"Absorbing" friends personalities

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Last year I noticed that I seem to absorb the personalities of friends who I am spending a lot of time with. I noticed it at the end of my uni placement year. I had spent 10 months spending most of my time working closely with another placement student, I liked her and although things were a bit awkward at the beginning we soon began to get along well. When the placement finished and I returned home my mum commented that I seemed very different, and upon reflection I realised that I had unconsciously been mimicking her behaviour, humour and accent. I noticed that I did the same thing with my house-mate this last year.

Does anyone else do something like this, or know of someone who does this? Is this normal?

When I was a child I had one best friend who I intentionally mimicked in order to get along with other people, to the point that by the last few years of primary school people commented that we practically identical in behaviour and personality (our personalities were actually hugely different) but I stopped this when she joined a group who bullied me in secondary school, and haven't intentionally mimicked a specific person since... it was a shock to realise that I've been doing it without realising.

I have been known to mimick the mannerisms of the people I speak with. Not so much that it is apparent to them, but my friends say they notice a slight change in my behavior that comes close to resembling the person or people I speak with.

However, the less I know someone, the less I mimick, even if their behaviors are stereotypical. I guess I need to know someone a little bit before I mimick them. Then, after I know a person long enough, I decrease my mimickry.

I don't, but I'm interested in other people's interests - which helps obviously not only with NTs, but with Aspies too! I never turn down a conversation by saying I'm not interested, that way.

I do to an extent mimic the mannerisms and speech patterns of people that I like. I think I do this in order to come across more natural, paradoxically though this may sound. I haven't had a lot of practice in social interaction in my early twenties and late teens to begin with, so I like to use bits and pieces that I see other people use, so that I can help myself out that way when interacting with other people.

I've mimicked people my entire life. My mother tells the story of when I was about five and a man with a hairlip came to visit. I spent the whole time he was there with my mouth twisted up on one side! She was mortified.
I've mimicked people for so long, I'm not even sure who I am anymore.

I've noticed this, and have read that "aspergers people are often good mimics" in articles written by NTs. I wonder though if this is a natural talent (as it is usually presented in those articles), or something we do, consciously or unconsciously, when our self confidence has been so wounded by others' negativity toward us (put downs, namecalling, bullying, social exclusion etc) that we lose the inner confidence to be ourselves, and mimic in order to limit further damage and the emotional pain it causes.

I can think of twice in my younger life when I did mimic people I regarded as friends and really trusted and admired. The first time I wasn't really conscious of doing it; the second time, it was a deliberate strategy as she had skills in communication and negotiation that I wanted to learn and become competent in, which I was severely lacking in. It did help, though I found I was starting to mimic much more than that, her personality, her accent - looking back, I can see that I didn't just want to be like her, I wanted to be her. I did get past that after a year or two, and the whole experience was positive for me overall, it did help build my self-confidence and ultimately helped me to be a better, more capable, version of myself. She was a valuable mentor in my life.

I've caught myself doing that too. I use the same words and inflection when I buy stuff that I heard my mom use. I still behave in the same way I copied from my best friend back in high school when someone tells a funny story.

My husband has even commented on my copying the behaviour and mannerisms of characters in films and TV shows that I identify with.

I like your spirit, Bun.

I am not a joiner, so I am usually on the outs b/c I don't absorb personalities - but it is probably a good survival. I also am not a good imitator. But I also find people fascinating and I like to try to figure out their MOs. I guess anthropology is a hobby...

Raleigh: "I've mimicked people for so long I'm not even sure who I am anymore" - I also feel a bit like this, since noticing this habit I spent ages trying to figure out what was my personality and what was other peoples. I eventually came to the conclusion that everyone is influenced by others to an extent, and had to except that if I've absorbed something to the extent that it's a part of me, then it is me.

