I don't think I have Asperger's... anymore?

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I was diagnosed when I was 13, I think (I remember getting my brain tested or something), I only found out about it last year, though. I have also been diagnosed with Major Depressive Disorder and ADHD. Since the beginning of this year, I have developed a lot as a person, all by myself. I now respect and am nice to my classmates, speak to them, make eye contact, am (even more) polite, and well, empathy. I never freak out, I am always calm and speak civilly. However, I still have a lot of difficulty speaking, I guess. In no way can I speak out loud in class or do a presentation of a school work, speak in public etc.. So maybe it's not that I don't have Asperger's (losing Asperger's is impossible, right?), but that it got less severe? Or is this just my meds in action (ritalin and risperidone)? My meds have always been in action, though. Maybe I just became more mature. I don't know, what do you think?

>Engaging in one-sided, long-winded conversations, without noticing if the listener is listening or trying to change the subject
I'm not like that at all.

>Displaying unusual nonverbal communication, such as lack of eye contact, few facial expressions, or awkward body postures and gestures.
This is somewhat true.
>lack of eye contact
Yes, that is true, however, I do not have any difficulty with making eye contact, I can easily make eye contact and it doesn't disturb me at all, I guess I just FORGET to make eye contact.
>few facial expressions
I'm not sure. I usually have a frown on my face. But that's because I'm depressed most of the time. I really don't know about this one, I'd say "no" if I had to choose.
>awkward body postures and gestures
I do have an awkward body posture that I maintain on purpose because I have a problem on my chest that I like to kind of hide so I don't maintain the normal body posture only because of that, but I will soon, when I get my problem fixed later this year through surgery. Awkward gestures? No.

Showing an intense obsession with one or two specific, narrow subjects, such as baseball statistics, train schedules, weather or snakes.
No. I really like the English language and I learned it by myself as I grew up in a non-English speaking country. I speak it like it's my mother language and think in it, but I know other people who do this and they're NT, my NT friends. I am not obsessed with it and I wouldn't even like to work with it as a job, if I was obsessed, I would. And I like African-American culture too, like every other person likes something.

>Appearing not to understand, empathize with or be sensitive to others' feelings
I am literally the opposite of that. If there is someone that is the opposite of that who I know, it is me. The complete opposite. If there is somebody who understands, empathizes and is sensitive to others' feelings, THAT IS ME.

>Having a hard time "reading" other people or understanding humor
Nope.

>Speaking in a voice that is monotonous, rigid or unusually fast
Monotonous, yes.

I think it's a slippery slope to believe your Aspergers to have caused all your troubles in childhood; be careful to grant special attention to recounts in which you made important conscious choices, I've been told before by a good friend that I no longer seemed autistic, but that certainly wasn't how I felt...

Ah, nevermind this, f**k this, I'm an aspie, I can't speak loudly in class and have difficulty socializing, gotta face it, I'm an aspie, s**t, but I do NOT lack empathy, f**k no

I think it's more that our relationship with emotions and humor are different. Not that we don't care or are incapable of laughing.

I'll be laughing at 2 AM at random stuff online like it was the funniest thing ever. Then in public I'm sometimes uncomfortable because there is a pressure to laugh and join a certain wave length. Doesn't help that with stuttering I couldn't tell a joke to save my life. So I feel awkward laughing without bringing humor to the table myself.

And as far as emotions... the depth of emotions I feel is often staggering. Maybe I don't express myself well and I have troubles with relationships. But this heart is working and capable of love.

Compared with my experiences and those I have met, I would say that you do not have AS. Possible social anxiety though.

Sounds to me like you're subconsciously appearing more "normal". Weirdly, I started doing this around the same time I started taking drugs. I think they opened up more possibilities to my brain. But they've served their purpose and I don't need or want them any more

Probably not your meds. Ritalin and risperidone don't treat Asperger's directly. Ritalin is a stimulant, which helps people with ADHD regulate their actions more easily. For people with AS, Ritalin can help you with executive dysfunction, such as switching from task to task. Risperidone is an antispsychotic; for autism it is used as a tranquilizer, essentially to sedate or calm people who tend to have explosive meltdowns. Neither medication makes you less autistic.

What does happen, as a person gets older, is that we learn how to cope with autism more fully. The child who at three was not speaking, may be making simple requests at five, answering complex questions at nine, and engaging in spontaneous conversation at fifteen. The five-year-old who did not know other people's feelings could be deduced at all, might at ten years old understand how to read obvious facial expressions, and by fifteen be able to read some body language. Autistic children often go from not being able to use the toilet, to being able to keep themselves clean, to being able to manage a household in adulthood.

Sometimes when someone progresses so far that they are no longer disabled, we call it a "lost diagnosis"--that is, this person doesn't need a diagnosis any more, because he doesn't need help, and so we can't quite call him autistic. (Neurologically and culturally autistic, yes; diagnosably autistic, no.) Not everyone progresses that far; in fact, most don't; but everyone does progress. We learn things as the years pass, things that make us more independent. Sometimes those things make us seem less autistic, too.

More info on me is that my IQ is of 135 and I can read facial expressions and gestures perfectly.

I believe that we really do change neurologically as we grow up. I also believe that people with Asperger's can learn to mask it. I find it hard to believe that your AS has changed very much in 3 years. Maybe you're just coping better? Maybe you're processing facial expressions cognitively?

Misdiagnosis is entirely possible; the assessment of one specialist may sometimes be based on factors that are specific to your state of mind at that particular time or place.

At the same time, I agree with Callista and seaturtleisland that growing up and learning how to cope with the world around you factors in significantly.

It is perfectly possible to be on the autistic spectrum and not display all the symptoms. Displaying all symptoms is not a requirement according to the DSM (there's a set minimum number in order to 'pass' for any of the spectrum disorders).

Only two aspie characteristics I believe I have:
-Difficulty socializing
-Poor motor coordination
Do you guys think I'm an aspie or not?

^^^ I don't think so, but I'm no expert! ^^^

Last edited by ImAnAspie on 19 Jul 2014, 5:04 am, edited 1 time in total.

I suggest you ask some people you know in real life, your perception of self is filtered through the brain you have(whatever type that is) and then uploaded here, so that kind of defeats the purpose of asking here.

Good for you.

So... Nearly a week ago I sat down with my dad and we talked about Asperger's, and turns out he actually agrees with me. He thinks I'm not an aspie, not only him, but also my stepmother. He mentioned the possibility of taking me to another city to see the best specialist in Asperger's in our country, but first I have to talk to my therapist and psychologist. They'll see that I have been misdiagnosed.

I understand what you're going through.

It's extremely hard dealing with this grey line which is created by being high on the spectrum, closest to normality.


When I learned to better socialize and overcome my vices, I felt as if I was never restricted to begin with... But then I realize again, while I've improved, that I still am sub-par to say the least.