Out of sight, out of mind...
Webalina
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Joined: 27 Jul 2012
Age: 66
Gender: Female
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Location: Piney Woods of East Texas
I have a weird memory thing that maybe someone can help me with.
I forget things -- paying bills, doing chores, running errands -- because I don't have a reminder of some sort. I know everybody does that sometimes, but mine is BAD. I even forget about food in the pantry and refrigerator because it's not directly in my line of view, but rather in a drawer or container, or even wrapped in foil. I have had utilities cut off and checks bounce because I didn't remember to pay the bill or go to the bank. I even forget to take medicine I need. I try to make notes of things I need to remember, but even then it doesn't always work because I don't always have the list in front of me. I have a whiteboard where I write appointments and so on, but that only works when I'm at home. When I'm away, I forget what's on the board.
I don't know if it's getting worse or I'm just noticing it more, but it really has me concerned. I get worried that it's an age thing -- I'm 54 -- and that I'm losing my faculties. Does anyone else have an issue with this, and if it's ASD-related, how?
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ASPartOfMe
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It seems like part of the Executive Functioning dysfunction common in ASD. If you are under stress it can make it worse. There are all sorts of reminder software out there
If you remember to do something related to living independently do it immediately no matter how much you want to put it off because you are engrossed in something .
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Oh yeah, was just talking with someone yesterday about this. Don't know if it's ASD related but I've noticed my memory get progressively worse as I've aged. After 50 it has really gotten bad; have to make notes for pretty much everything now. To be honest it kinda scares me. It would just figure that after everything else I'd get some sort of dementia to finish off my life. ![]()
I have all those same problems, except with bill paying which I am vigilant about...but other things, yes, like food going out of date. I need concrete, visual reminders of things to do. And sometimes even when I look right at something I'm likely to just see right past it and not register mentally that it needs to be done. Like, when I need to take something with me in the morning, I can hang it on the front door but it's very unlikely I would actually remember to pick it up off the door and take it with me...so it has to go in the car first thing when I think of it.
Out of sight, out of mind, is very typical of ADHD. And just plain "out of mind" LOL
Can you put your bills on auto-pay? I've done that with most of my bills and it really makes things easier.
auntblabby
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re: the OP- there are some systematizing things I've learned from occupying earthly space for the last few decades-
*put EVERY DAMNED THING down on paper! preferably bullet lists. become well-practiced at making TO-DO lists.
*consult these to-do lists RELIGIOUSLY, first thing upon awaking.
*prioritize! most important things occupy the top rungs of the bullet list you make EVERY DAMNED DAY.
*complete ALL prioritized tasks FIRST.
*CHECK-OFF all completed tasks.
I call the above my "brains on paper."
for refrigerators and food, I habitually rotate everything, new goes in back and old is up front, I learned this working in a hospital which had regular outdates to pull. so to save money/minimize waste we made sure we used the old stuff first. one might put boxes of non-perishable supplies in shallow boxes in the back of each refrigerator shelf, thereby forcing one to keep perishable food items up front where they are always in-sight and in-mind. leave space on either side of these boxes in case you have to shove front items aside to access food in the boxes. always remember to re-situate the boxes and frontal [perishable] food items afterwards.
for bills, have a fold-out-table bureau where bills are always done, this should be near where one regularly sits and entertains oneself via TV or stereo or computer et al. all of the mail and bills should go atop this bureau where one can immediately see it. attack each bill as it comes without fail, then mail it out! fast and furious. if you have to delay payment until the paycheck comes in, tack each bill payment onto a calendar next to the bureau that you can't ignore, with the date of payment/mailing written on it boldly, in back opposite the address. this side faces out where you can see the date. check your calendar each time you use the bureau, as a habit. alternatively, use automatic bill pay linking the utility to your checking account, I've done that with a few things, saves on postage and worry. write all appointments on the calendar or on a separate date calendar atop the bureau fold-out table.
those are the important things. everything else is gravy. it works for me, though I realize individual mileage may vary 