That's an interesting thought. I know when I was a child mimicking my friend who was very well liked was a deliberate attempt to also be liked, as I was teased pretty much from the beginning of school. I put a lot of effort into being like her, and although having her turn on me was very painful I think that copying her was very positive for me, and helped me cope with the teasing I experienced at primary school and build some self confidence. I do suspect that unconsciously mimicking people now is probably a result of having that self confidence crushed by the constant bullying and social exclusion I experienced during secondary and high school, and a coping mechanism to deal with the resulting social anxiety.

In high school junior year I had a friend who was a girl, and she was basically my only friend so we hung out a lot. I started behaving a lot like her without thinking about it, and people started commenting that I was acting weird. And this was kind of a problem for me, because as a male I didn't really want to be acting like a girl; her slightly hyper and weird personality worked for her, but for me it made me look (and feel) crazy. I did the same thing the next year, I had a friend and by the end of the year I was almost a copy of him in the way that I talked, the things I said, I even walked the same way he did (which was good for me actually because up to that point I always walked in an awkward way).

Mimicker here. Not all that bad or often, but I do have to watch myself. I see it as a strategy I adopted early in an effort to fit in with others.

I definitely do it... It was first commented upon, when I was in middle school.. I always seem to take the mannerisms, humor and personality of others whom I am around. Recently, I have found that I use my sister-in-laws made-up words when I am not around her.. I think it might be a fitting in thing that even NT's do, but we might especially do it... I know that I am like a chameleon around other people.

^^ This. If whoever I hung out with was more generally socially accepted than I was, I learned that acting like that person was a way to gain better social acceptance. Problem is, as many have commented, it changes based on who I'm hanging out with at the moment. Not only is it exhausting, it makes it really awkward to be around more than one person at a time!

I knowingly mimicked people that were accepted by others through out all of school. I would have never had friends today if I wasn't mimicking, but I'm trying to stop it now.

Three years ago I was at a party and I was friends with three entirely different people that coincidentally showed up at the same party. I assumed mimicking of the two friends that only had one thing in common. But it was a connection I could use for conversation so I used it. Friend number three shows up, completely disagrees with the conversation, then expects me to side with him. I attempted to mash together all the opinions into an agreeable neutral but It couldn't be done. I took forever to answer, coming across as a liar. I tried to back track and explain my action, making me further look like a liar. I slipped away and melted down at home because the energy and concentration required to pull all of this off was exhausting.

The long term results of mimicking 24/7 for myself was that I found I didn't know what my own opinions on things were, and that I really didn't know what I liked anymore. Basically whoever I hung out with determined what I liked to do that day, and living like that makes me miserable inside. I only mimic a bit now, and its not nearly as extensive as I used to do. Unfortunately I have yet to develop new tools for social grace that work as well as mimicking. Basically ever since I stopped mimicking, I haven't acquired any new friends, and loosely maintain the old ones with a visit every two weeks. I've lost most of my friends over time as well but the ones I'm keeping are definitely more genuine.

Sorry about the wall of text.

I once (in my early 20s) had my closest friend call me a chameleon because she noticed that I acted differently around different people. She didn't mean it as either a compliment or an insult; it was more of an observation, but she did ask me why I did that. I had no idea I was even doing it, much less why.

I started trying to observe myself, and found that my friend was correct. Since I couldn't seem to "fix" that tendency in myself, I spent the next couple of decades simply not having more than one of my friends around at a time. (It was not that hard to do, since I've never had oodles of friends - usually just 2 or 3 close friends, and a dozen or so acquaintances at any one time. And I HATE going to parties.)

I think this is one of the reasons I don't like meeting new people - if I like them, I will tend to mimic them (isn't there a saying: "imitation is the sincerest form of flattery"?), and I am trying not to do that. I'm finding more and more that I'm just not comfortable with anyone who is not already a lot like me, because with those people I can "be myself." Unfortunately, those are few and far between.

I hate when new co-workers join my work unit......

The one thing I notice is that my laugh is always changing. at the moment it's an exact copy of how of one of my work colleagues laugh. I've also picked up a few mannerisms growing up watching David Tennant's Doctor Who as well. We're like speech chameleons!