"treat others as you would like to be treated"

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I don't know if I do this or not, I don't think I use myself as much of an example when I'm interacting with the real world. My behaviours and actions in public are not based on my own being so much as a construct of what someone else expects or 'does the person react like they like this when I do it', or 'do I want to do this because I think it will be fun'. (The last 2 items on that list are few and far between these days for me, especially the last one, as I don't really have/interact with friends)

Ever since I was a child I remember learning and trying to act the way I should and the way other people want you to act when you're around, because it's just easier that way (like when interacting with parents) or because then people will trust me and tell me things about themselves which made me feel like I had power. (Yeah, manipulative but if they don't perceive it as such and I'm not harming them in any way). I don't really do either of those things now, and I'm like, lonely and am a boring person. The motivation just isn't there, individuals just aren't interesting so much anymore.

I'm not even sure I know how I would like to be treated, how I personally like my interactions to be like. But this doesn't seem to hinder me from being able to act appropriately; what hinders me from being social is lack of desire to be social (even though I'm nearly always happier when I am.)

Sometimes people don't want to be treated the same as you would want to be treated.

Yes, "do-as-you-would-be-done-by" seems very just and fair, but it assumes everybody feels the same way about things. If you're different, the adage doesn't always work, though all people have their basic humanity in common, so it's still very useful. For ASDers dealing with the general population, the adage "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" can be a good idea. If that's too uncomfortable, it might be better to leave Rome, unless you're powerful enough to conquer it or at least to air your eccentricities without too much personal risk.

It can seem quite hard to know what paradigm to use in a specific instance, but it's usually possible to simply ask the individuals concerned how they wish to be done by. Sometimes they will give a straight answer, though politeness, assumptions about mind-reading skills and about "common sense" about the "done thing," and certain moods, can blur the picture. It helps if you enjoy solving complicated mysteries.

I don't really have an issue with how others want to be treated, but I don't use myself as an example for that at all. I rather feel like I know others better than myself