I told the psych I think I have ASD

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I gave her a list of many of the reasons (it wasn't totally comprehensive -- only what I could fit on one page) I highly suspect I have Asperger's... and she looked at the list and then said, "But you're talking to me and responding to my questions," as if someone with Asperger's can't even communicate...? I don't understand her response. The only thing it does make me think of is how when I was a kid I *wouldn't* talk or respond to doctors when they were trying to assess me for ADD. They would try to get me to communicate by letting me play with toys in the office, and the most I'd give them were one-word answers they would have to pry out of me... Is that a common thing? If so, maybe this psych's only education regarding Asperger's focused on kids' behaviors? When I was a kid, someone HAD to take care of me, so I didn't understand that I needed help, and I didn't go out of my comfort zone. Now that I'm an adult, I'm looking for help, so of course I'm going to talk about it to try to get that help. Even if it's humiliating and terrifying to admit so many weird things about myself out loud in a short session like that...

Can you get a referral to someone with more experience treating autism? She doesn't seem to familiar with it.

Definitely agree with this. For someone to say that shows they have little to no understanding of ASD, I think.

I was "lucky" in that the psychologist I saw when pursuing a diagnosis had a lot of experience working with autistic people, and actually had a fairly good idea of how we (generally) experience and react to things (I've never met an NT who came close to his level of understanding actually).

Yeah, it's pretty common to run into Psychologists who still cling to outdated stereotypes about ASD. Though yours seems almost shocking in her level of ignorance. I would look for another psychologist who specializes in working with or diagnosing people on the spectrum.

Yep...this "clinician's" knowledge of autism is in the dark ages.

Wow. Funny but also scary. Usually when people come to post here about clueless shrinks, the shrinks are parroting some stereotypes of AS, but not being able to answer questions isn't even a stereotype. Who knows where she got that nonsense from.

I guess I will have to give up for now. There doesn't seem to be anyone in my state or nearby states with open practices who diagnose and/or treat adults on the autism spectrum. I'll just have to keep coming on here and hoping to learn new things about myself through self treatment and research. I want to become more aware of what I do wrong socially and learn how to fix those problems so they won't interfere with my success in life once I find a treatment for my chronic pain and am able to pursue my dreams again.

I would like to read the books I've seen people post about Asperger's on here, but I have to wait until I find a treatment for my pain since it doesn't let me process large amounts of information at a time -- i.e., I can only read books written for young adults in very simple language right now. If anyone knows any books like that about Asperger's, let me know...

There aren't many services for adults on the spectrum anywhere.

I don't have any autism books to recommend, but I did enjoy Zen and the Martial Arts by Hyams.

The strange part of this is talking to a professional is not the same thing as talking to a random person out in public. I don't have much personal experience with this, but I think there is supposed to be patient confidentiality. If you say something that makes you feel awkward or embarrassed, it should not leave that room. That alone should take a lot of pressure off.

Also, one would hope a professional would be objectively assessing you and not be like a random dickhead out on public.

For a lot of obvious reasons, this is not a normal social encounter and evaluating it as if it was seems ridiculous.

I'm not humiliated by the idea that the information could leave the room -- just saying it all at once makes me feel weird about myself since I tried to cover this weirdness up (not too successfully, but at least so it didn't all happen at the same time to the same people) for such a long time before I learned about the autism spectrum.
And, yes, one would hope a professional wouldn't be a dickhead, but unfortunately I've met a lot who were -- not about the ASD but the chronic pain. I used to be so comfortable around doctors that I would give a monologue about everything that was happening with me during my check ups, but when I got this chronic pain disease a large percentage of them started treating me differently and seeing the monologues as a sign that I was just complaining too much and was not really disabled by my pain. After a few years of this kind of treatment, my anxiety and blood pressure increase whenever I see a doctor -- especially new ones. I have tried to change the way I communicate, but I can't help it too much when I'm so nervous. I'm humiliated by the fact that the doctor could call me a liar about whatever I'm telling them, and there's nothing I can do to change their mind at that point. I feel more pressure in those situations because I don't have time in a short appointment to articulate what I am trying to tell them sufficiently, and everything depends on them understanding so that I can get the therapy or treatment that I need.

The frustration of dealing with these people can be overwhelming. I can't imagine how much so when they won't acknowledge you're suffering physical pain.
It took me years of banging my head against a wall to get a diagnosis of autism.

