About the "lack of self-awareness" label

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Jayo
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21 Feb 2015, 5:28 pm

Why is it that one of the traits of Aspergers is "lack of self awareness"? I mean, even prediagnosis in the '90s as a youth, before even hearing of Aspergers, I knew I was weird, socially and physically awkward, I didn't lack awareness of those traits in myself. I lacked the tacit knowledge on how to deal with them.

Even when I got my diagnosis, in 2001, I wasn't all bewildered like " Really??! I'm THAT kind of person??! I had no idea, that sounds nothing like me.". THEN _that_ could be considered a gross lack of self awareness. But no,I wasn't in denial, it was cathartic.

Even "in the moment" when a situation - past or present - triggered negative emotions in me, I was totally aware of them. I felt myself tense up, or my jaw clench or tears well up, but then I immediately snapped back to reality. I instantly realized,I can't project this appearance in my setting, so I just as soon resumed a normal mask.

So why this "lack label"?? Was this a symptom that bypassed me or did I misinterpret the label?
:?



TheAP
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21 Feb 2015, 5:35 pm

I think people with Asperger's can definitely have a lack of self-awareness, or lack of awareness of how they appear to others. Especially when younger. But like everyone else, our self-awareness develops as we get older. I think I have pretty good self-awareness. So do most adolescents and adults with Asperger's, from what I've seen on this website.



CockneyRebel
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21 Feb 2015, 5:49 pm

I also had self awareness as a youth. I knew i was different and how I came across. It royally pissed me off when my resource room teacher put in my last report card that I needed to learn self awareness in public places as though I was clueless. My parents and I just completely ignored that one sentence, because we all knew that by that time, I was very self aware.


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ominous
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21 Feb 2015, 5:55 pm

Nothing in the DSM V about 'lack of self awareness'. I tried to look it up before responding to see if I could figure out why they say we lack self awareness but couldn't find it. Can you point it out to me? I think we tend to be so self aware that it's often debilitating.



Waterfalls
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21 Feb 2015, 6:10 pm

There's a tendency to assume lack of self awareness when someone does something that isn't understood or seems strange or wrong. Often, though, the course of action that's being labeled as related to lack of self awareness makes more sense than any alternative to the person doing it. It just seems like lack of self awareness by people not able to see things from a different perspective.



olympiadis
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21 Feb 2015, 6:20 pm

ominous wrote:
Nothing in the DSM V about 'lack of self awareness'. I tried to look it up before responding to see if I could figure out why they say we lack self awareness but couldn't find it. Can you point it out to me? I think we tend to be so self aware that it's often debilitating.



Maybe this just shows that there is a difference between awareness of an actual state and the awareness of a how a state is perceived by others.
To reach the same conclusions as those around you, you have to be running the same software as they are.

I believe that an ASD person can accurately describe both their internal state, and their outward appearance.
What they have trouble doing is describing how their outward appearance is being read or translated by those around them, - the way that others assign meaning to things.



ominous
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21 Feb 2015, 6:34 pm

olympiadis wrote:
ominous wrote:
Nothing in the DSM V about 'lack of self awareness'. I tried to look it up before responding to see if I could figure out why they say we lack self awareness but couldn't find it. Can you point it out to me? I think we tend to be so self aware that it's often debilitating.



Maybe this just shows that there is a difference between awareness of an actual state and the awareness of a how a state is perceived by others.
To reach the same conclusions as those around you, you have to be running the same software as they are.

I believe that an ASD person can accurately describe both their internal state, and their outward appearance.
What they have trouble doing is describing how their outward appearance is being read or translated by those around them, - the way that others assign meaning to things.


Exactly. Have you ever considered writing a book about ASD? Most of what you have to say here in the forums is brilliant. This isn't the first thread in which I've wanted to mention that to you.



Jayo
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21 Feb 2015, 9:13 pm

olympiadis wrote:
ominous wrote:
Nothing in the DSM V about 'lack of self awareness'. I tried to look it up before responding to see if I could figure out why they say we lack self awareness but couldn't find it. Can you point it out to me? I think we tend to be so self aware that it's often debilitating.



Maybe this just shows that there is a difference between awareness of an actual state and the awareness of a how a state is perceived by others.
To reach the same conclusions as those around you, you have to be running the same software as they are.

I believe that an ASD person can accurately describe both their internal state, and their outward appearance.
What they have trouble doing is describing how their outward appearance is being read or translated by those around them, - the way that others assign meaning to things.


Hit the nail right on the head there!! 8)

That's a very accurate description of the root cause, taking it away from the NT laymen explanation "oh, they're just not aware of themselves, they're spaced out."

That old canard, plus a couple of other gross assumptions like "people with Aspergers prefer to be alone and engage in solitary activity" (um, no, that's not a core symptom, it's driven more by years of bullying and bred cynicism), or the rich one "Asperger people can't read facial expression" (also wrong, we can read static facial expressions with the same accuracy as NTs, but just have trouble with it during social dynamics and processing incapacity), but those explanations are bandied about by laymen because they're convenient. Granted, I could elaborate on the root causes as such with NT laymen, as in the last sentence of olympiadis's quote above, but the paradox is that I'd be called pedantic or Rain-man-like. :roll: So I don't even bother. And that, my friends, is the true essence of predicting how I might be perceived by others :P :lol:



olympiadis
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21 Feb 2015, 11:04 pm

Well thank you for saying so, and validating me in some way.

In one way this worries me because I've been gaslighted and supposed to be crazy.
Maybe this just means that you're crazy too and I'm in good company?

