Everyone has it??

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My best friend has said that to me also.

As a diagnosed adult I have a pattern of failed relationships. I miss social ques, Stubborn and being rude. Bad eye contact and not really listening to people.

NT's problems...but amplified.

Here is a good story.

My Ex GF with Asperger's makes these strange noises when she is focuses. Me during my pre diagnosis stage not even know I had AS do these sounds like a windex spray bottle on rapid fire! She hates that noise. Her noises makes me stare at her and I try to mimic her. She then stares at me when I succeeded. I think she was getting annoyed, I really couldn't tell. great times.

Now do NT's have those kind of stories.

Dilnger, you know what's funny? As I read your post I was trying to figure out how Windex sounds when you spray it on a fast moving fire. And I was thinking were they trying to put the fire out with Windex? Then after some thought I realized maybe you mean when you spray it fast like if you squeeze the trigger fast. Is that what you actually mean?

We might as well say that we all have Dementia because we forget things at times. Some people have a terrible memory, but definitely don't have Dementia. It is so subtle and complex, that it cannot be explained in words by some average-low-intellect like me, but if you just try to imagine what I mean here then you can see what I mean by Asperger's too.

LOL!! ! That is a great analogy too.

LoL, thanks Joe 90, I like that analogy too. I dont want to be precious or possessive about being diagnosed, but I sort of feel that if we all have it then why have i failed so badly at so many basic things. Am i really as lazy and incompetent as i feel. If everyone has AS then i must be a shockingly incompetent human being

I feel the same about the Aspergers. I can relate to much of what others say on this forum but have never been diagnosed by a doctor and can't bring my self to tell people I think I have Aspergers without the official diagnosis. I still don't really know but I do know that I am very different to most people and have found comfort in sharing my thoughts in this forum. For years I was called weird and nicknamed dopey at school so I just accepted it.

andyfzr, i know what you mean, i was very reticent about sharing my suspicions with anyone. One or two people had suggested it in semi-jest but it was only after i had been formally diagnosed that i really had the confidence to tell anyone

Yes it was my counselor that suggested Aspergers to me but I never pursued it as I hate going to the doctors and the more I think about it, I just feel daft asking him but i think i do need to find out for sure if I can make myself go and see the Doc about it.

As long as you are comfortable with your diagnostic status that is what is most important especially if you live in the US where a diagnosis can average between $1000.00 to $3000.00. Some have been very lucky to get it for much less depending on resources available to them in their specific locations or to their insurance plans but in the US it can get very very expensive and the benefits you can get as an adult might not be worth the expense of the diagnosis to you. But you are the only one who can decide if you are comfortable with or without one. Everyone has specific reasons as to whether or not a clinical diagnosis would be beneficial and here we try to respect whatever the person decides for him or herself. But what matters is how you feel about it and how it can help your life either way. But I am really glad that you can come here and find people who relate to what you are going through and we will support you whether you have a diagnosis or not. We will support you whether you are on the Spectrum or not. As long as you find comradery here, that is what matters.

This is kind of my issue when people self-diagnose even though the symptoms they have are hardly impairing..Why would you even want to attribute autism to yourself in any way unless it has had a huge impact on you? These are not traits that I exhibit on occasion but do well enough the rest of the time; these are traits that negatively impact my day-to-day functioning not just socially, but in nearly every way. It's not a comforting thing to say to people on the spectrum. Try struggling with tasks that you should have been able to do independently as a child every day of your life, and then come tell me that you think it might fit you too. This is part of the reason I do not tell people, because it's not like it's any of their business.

A counselor that I talked to about this very issue told me that people try to get diagnosed or get their kids diagnosed for the benefit check. It's not a lot of money but they still try. So she said that it is harder and harder to actually get diagnosed because of the clinicians are aware of that. That makes it very unfair to the people who are actually suffering and need the check because they can't work enough or at all in order to sustain themselves.

I don't know how widespread fraud, excusing making, trendy is etc. . At this point whether it is or is not overdiagnosed almost does not matter. The perception that it is, is what matters. That is one reason the DSM took the Aspergers diagnosis and the ICD will probably follow in 2017. Most of the rise has been in diagnosis has in the Aspergers area of the spectrum. I strongly suspect it is an easy scapegoat. The result is what you see here. Instead of accepting their ASD and dealing with it, people legitimately on the spectrum are wasting time and energy wondering or believing that they are are fraud. It is hard enough being a small minority, we certainly don't need this. It is not these peoples fault. How can you not internalize this message when they hear these negative messages from family, friends, professionals and on Wrong Planet?. It seems likely in this climate that that the amount people un or misdiagnosed is probably going up.

We in autism are not in this alone. The backlash against ADHD diagnosis has been more intense then against Autism, it has been sustained and ongoing for over a decade now.

When I was young these negative views of autistic traits was common as only the most severe cases were recognized. We made incredible progress, but now we are in the process of throwing a lot of it away.

Heartbreaking

I told a doctor while they were evaluating my son to see where his development is at and where he is delayed that I think autism is too quickly diagnosed and she agreed.

In terms of age or just that the process isn't long enough? I agree somewhat on the first one, because I think it's not that unlikely for a very young NT to get tagged for being a bit behind developmentally. In terms of length, I think that entirely depends on what the evaluation consists of. A proper one would span hours, be extensive, and consist of multiple appointments.

Yeah, I love using that analogy because it screams out my point without having to explain in too much detail.

Also, some Aspies tend to use too much black and white thinking when it comes to comparing the ASD population to the NT population. Like in some posts in the past I have come across things like ''all NTs hate routine'', and ''nothing interests NTs''. Now that is highly inaccurate, and ''hate'' is a very strong word. The common Aspie feeling secure and less anxious when following a routine does not mean that routine is something NTs hate. OK some hate routine but that is down to the individual, Aspie or not. But in general, most NTs that I know prefer routine, and often routine is important, otherwise you'll never know whether you're coming or going. And lots of NTs prefer to follow routine by choice too, not just because they have to. Also NTs have interests, and a lot have interests other than sport, celebrities and fashion. My cousin is 100% NT but he's into heavy metal bands. My friend is 100% NT but he loves fishing. My uncle is 100% NT but he loves films, and has whole collections of different ones in the spare room in his house. Social interests or not, they're still interests.