I am certain you will find someone in your area who has more knowledge of ASD or is at least willing to read up on it. If you wanted to PM me your general area I could help you find someone. I'm pretty good/resourceful with that sort of thing. It's possible you aren't going to find any specialists, but it's hard to believe there are children in an entire state not being diagnosed with AS and that all licensed clinicians there are failing to upgrade their clinical understanding to the point of ignorance like your current psych.

This helps me know I am not alone. I am glad you posted.

I am having a somewhat similar issue. I live in a smallish city and search and searched for someone who said they could diagnose adults with ASD. I spent hours doing tests. I disclosed things that were extremely difficult. But because I don't "flap my hands" or "have a sing-songy voice" the Dr. thinks it's just Social Anxiety and Depression.

I had a long list of symptoms. Pages. Plus supporting information from my parents and husband. But she dismissed everything, including tics and eye contact issues she said she noticed, attributing them to Anxiety.

She showed me the results of one of the tests and it actually said on the page that my score indicates ASD! But she said she can always spot someone right away and she doesn't think I have it. She dismissed my Aspi Quiz score because she has real test that companies "charge a lot of money for." But she's not even listening to those tests!

I'm torn between either sticking with self(/spouse) diagnosis or going to a larger city to find someone who actually has experience diagnosing adults. It doesn't sound like the person I saw has actually ever diagnosed and adult.

This is really upsetting. Tell me I'm not imagining my ASD, please.

That doctor is an idiot; I hope you didn't pay her.

Is there a university with a psychology dept. nearby? You may be able to get a free or cheap assessment from a graduate psychology student, or someone on the faculty may be able to refer you to a competent professional.

Yeah, at one point she said something like, "Maybe you used to have it and you don't now..."
That's where I started worrying.



We do have a couple of Universities nearby. Also a University Medical Center. Would I just call the psychology department? Are they bound by the same confidentiality requirements?

I am also able to easily travel to a larger city. New York, Baltimore, Chicago, Dallas, Memphis, Las Vegas or Phoenix would all be easy options for me. So if someone has experience with someone in one of those cities who would be better able to help. I would certainly consider traveling to see them. I'd even consider a city not on that list. Although I would like someone who takes my insurance, if possible.

I've worked hard at fitting in (because I didn't realize what was up with me until a couple of months ago) and I've developed lots of covers and coping mechanisms. But I still struggle with some things. I need someone who really understands my type of situation, someone who has lots of experience with it. I'm not sure if I'm going to find that in my city. Would a University department be more up to date. It was just so hard to go through this last time. It's discouraging. Maybe it gets easier. I don't know.

Thank you for the help and encouragement.

It would probably be faster to check their websites. You want to find one that has a graduate program in psychology. Then you call the office for that program and ask if they provide services to the public, for adults. If not, ask the receptionist if they can suggest any places that do. If she seems confused, tell her that the licensed psychologists on faculty would know, or find their contact info from the website and ask them yourself. You can look at their research interests and experience to try to find the ones who know something about autism, but the faculty usually know each other well enough to tell you who to ask if you ask the wrong person.

Somebody at the University Medical Center might be able to refer you, but that sort of place usually serves students only, as far as I know.


As far as I know. The assessments are supervised by licensed psychologists, so I don't see why it would be any different. By the way, a graduate student would be doing the testing. You would have to agree to that.



You can try to search the psychologytoday listings in the areas to which you are willing to travel, and narrow down the search by autism and/or asperger's syndrome and/or whatever other specialties you like.

https://therapists.psychologytoday.com/ ... search.php



Try hard to be your true self when you go for any kind of assessment. Tell the doctor about your coping mechanisms and think of situations when they fail to help the doctor understand that it's an act.



Sounds like you want an assessment and counseling? Based on my experience and that of other people on WP who have been assessed at colleges, the process is rather impersonal. They give you an interview, questionnaires, and sometimes talk to parents or a significant other, but most of it is a bunch of neuropsychological tests. Whether you get diagnosed or not, they give you feedback about your areas of weakness and strength from your test scores, but it's not going to be like talking to a therapist about nuanced personal problems.

A therapist or counselor who's experienced with adult ASD issues is a rare creature, but try the psychologytoday database. I suggest that you go to a university, medical center, or autism center for the assessment, and a therapist or counselor for any treatment you need, if possible.