Sometimes acknowledging the pain of others and in myself is too painful to acknowledge so I dissociate to protect myself. I concentrate on one thing and one thing only. I may adopt a new persona deliberately or subconsciously. I know this trait very well as I see it constantly in someone close to me who also has aspergers (most likely). Perhaps I learned this trait from this person who is struggling so hard to survive in an intense, difficult world. Perhaps this person is to be admired and respected and in turn I should respect myself more.
It may be trying to say the right thing, do the right thing, act the right way. The other person sees this as coldness and then in turn I usually try not to acknowledge. Sometimes I try to acknowledge it and I feel guilt. Most of the time I try not to acknowledge but the more I acknowledge pain the happier and more grounded I feel.
Maybe this can help someone. Or maybe it won't.
Sometimes I try to deny these feelings
03 Feb 2015, 5:53 pm