You know, if these thoughts and some others (in other threads) are correct, then it does have some serious implications for all of us.
It suggests that most of our pain does not come from our actual condition, but is caused by the assimilation process that we are embedded within.
It also suggests that my conceptual boogie man that I call the hive mind may really exist, and that there may be some obligation to try to save people from it, or try to shut it down, very much like the Matrix movie.
But, it's generally easier to say that this is all imaginary or I'm full of crap, crazy, or something like that.
I do live with five cats :D
...we're all cats here.



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21 Feb 2015, 11:18 pm

olympiadis wrote:
It suggests that most of our pain does not come from our actual condition, but is caused by the assimilation process that we are embedded within.


I think this is true.

I live with 6 cats. :P At one time I had 12 cats all living me with at once.



ominous
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21 Feb 2015, 11:45 pm

olympiadis wrote:
Well thank you for saying so, and validating me in some way.

In one way this worries me because I've been gaslighted and supposed to be crazy.
Maybe this just means that you're crazy too and I'm in good company?


Maybe it does. ;)

I don't think your hivemind theory is a very big departure from Irving Janis' groupthink research, which is rather widely accepted by the 'sane' population (if one wants to consider academia sane, that is). He was a research psych at Yale, so there may be hope for you (and the cats) yet. :P

But seriously, you have a brilliant mind.

I have one cat. She has Feline Hyperesthesia Syndrome from abuse as a child so we understand each other as we're both late-diagnosis, adult Autistics with PTSD, basically. :lmao:



Chronos
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22 Feb 2015, 12:04 am

Jayo wrote:
Why is it that one of the traits of Aspergers is "lack of self awareness"? I mean, even prediagnosis in the '90s as a youth, before even hearing of Aspergers, I knew I was weird, socially and physically awkward, I didn't lack awareness of those traits in myself. I lacked the tacit knowledge on how to deal with them.

Even when I got my diagnosis, in 2001, I wasn't all bewildered like " Really??! I'm THAT kind of person??! I had no idea, that sounds nothing like me.". THEN _that_ could be considered a gross lack of self awareness. But no,I wasn't in denial, it was cathartic.

Even "in the moment" when a situation - past or present - triggered negative emotions in me, I was totally aware of them. I felt myself tense up, or my jaw clench or tears well up, but then I immediately snapped back to reality. I instantly realized,I can't project this appearance in my setting, so I just as soon resumed a normal mask.

So why this "lack label"?? Was this a symptom that bypassed me or did I misinterpret the label?
:?


I believe the term "self awareness" is misleading. I have always been aware of myself. When NTs use the term "Self Awareness", I believe what they actually mean is "Awareness of how others view you." In which event, when I was younger, I had no idea how others viewed me or that others judged me or anyone else at all. As I've become more socially aware, I've made an attempt to become more cognizant of how I come across to others so as not to offend their cultural senses, and to make my life easier. I still really don't have much of an idea of how others view me. I'm very curious about this, however I don't believe most people are inclined to give honest answers when questioned on the subject of how they perceive me, as NTs often choose responses that aid in maintaining the integrity of social calmness and cohesion, over honesty.



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22 Feb 2015, 1:53 am

Thank you all for the good explanations! I think also it's ,for what I percieve, a stronger self-awareness, what occurently hinders putting the groupthink before one's real perception.



jk1
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22 Feb 2015, 2:22 am

I'm painfully aware that other people think I'm weird/strange or whatever but I don't know exactly what's making me so weird to them. Hence, I really don't know how I can be not-weird. This painful awareness of how people perceive me causes unbearable anxiety whenever I'm surrounded by people. It's been like this for many years and I don't think I'm capable of ever learning to look normal. I've given up and no longer care about looking normal but I still can't help feeling extremely uncomfortable when I'm treated badly because of my weirdness.

I don't know how the term "lack of self-awareness" fits in with my situation. Probably my inability to see the exact differences between my ways of behaving/talking etc and other people's seems to be my "lack of self-awareness", although, as I said, I'm painfully aware of the fact that others perceive me as "weird". What I'm saying seems to be slightly different from other posters' definition of "lack of self-awareness".



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22 Feb 2015, 4:24 am

..in reaction on topics like anxiety & panic attacks & anxiety & autism, (the provided link I disagree, its establishing,pardon maintaining if not re, big RE-inforcing the anxiety as a key autistic-element,* ).

Anxiety is a common thing, what might define the difference is probably, imho, the awareness in autism, which when unstructured (undisciplined) tend to cling on anxiety (as a mis-copying skill from NT, who's clinging minds/awareness originates from anxiety(indeed))(as the ND isn't comforted in the hivestructure, from it's own inside and the rejecting hivestructure, anxiety will grow).

Helping with anxiety ;

http://psychcentral.com/blog/archives/2 ... breathing/

http://www.anxietycoach.com/breathingexercise.html

http://www.helpguide.org/articles/stres ... relief.htm

http://www.webmd.com/balance/stress-man ... c-overview

http://healthland.time.com/2012/10/08/6 ... s-or-less/

Back to be in control of yourself, building selfesteem by physical activities, if possible outside.

I really think all that anxiety is more imposed by a non-active lifestyle, which maintains itself in a vicious circle. And that's the same for everybody, NT's and ND's.


Image
*http://wrongplanet.net/forums/viewtopic.php?t=277101

viewtopic.php?t=277147



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22 Feb 2015, 6:30 am

It fit me very well, I never developed self awareness until about age 22.. but autism is a spectrum, after all. I'm very much a poster child for autism but I also don't particularly have very many sensory issues at all. So, I guess we're all different.


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