Who else feels broken and misserable because of their Autism

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My autism has affected me in such a negative way. My brain and thinking is all messed up, I feel so broken. My life has basically been crap because of my Autism. I wish one day will they find a cure for this horrible condition. I am so tired of people acting like having autism is a good thing, when their is nothing good about it for me.

Anyone else here feel the same, feeling broken, wanting something to help rid you this horrible condition?

I'm sure you're going to get a lot of people who disagree, but I totally relate. It has caused some serious trauma, anxiety, and depression. I don't want to use those terms lightly, and I've never been diagnosed with those things, but it certainly feels like it. It's almost driven me to suicide so many times, with one half-hearted attempt. I do think I'm getting a lot better though, and I'm learning to appreciate myself for who I am. It does still sometimes suck, kind of like not being able to walk, while you see everyone around you walking fine.

I hope that things change for the better and soon for you OP, I really do. Obviously you are in a very very unhappy place right now. Putting aside the debate as to whether being on the spectrum is good or not - that's just a matter of individual opinion - what is going on for you just now that has led to this cry of despair, and what kind of support would help you?

I do only because I keep receiving messages that to be Autistic you must understand people who hate NTs. I wonder if I was misdiagnosed, it seems I have too much empathy for others to be able to relate to me here.

I feel the same way. The absolute only advantage Asperger's gives me is improved long term memory, which is pretty much only useful for nostalgia. I can experience hyperfocus, but when I don't, I have poor focus. In every other way it's a disadvantage that holds me back, limits my opportunities and causes misunderstandings and problems.

I do only because I keep receiving messages that to be Autistic you must understand people who hate NTs. I wonder if I was misdiagnosed, it seems I have too much empathy for others to be able to relate to me here.

Every case is different. When I discovered AS, it made sense out of many peculiarities in my life, but after years of further reflection, I see that at least half of my troubles come from a dysfunctional family that only knew to ignore the Aspie tendencies in anyone, and otherwise act like machines.
Not finding what I needed, I picked the likeliest looking new environment every several years until I found better niches for me.

Depends on my mood..

If i get another awkward social interaction.. like visiting my best friend once every 3/4 weeks but have no idea on how to keep the conversation going after the standard 'how are you' stuff.. it would feel like a strained muscle. It will hurt me for a few hours... questioning how unfair life is and stuff like that. I am thankful atleast that she understands since she has pddnos aswell.

If i feel stuck in life again with no long term inprovements in my social life.. the strained muscle starts to become a broken bone... i become depressed for a few weeks

And lastly, when i think about my future, having kids and PLENTY of disastrous relationships (if i ever get there..) it feels like mental cancer.. it makes me want to 'cut' the limitations out of my brain with a knife if i had the oppertunity to do so while keeping all the good stuff in. So i just stopped caring about that and have been single for 3 years now. Feels much better

I do believe I have some positive autistic traits but the negative ones are bad enough to render positive ones totally useless. I'd say my life would have been so much better without autism. So, yes, I can relate to the OP. But realistically there is no way to change it and I'd rather try to enjoy what I have than keep putting myself down.

I do feel broken and miserable but not necessarily due to the autism in itself, though aspects of that certainly don't help things. Though I cannot fathom how to be cured of how my brain is wired, aside from invasive treatments to attempt to make my brain function 'normal' so don't really see a cure happening...at least not a cure without very high risk of ending up worse off.

At times I really do feel crippled by it. If other comorbidities weren't enough. I wish I could interact with others normally sometimes, but this is who I am.