that this was stupid. Why was I so down on myself? This was the only body I had, and it wasn't going to suddenly change. I stopped making myself so miserable about it and started thinking about what I liked about it.

I started to realise that, while it wasn't perfect, it was actually a lot better than I'd given it credit. Revising my clothing, a decent haircut and some new frames for my glasses all improved things enormously.

I now hope that my experiences can help others: http://freedom-muse.com/2014/06/02/i-hate-my-body/

How did the rest of you get over your body issues? Or are you still struggling?

How I fixed my own body issues, was to concentrate on and improve those parts I could do something about and just ignore (or overcompensate for) those parts I could not (genetics, age etc).

As simple as it sounds (and I realise it does), if you are unhappy being overweight. watch your diet and exercise more. Nobody is going to feel any pity over that tub of ice-cream you just ate because you are depressed at being 'fat'...I believe they call it 'self-sabotage'.

If you don't like your hair style, change it! I ended up shaving mine all off and now I don't have to worry about that anymore *think Demi Moore in G.I Jane. At last and finally, I can be happy with it.

We don't need to compare ourselves to other people because each of us has both good and bad things about themselves they can be brutally honest about...for example, I have crooked teeth, frizzy, white witch hair (not anymore), sagging tits and a big arse, but I can tell you one thing, the strength in my upper body and thigh muscles is incredible and my body is still very sculptured and athletic for my age (yay for Yoga).

I am 165cms tall and weigh 62kgs. Even though I suck at most sports, I am a good swimmer and can lift heavy things that others cannot - maybe to make up for the fact I cannot do small, fiddly things for s**t.

Every time I go to the doctor in my hypochondriacal state, insisting on having 'every test out there' because I have anxiety...the doctors all say the same thing 'everything is perfect - in fact, you got the results of a woman half your age...tell me your secret?'

So now, I can look at myself naked in a full-length mirror and not feel so bad...I'm actually proud of my body and appearance, but I am definitely not narcissistic or obsessive about my self-image.

I just moisturise twice daily, drink 2 litres of water daily, take vitamins and eat more fresh food and I'm taking up bushwalking again (during the winter months until the pools and beaches all re-open in summer).



Dizzee
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28 Jun 2014, 10:31 am

I hate my body. Probable the biggest reason of my inconfidence. I blame my parents and genetics for it.


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DukeJanTheGrey
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28 Jun 2014, 11:02 am

I am not unhappy about my physical appearance but I am not satisfied either. This though is good as it pushes me forward to make improvements. When I look back at how I used to look not that many years ago, the difference amazes me and I am just thankful for progression. I have taken up a challenge to quit alcohol for a month, I am hoping I see and feel an improvement in that short time as I drink far far too much (it's not great for my mental state either). I am doing this to please myself, I can't change what others think of my appearance, regardless of what I do.


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League_Girl
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28 Jun 2014, 11:11 am

I hated my boobs and the fact I wasn't as skinny as other girls and the fact I had stretch marks. Now I don't hate my body as much and I have a different body type and I did lose weight but I was made to have curves than be a twig. Boobs, at least cute tops and dresses still fit me and stretchmarks are hard to see.


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I have a quilt of labels. I had a language disorder and a speech disorder. Then communication disorder NOS. My other diagnoses have been Language Processing disorder, dyspraxia, SPD, OCD, ADD, Asperger’s, anxiety disorder, adjustment disorder, anorexia nervosa. My mom’s labels of me are: eating disorder, anorexia, social anxiety, PTSD, just being sensitive and having the victim complex when I was a kid. And of course she says I’m normal and says the only thing I had as a child was language. Huh? I must have been a shitty person then and maybe a difficult child I was who had to be labeled because of incompetent school staff and mean kids who didn’t accept differences and because I was trying to be “normal.” :/

My blog: https://mynoneabdlthoughts.wordpress.com/


Kiprobalhato
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28 Jun 2014, 11:38 am

i hate how my arms are extremely skinny while i have a pudgy abdomen. i have been working on this for a bit, though, and i plan to continue doing so.
while i'm not that tall by absolute standards (5 foot 10 inch,178 cm) i've always gotten comments about my height, especially by my family.
i can jump from feeling really confident to feeling not confident...but i don't want to obsess over it.
i could use a smaller nose though... :pig:


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Jacoby
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28 Jun 2014, 12:15 pm

I try to keep things in perspective, most people aren't supermodels and when you get away from the tv or computer screen you realize that pretty quick. Going to Walmart does wonders for my self esteem lol.



