Egomaniac moves into adjacent desk

Post Reply New Topic

I have a problem. An egomaniac is moving into the desk next to me in the open plan office. There will be approximately 2m between us, thankfully there is a low wall in between so they can't sidle up to me without coming around to the aisle on my side. This person came in today and announce that the office was far too quiet, needed music and that he needed all these desks for 'his people' so we would have to move out some time soon. All of this was said in jest but actually he is serious but knows he has to make a joke of it because its a rather inflammatory statement if he is serious.

What am I to do?

Is the egomaniac a peer employee or a manager/supervisor?

A bit of both. Don't report to the person but they have a large amount of influence in the wider organisation and are naturally domineering. In my role I have to work across the whole organisation so I have to deal/work with this person.

Just ignore the guy and his loudness. Respond politely if he asks you a question. Don't respond to his loudness. If you don't react too much if he focuses on you, he'll get the hint and go on to someone else.

Maybe all of those desks will be for 'his people' and you can move somewhere quieter / further from him? I feel sorry for 'his (theoretical) people' already.

Yikes - my condolences.

Maybe you can make up a excuse why you need a cubicle somewhere else farther away.

Other option would be to pull a Wiley Coyote and saw the floor in a circle around their chair while they are stting in it

Sandwich technique might be most useful approach:

"That's a great idea, lots of people will like it! The only small problem with it - we will need to relocate me to the quietest office, -I'm not sure if you knew thats my hypersensitive hearing causes me concentration problems if there is a lot of background noise - however if you help solve that so that your idea doesn't sabotage my work performance, it's a goer.."

You are planting a seed for the future - if he goes ahead and your work performance is sabotaged, you have grounds...

Have you communicated your concerns with your employer's human-resources staffers? They are the compliance managers for much of what is legally required, allowable and prohibited. They are also charged with doing what it takes to improve productivity. If they ignore your concerns, the whole business can be held responsible for failing to act on a legitimate complaint. Moreover, communicating with them (and asking for a written reply) is the best way to protect your continued employment if your productivity declines or counter complaints are made by the egomaniac and his supporters.

Communicating with HR in writing can be easy and simple: "I am concerned that [the egomaniac] has joked about my workplace location and how I might need to remove myself for the sake of his subordinates, and about how he desires to introduce music so near me. My ability to maintain my productivity and manage my workload has relied on the conditions in my area as they have been. I believe that such drastic changes could disturb my abilities, productivity and workload management. Please advise me about what remedies exist at [the business] to prevent such a disturbance."

If you choose to ride it out, I respect that and there has been some good ideas about that choice from others.

Good luck.

Most interesting contributions to this issue.Thanks to everyone.

On the idea of taking a formal approach and involving HR, the organisation I work for is very traditional and celebrates characters of the type that is being placed next to me in the office The organisation is likely to pretend to do something about the issue, allow the issue to resolve itself between the individuals concerned or in more extreme cases, when one or other party resigns or does something that forces an escalation of the issue. Dare I say it, there is an element in the company culture that values and condones (secretly) the idea of people 'sorting it out between themselves' which generally means something something similar to when children have a 'playground showdown'.

As on many other occasions, I generally ride these situations out, however painful and unpleasant. While I am a sensitive person as Aspies are, and abhor violence and bullying, I am a large physically strong person so not likely to be physically intimidated. My biggest weakness is verbal assault. I just don't communicate well enough verbally. As a consequence, I weather a lot of verbal abuse until I crack and then I fly into an almighty rage. Happens regularly.

Practice! If you choose my suggestion, say it to yourself over and over for half an hour while you do mundane things at home. Write it out 25 times on paper. Go to sleep practicing it in your mind, coupled with the reinforcing thought: I can do this. Practice... you can do this. You can even make this a win win. Go for it! You have power. Don't give it away by feeling powerless and letting that trigger self-sabotaging behaviours. We will support you.

Are you capable of killing and making it look like an accident?

Technically, I am most capable of killing things. I have the background (military training) and the general instincts given the right reasons. However,I'm a very peaceful person so killing is not an option even if I could hide it.

For the previous post, thank you for the moral support. There isn't an immediate problem. The notion of having music in the office and moving us all because our spots are needed by this person is a poor attempt at humour with a serious underlying intent. That means that nothing of that sort will happen anytime soon. The trouble will be insidious; a slow building and maneouvring and jockeying along with veiled humour and assertive aggressive occupancy of 'space'. The clincher will be where at some point this person starts issuing direct instructions in a master-servant style and it is then that there will need to be a reckoning because I just don't do that unless the person is the CEO.

The choice is either wait for that or do some ground-preparing stuff now, a pre-emptive charm offensive in which you have nothing to lose. You will know which is more likely to succeed in the circumstances of your workplace, and you could learn some new skills in this exercise, that could be a win for you.

Charm? I'm definitely not charming. Attempts at charm generally come across (I'm told) as patronising, condescending and as if I'm trying to make a fool of the person concerned. Charm offensives are a high risk activity for me. I find that getting on with my business, ignoring irritations, noise and unwanted social activity is the best way. I observe and monitor people very closely to identify any dangerous activity and if necessary I combat it. The downside of all this is that my style is a very defence-orientated one and I never really get onto the front foot and engage people effectively. That would require charm offensives (which generally don't work) or a lot of verbal communication with groups of people. I don't like communicating verbally and especially not in group situations. People seem to just engage in talk-fests with limited factual basis and talk acrossand over each other. Ultimately the charismatic political sort wins the day regardless of the merit of what they might propose. I hate it. Hence, I remain in my trenches.