Trouble with showering/hygiene? and different temperatures?

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Continuing my series of questions I wanted to ask while I see if I feel comfortable enough to tell my psychologist my suspicions of AS.

As a little kid I could NOT go to sleep without a bath. Must have been the need for routine that caused it. As I grew older I bathed less and less. And it went down to about once a week. And then a bit later I discovered I was trans (biologically female/mentally male gendered) which explained the not wanting to shower a bit. I didn't like the reminder that my body was not what it was supposed to be... but... that's only maybe 30% of why I don't like to shower. The other 80% is the following, which people don't seem to believe. They'll believe body issues, but not that I don't like showers.

Does anybody find it a real chore? Possibly on the level of cleaning my room (which I also do maybe once a week). I hate taking off my clothes, feeling naked, than feeling naked and trying to adjust to the water temperature (this is the most uncomfortable part). If the water is the temperature I am, since it's a shower and not enough water comes out, it feels cold. If it's hotter I have to wait to get used to it. And then the whole getting out into the freezing air and being all wet, and your clothes stick to you no matter how much you dried yourself. And your pants are always tighter than the ones you were wearing, which is why I like wearing the same pair of pants for at least 3 days. I used to at least try for once a week since we had a bathtub and I would get to relax in it later, but now that I don't I avoid it like the plague... Any tips? I've tried those heater thingies but they made no difference. When I get out of the shower I'm still freezing.

Also I don't see the point sometimes. If I don't smell (if I smell I notice it and dislike it, and clean myself of shower) and look clean what's the point!? Like seriously, if I don't tell people, they have never called me dirty or told me I smell bad. It's like the knowledge irks them. And I hate it when they tell me to take a quick shower. Passing yourself through water everyday with a 5 minute shower doesn't clean anything. When I shower I take my time and scrub everything with soap.

But yeah, I have lots of temperature related sensory stuff. Is anybody else like this? Like people's hands will feel super hot to me if they touch me, unless they're the same temperature, and then it doesn't bother me as much.

I feel the EXACT same way in terms of the largest paragraph. I HATE showering, and when I say that to people (like my parents...it doesn't come up with anyone else), they say, "so you like being dirty?" Hating something doesn't mean liking something else. And I'm not dirty. I just hate the feeling of being wet and slimy, the temperature changes, the wet and slimy part, then drying off with a towel that never actually dries me off, the wet and slimy part, the cold damp hair that takes HOURS to dry, the wet and slimy part.....well, you get the idea...

I shower every second day (sometimes it doesn't happen until the third day...), and I wash my hair about twice a week. No one knows. I don't look greasy, and I am not smelly.

Edit: and I have been this way ever since I was a kid. I HATED taking a bath (we didn't have a shower head then), but once I FINALLY got in, I never wanted to come out (because I don't feel the wet and slimy part until I get out). It was also a struggle to get my hair washed ever since I was little.

Aha, I'm also trans, FtM, but I have a problem with bathing. However my problem is that I do it far too much, without really cleaning myself properly.

Depending on my level of anxiety I have a bath between once and four times a day. It's not great for my skin. I like feeling weightless, and distant from all the noise of the world.

People have told me I smelt bad rather a lot, especially in my early to mid teens. Personal hygiene is a big problem for me. I'm 19, but I still only learnt how to dry myself after a bath in the last couple of months. I used to get straight into bed after a bath, but less so now.

I have been showering just about everyday since I was 11 years old, and I am 26 now. I always shower in the morning, and on days of workouts, I will shower afterwards too. I have also had the tendency to shower just before going out on dates if i have them. I groom when I need to. Deodorant is always warn and colonge is sprayed when necessary. I know how much it matters to smell nice and look presentable.

I actually found myself enjoying the shower water a little too much from a young age. A certain warm feeling of it feels comforting. I don't like it being too hot or cold obviously and step aside when that happens because of someone using the taps or toilets in another bathroom

Yeah, I detested keeping up with hygiene, mother was always goading me to do so. I find it a chore and find a few aspects overwhelming, like brushing teeth always is a horrible experience with the sound and feel of the bristles get a bit too much. If I had my way, I would bathe at all until health problems required to do so.

Weather being Neurosis/genderless or gender apathetic contributed to hygiene difficulties I don't know but it is an interesting connection.

I find it to be bothersome like a chore that is disliked. I do not mind the temperature changes but the stickiness is not comfortable. I shower about every 4-5 days, and wear an antiperspirant to help with body odder stink.

I completely agree about showering being a chore and the most difficult part being the vast temperature changes and consequent sensory overload...it's the same reason I can't stand going to beaches or pools and swimming, no matter what...just too much frustration associated with acclimating myself to it. I do shower regularly, and as a guy with long hair, it takes me substantially longer than most men but I absolutely hate every. flippin. minute of it.

Ok. This is a cause of stress for me. My brain's shutting down when I'm trying to write.

I'm in a hotter climate, a male with a heavy, muscular build, good metabolism, longer hair style, with fine, curly texture, easily tangled. Greasy skin. If I do heavy lifting, an ammonia smell comes from around my neck. I grow plants in the dirt, generate sawdust, sand paper grit, and the occasional metal shavings. I can't stand to wear strong shoes, but when I don't, my feet get hurt and soiled.

