Small kids make me anxious

Post Reply New Topic

When I'm out in public and there's a kid that's near me, I start feeling anxious and panicky inside. If someone puts their kid in the seat next to or behind me on the bus, I have to get up and move. A young baby under 10 months is all right, but a child between the ages of 1 and 4 really agitate me, the age varies depending on how annoying/loud/fidgety the kid is, but it's mostly the toddler stage I find unpredictable.

Obviously if I know a young child personally, I do like them, but I don't know anyone with small children, the youngest children I know are my aunt's ex-boyfriend's girls, but they are 9 and 12 now so are at more bearable ages. Otherwise there's nobody else I know that well who have small children.
I was thinking of working at a nursery so I can overcome my anxiety, because I know underneath I would be a very caring, loving person to children and I would never hurt them.

But anyway the discussion is, does anyone else here feel the same way? Do you feel anxious when someone brings their kid on the bus or if there are kids running around you?

I remember a few years ago some little kids were literally running around me like I was a post. I walked away rather harshly, and their mother gave me a funny look. What does she expect? I wouldn't let my kids run around a stranger like that, unless the stranger was encouraging them and playing along in their game.

I used to feel nervous whenever a small child got near me because I didn't know if they would start bullying me or start doing things to me because I would always be the one to blame if I get upset with them and start yelling and screaming and pushing them away.

Last bbq I went, that happened to me, suddenly the little kids found me a nice slapping target, uhm that was a bit embarrassing, but I turned it into a game, and that bored them after a little while.
Little kids, when you talk to them, it's their turn to be embarrassed or you start a little conversation.
It's the bigger kids that scare me more, specially when it's a group.

I used to be freaked out because young kids would try to get me to play "pretending" games, and I was unable to do this when I was a child, let alone as an adult. But I now have a 3 year old niece, and I straight up tell her I don't like pretending because I'm too used to being truthful, but we can play with something else. She's fine with that explanation. I have this peculiar perspective with age, though. I don't seem to treat people much differently whether they're 3 or 93. For some reason small kids seem to respond to that lack of "babying" and generally like me. As you say, though, people who let their kids run riot in situations likely to be bothersome to others annoys me too, especially in restaurants. But that's the parents' fault, and I tend to give them dirty looks - can't you control your offspring?

I hate when they stare at you...I don't even know what to say, and usually just try and act like I don't notice because I am at a loss of what else to do. It's just uncomfortable.

Something that helped me be less anxious around small children was to learn a bit about developmental psychology. I still don't care to interact with them, but when they are around I can amuse myself by noticing their behavior and how they process their worlds.

I feel anxious when they try to interact with me or when they're being loud.

I feel anxious only when I have no idea what they are going to do - they might suddenly get up and run under a car or something. I am on guard when I see a stranger kid in potentially unsafe area - I am ready to run and protect it if it gets some weird idea and they parent doesn't care. Fortunately I was never in such situation however I took care of a toddler once when his mother left him in baby carrier unsupervised by a shop door and went shopping. I was afraid someone might hurt the kid if they see there is noone watching over him (plus - he was crying for his mom) so I went up and started talking to the kid, pointing different stuff in the surroundings, naming them and telling their colors. The kids mother thanked me when she returned.

Small kids are easy to deal with for me. Usually stuffs like "Hey, look what I got here." and making a plane out of piece of paper in front of them are enough to make them consider me a God, lol.

I can easily get along with toddlers. I really like the way they look at world. I am considered the perfect big sis. Little kids capture my whole focus and I cannot help teaching them. I certainly give their parents some free time. When they let me take care of their kid they don't have to worry untill there is time to change diaper or give the kid some food.

Babies, school-age kids and teenagers are much harder to deal with because they are either too stupid to understand anything I try to teach them or look down on me(starting at age 5...).

They are direct and like to do things repetitively so we usually get along.

Yeah I usually don't really like being in the same building with little kids. One of the main reasons is that they have a tendency to lose control of their ability to hold their food, often without warning. Like not that long ago I was in a store and I smelled something nasty, and then I saw a toddler had barfed on the floor. Couldn't get out fast enough.

I don't like to be around babies or small children. If they are disabled and older, it can be less severe.

..Hm .

Hmm, it seems most people here prefer small children to anyone else. Maybe it's my social anxiety that makes me feel agitated around small children. I get anxious in crowds anyway, and small children just adds to all the hectic atmosphere of crowds, which makes me even more anxious. I get panic attacks when someone is coming on to the bus with a load of children under 6. I feel more relaxed again when they are not seated near me, but usually they are. That's because I'm always sitting in the wrong place at the wrong time. Usually I'm upstairs on a double-decker bus, quietly relaxing with my music in my ears, looking out at the lonely countryside - when all of a sudden I hear feet stomping up the stairs, high shrieks and squeals, and then suddenly about two toddlers find their way to the seat right next to me and want to sit there, and then the parents come up, carrying about two other babies, and then another toddler is following behind, and they all choose to sit right near me, when the whole bloomin' upper deck of the bus is empty! It's more irritating when I can hear the sound of these kids over my music, and they are in the seat behind me kicking the back of my seat with their feet, and not sitting still. And then one starts crying loudly about something stupid, and my peace is suddenly shattered. It's happened to me twice in the last couple of months.

BUT - if I saw a child run out into the road and a vehicle was coming and I was the nearest, I would instinctively run out and save the child. It's just my instinct. So I am not an evil person just because I don't like children in general. I would never want to see one hurt, neglected or dead.

And teenagers I dislike in a different way. They act like maniacs in public, then when you look at them they give you the ''what you looking at?!'' look, or shout silly noises in your face, which then shows you up.
I've been used as a target by teenagers too. A few months ago I went into McDonald's. There was no queue, but there were people ordering their fast food at the counters, so I waited (being the only one in the queue). A group of teenagers (both boys and girls) were sitting at a nearby table, and one of them jumped up and stood right in front of me, and the others were laughing. I thought perhaps he had been in the queue but went back to his table to get something then saw me there and didn't want to lose his place, so I stood patiently and thought ''well, fair enough''. Then the boy ran over to the bit where the straws are, and stood there grinning, then ran back to his table again. They were all laughing like he was hilarious, and I began to think that they were trying to piss me off. I tried to pretend I hadn't noticed, because I knew all they wanted was a reaction. I do get fed up with being a target for stupid idiot's silly little games.

When I go on a double-decker bus, I always try to sit on the back seat in one of the corners. I don't like having people sit near me, and at least by doing this, I prevent anyone sitting behind me. Even so, my heart sinks when a parent accompanied by a couple of noisy children gets on the bus, and the kids rush towards the back seat. All prospects of quietly daydreaming, or calmly observing the scenery, disappear and I feel tense for as long as the situation persists.

I also feel very ill at ease when I see a group of teenagers, or even adults to a lesser extent. I just don't really understand the "pack mentality".

Newer liked children, not even as a child. Groups of children made me nervous and they still do.
I have gotten quite used to small children generally. I actually quite like babys but older children have to be special (or odd) before I like them.
I have four children my self and adore them, it can be learned

Where do you live?
I have never seen more than 2 toddlers in a bus at once. I suppose there is not enough children in my area or their parents prefer to use cars.

And preschools rent buses for school trips instead of using public transpiration.

A bunch of small kids in public transport would probably overwhelm everyone.