Could my grandpa have had Asperger's?

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Maybe my mind is trying to make connections where there are none but here it goes:

It seemed like I was the only person he actually ever wanted to talk to (I shouldn't say wanted to talk to, but rather would talk to without seeming like he'd rather not), he did not want to talk or socialize with anyone. He did not like to go out or meet new people. In social gatherings he usually remained quiet and by himself. At home, I somtimes observed him outside and he seemed to like being around and talking to the dogs when nobody was around.

He very much liked, or I guess you can say was "obsessed" with building things and was constantly fixing up the house. It was a passion of his. I remember him getting really upset when things didn't go his way.

He had a very rigid daily routine that I don't think I ever saw him deviate from. He would wear the same clothes and always buy the exact same shoes. When my grandma would buy him a new shirt, he would refuse to wear it if it didn't look eaxctly like the other ones he had. He also never wore socks, if that's relevant.

I would catch him talking to himself all the time. He also used to make weird noises all of a sudden, somtimes animal noises or maybe somthing like an "AAAOOO", for no apparent reason.

It seems like I'm just pointing out his flaws, so I feel the need to say that I loved my grandpa very much (which came to my realization after he passed away, and it helped me somewhat understand love as a feeling), and he was actually one of the very few people I felt a deep connection to.

I have wondered for the past year and a half if my great uncle may have had it too. He hardly socialized with anyone, even with his own family, never married and I can remember him telling me friends are lot of work and women and relationships so he never wanted them. Plus he had a tractor he liked taking apart and putting back together. It runs in my family anyway where people like to take stuff apart just to see how it works. My grandfather did it, my uncle and my great uncle as far as I know.

I was in my teens then and couldn't understand how can friends be lot of work if they can take care of themselves and look after themselves. it's not like you have to feed them, and watch them and make sure they go to bed or do their homework. I thought the same with women too and relationships. Now as an adult I can see what he was talking about and I agree. So I guess it was easier for him to be antisocial and stay single.

I have suspected if my uncle has it too as well and I wasn't surprised when my mom said to me one time "I think he might have Asperger's" and then she told me to not say anything to him about it or else he get mad. I haven't because he has a short temper and anything seems to make him mad so I don't really associate with him. I didn't notice that in him until I was 14 when I had to spend a week with him and I decided I never wanted to be around him again. There were other things too I saw I didn't like. But yet I invited him to my wedding just because. He's family.

They could have it or just have traits. Same as my grandmother. My dad definitely has traits but after living with him for 19 years, I know he doesn't have enough. But the rest I am not sure about even though my parents used to tell me my grandmother has it too. It was my dad that mostly said it. I was never sure if it was to make me feel better because she had four kids and was married to the same guy for over 50 years and I was thinking I would never do this or that because of my AS.

I'm pretty positive my Grandpa was, as was his father, and his father before him.

RW, I'm sorry for the loss of your grandpa.

I don't know if my FIL is HFA or Asperger's - I suspect he is - but he only socializes with a small group of people and is interested in fixing things and making crafts.

yes, it sounds like your grandfather may have had AS.

i went through something similar with my grandmother. from what i have been told, she displayed many strange social behaviors, had trouble with relationships (both with family members and friends), and was often a source of frustration for her loved ones. i luckily got to know her when i was a kid and always really enjoyed spending time with her. i felt like she understood me, and everything that she did that others thought was "weird" made perfect sense to me. it would bother me sometimes when family members talked negatively about her, because it was almost like they were insulting me as well, and i knew they just didn't understand. we were so much alike that we even said the same thing at the exact same time on occasion! unfortunately, by the time i was about 10 years old, she started to display symptoms of alzheimer's and dementia, and she then passed away when i was 19. because i didn't realize that i had AS until several years later, and because my only memories of her real personality (pre-alzheimer's, etc) are from when i was very young, i cannot say for sure that she had AS like i do. but i suspect that she did. i am fairly certain that my father is on the spectrum as well (though not as affected as i am) although he will deny it whenever the subject is brought up. every once in a while i wonder what it would have been like for me if my grandmother had remained lucid during my teen/early adult years, and if we had been able to discuss our condition and support each other (and maybe even talk some sense into my dad!!). but i know that she enjoyed my company before she started to go downhill, so that at least makes me happy.

it sounds like you and your grandfather shared a similar bond, and i think that's wonderful

I'm positive that my great-uncle on my mom's side had it.

Thank you for all the input. I felt the same way you did kat_ross when people talked about my grandpa in a negative manner.

It would be illogical to assume no one in our families had it before us.