I pick up terrible messes, around the house, which noone else will touch.

There is an extra bathroom. Not many people, here. But, every time I try to use it, there is an excuse, for why I can't go in there. I have gone dirty, from the stress of dealing with these people, but do not like the feel of sticky grunge.

There are dirty rags all over the place, which I pick up. Bottles fall and are left in the bath. The shower nozzle is attached to a tube, hangs on the wall, is left laying in the bathtub. Towels smell of mildew. The toilet is always plugged, and the wet plunger is put on top of an overflowing trashcan, which never stays empty. I'm a little afraid of chemicals, so work harder with milder stuff.

I can't put on clothes in the bathrroom without hitting the walls or touching these gross things. It's very claustrophobic, so I wash it. This is not my stuff.

The drier sheets feel smarmy to me. I like the feel and smell of crisp clothes from the line, but there is a smoker here. She tries to cover up the smell with cheap perfume. It stings my nose and still doesn't work.

Otherwise, this would be rejuvenating. I would much rather turn my brain off and not come out.

Seeing the replies...

Maybe I liked it as a kid because I only took baths, and they were always at the right temperature (which does relax me), and it was a routine for bedtime. Because I have similar routines doing things I dislike first... Like for example, I always eat the food I like least on my plate than what I like most. Otherwise I wouldn't eat the part I hated. Like I give myself rewards and they become routines.

I'm looking into maybe negotiating I was my hair every third day and changing my shirts every day (I tend to get comfy and want to wear them for more), and having a BATH, somehow... I don't know... giant bucket? or getting a shower head to no rain but pour in a stream? every week, at night only! Still don't know how to deal with the stickiness/wetness issue. I try to do as many things as possible before putting on clothes so I'm dry but I still have it... UGH

I don't have that big of a problem with brushes. Some are too soft and crappy while others have giant pieces of plastic that HURT sticking out of them. I ended up with something in the middle (Oral B Pulse). But toothpaste... oh god. First of all I forgot, but my teeth have always been super sensitive to cold, even when I was little and had no cavities. I'm seeing now this might be a sensory issue, because no dentist ever knows what to do about it. I use sensodyne now but it barely works. I can maybe drink something with ice in it. BUT I HATE HATE HATE the mint taste. I'm so glad one of the sensodyne flavors is mild, but before when I used other toothpastes, god it felt like my mouth was burning. And I can't eat mint gum or chocolate or anything because of the same reason. IT BURNS, how do people do it? I wish I could use non-flavored toothpaste (I read about some hippy toothpastes once) but they have nothing to help with the cold sensitivity.

EDIT: I take at least an hour of slowly stepping in at beaches or pools to get acclimated, and everyone wants to throw me in and I want to kill them.

I think I'm heat sensitive. I touched someone else's water and thought it could burn them. I step in a cold mountain stream, see my skin go purple, but this seems refreshing. I go out in the cold without a coat, feel stiff and short of breath. I almost fainted one night when I got sick.This cannot be the best way to take care of myself, but the coat seems stifling.

I hate the steam of the shower in a small stall, but need warmish water to cut the grime.

I love showers. Nothing beats that clean feeling at the end.

Baths I like, showers, I can manage, so long as my face stays relatively dry (hot wash cloth to wipe, maybe).

It's very overwhelming keeping up with personal hygiene. I'm biologically/mentally female, despite my hormones trying to screw things up in certain places (beard? chest/belly hair? hello? those are for men, thank you!). I also lack a sense of smell, so I try to clean at least once every three days just to be sure.

I used to be allergic to hot/cold water (I don't know how to explain it other than I would get hives if exposed to either) so my baths as a child were always the 'right' temperature. Now, I love very hot baths, but find that if I don't make the water tepid, I just lay there in the tub either reading a magazine or texting my husband, and then I'm so relaxed I don't care.

This makes me wonder about the source of the water.

I once had swelling, after chemicals had been dumped on a wildfire, hardwater dried my skin, and I got welts after being in saltwater.

I take a shower every morning right after getting out of bed. I love to just bask in the warm water. Feels really good and helps me ease out of sleep mode. I'll wear the same jeans for weeks at a time, though...

Used to really hate showers, but not so bad now we're in a warmer house. Still don't do it daily. More like twice weekly or even weekly.

It is one of the most embarrassing aspects of how I am but yeah, I shower as little as possible and tend to splash some water on my face on a morning and spray with the antiperspirant. I find it difficult to pin down why I find it so difficult but a lot of what has been described about abrupt temperature changes, not liking the sensation of being wet etc makes sense to me as well as the whole thing just feeling like a stressful chore. I am also hopelessly disorganised and live my life forgetting to do things or having 10 things to do (including shower) but only time for the most crucial one which is rarely 'take a shower'.

Another thing I cant stand but could not really explain why properly is washing dishes. Something about plunging my hands in and out of hot water just seems to wind me up. I think my wife used to think I was just being a typical bloke avoiding chores but I seriously dont like that one particular thing. I will do a job that takes 5 times the effort instead if it means I dont have to subject myself to washing up. This has to be related to showering as a heat change or water sensitivity thing? It's all so difficult to pin down when you don't know how 'normal' folks feel about stuff by comparison.