A twist on Aspie frendships turning sour

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Am an Aspie became friends with a relative with classic Autism.

I sense that I have messed it up.

For once I can drop the guilt I gave it my best and failed.

I can not maintain friendships with anybody.

Maybe classic Autism and Aspergers are different on some levels and I think those of us with Aspergers are the ones lacking something fundamental.

How do you think you've "messed up?"

Maybe you just FEEL that you've messed up. I've FELT that way many times; frequently, it turned out not to be true.

I just can't maintain a friendly warm and energized outward vibe I guess.

kraftiekortie can I ask you something personal?

Sure.

Also: you don't have to be a raving bastard--but you don't always have to be "friendly." People respond to you "being yourself." If the "friendliness" seems phony, people will notice it, even people with severe disabilities.

Question asked via PM

Not sure that message went I am a bit unfamiliar with this new board.

There is an Aspie group that meets once every two weeks that I was thinking of meeting maybe I need to do that.

I think that would be a good idea.

This is the truth: the first step toward healing is Insight.

Everyone messes up sometimes Sharkie, keep things in perspective. You don't have to get it right every time all the time. Nobody else does, whatever they say!

Thanks B19.

Something else is on my mind a job I started with advice from this board two and half years ago.

Well it took effort and for once I did not get bullied and people got to see I was really ok even if I was odd.

Well it looks like it might be closing just found out today.

You're very warm. I take things personally and am easily hurt too, but when I look at Neurotypical people they seem to get by and have friends even when they're not consistently warm and friendly. It does seem like people have an easier time in relationships when they believe they're good at them. I've been trying not to remind myself how bad I am at making friends anymore, it doesn't make anything better.

Most of the time too people are happy to blame something outside themselves for problems, try not to let that be you.

I'm sorry your friendship went south.

What's closing Sharkattack?

I think my job will be closing.

I'm sorry, sounds stressful for everyone especially if you both work there. Hard to be perfect enough when everyone is stressed.

I think you said you're a security guard, right?

There are always security guard positions open. Now that you've had 2 1/2 years experience, it shouldn't be difficult to get another job.

It's only natural that some anxiety will be kicking in at this change to your daily life. Don't beat yourself up over it. When is the closure happening? Can they offer you some liaison in getting another job with a similar firm?