ScottyN
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28 Jun 2014, 2:22 pm

I was into bodybuilding for quite a number of years. It made me less skinny, even after I quit. Now, I am satisfied with how I look. I still try to keep my body in shape with hiking, cycling and swimming.



Moonranch
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28 Jun 2014, 7:49 pm

I have severe body image problems. I have no idea how to get over them.


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Thom_Fuleri
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01 Jul 2014, 2:52 pm

Moonranch wrote:
I have severe body image problems. I have no idea how to get over them.


Start by identifying exactly what the problem is. Do you have a specific area of your body that you don't like? Is it too big, too thin, too spotty, wrong colour? When we know what we want to change, we can take steps to change it.

It could also be a general trait (too fat, too thin, too short, too tall...) rather than a specific body part.

If you can't identify a specific problem, it isn't really your body you dislike at all, and no amount of dieting or surgery or anything like that will make a jot of difference. In this case, your battle is with your self-esteem, not your body.



Rigor
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02 Jul 2014, 12:21 am

I'm overweight, have misaligned teeth, noticeable acne, and an embarrassing, disproportionately large set of man tits.

Are you saying that this is all in my head and that I'm actually Channing Tatum???



KindOf
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02 Jul 2014, 1:40 am

I hope your story helps some people out.

I used to be down on my body because I believed it was just another reason for people to shun me, but that improved with time as I talked to people with various body shapes, hair styles, facial features, and more. The people who are hung up on whether or not someone wears glasses and the size or shape of a body that's cared for are the ones with the problem.



tarantella64
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02 Jul 2014, 2:37 am

Thom is totally right. It's the thing that keeps you alive and makes you you. You should be nice to it, it's your friend. Don't hate and abuse your friend. Take good care of it. And don't listen to anyone who talks s**t about your friend, they don't know what they're talking about, because it's the best friend in the world to you.

If you actually take a step back and look at people, we're hella similar. Some a little fatter, skinnier, taller, shorter, more muscular, whatever. But basically the same. The extent of the craziness people have over these minor variations is totally nuts. Keep your bod clean, take it out walkies, feed it nice, give it rest, you know, you'll be much happier.

I'm going to be 50 soon. FIFTY. As in years old. That's a ridiculously long time to be alive. I started doing sports when I was a kid, and unlike most people, I kept doing them as I got older. Just ordinary stuff, running, biking, swimming. I didn't have a car for a long time, got around on foot, worked physical jobs. I still walk or run the few miles to work most days when the weather's not awful. And I eat more or less the same stuff I have all along, never built my life around food. Result: happy, healthy body. Am I about to model bathing suits, no, but why would I do that? And I don't look like I'm 20, or 30, or probably even 40. I look like a tired aging woman in good shape who's been working hard for a long time. Things sag and wrinkle. That's fine, they're supposed to sag and wrinkle. My belly sticks out. (Of course, it also did that when I was ten.) I can also run a sub-8 mile and don't take any drugs regularly.

Every once in a while I remember that a lot of women wear makeup and color their hair to hide the gray. I haven't done those things in maybe 15 years. Worlds have not collided. People still talk to me. Some even kiss me.

Please do not waste good life feeling bad about your body. Just take care of it. You have nothing to prove to anyone.

ETA: The young don't know this, but everyone who is young is beautiful. Your grandma isn't kidding.



persian85033
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02 Jul 2014, 8:56 am

I hate everything about me.


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LupaLuna
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02 Jul 2014, 9:16 am

I used to hate my body when I was in school for all the wrong reasons. Long before I knew I was dealing with autism. I was always that skinny nerdy/geeky kid who was all brains and no brawn and that made me an easy target at school for bullies.