I wish I wasn't diagnosed

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I was diagnosed with Aspergers as a child. This diagnosis has done NOTHING good for me! Thanks to this stupid label, I have been discriminated against, treated like a f*****g 2 year old who can't do the simplest of tasks and cannot be taken seriously ! !

And the worst part: I strongly believe my diagnosis was incorrect. While my social skills aren't the best, I don't think they're bad enough to be considered Aspergers. I can read faces, understand jokes/sarcasm and [even as a child] have had alot of cognitive empathy . I don't have any of the other symptoms. No obsessions, routines, sensory issues etc. I think I have Social Anxiety instead. Yet, my therapist refuses to treat me for anxiety and won't listen to me when I tell him I think my Aspergers diagnosis is wrong. He's one of those people who believes that anyone who is the tiniest bit "different" is autistic! Because I have no support for my anxiety, I have been self medicating with large amounts of weed and alcohol [I know it isn't healthy] I honestly don't know why I'm posting this I'm just fed up with everything! I'm sorry if I offended anyone in any way.

Change therapist.

No matter if you have Asperger or not you should have right for Social Anxiety treatment. Social Anxiety is often a comorbid to Asperger and while Asperger itself is incurable it is more than possible to get rid of Social Anxiety symptoms. Getting rid of them makes life way easier.

...Hm .

Something tells me that if I wasn't diagnosed in childhood, I might have been able to make friends better through school. Because all the kids somehow knew I had this label, they acted like I was diseased, and stayed away from me. I felt terribly rejected and lonely.

Other people who are adults and have never received a diagnosis but are sure they are on the spectrum and exhibit a lot of traits, still seemed to fit in better through school. They might have struggled socially a little, and perhaps received rejection or bullying from their peers, but I was so rejected as a teenager so much that it was awful. I was left out and rejected too much for a FEMALE with MILD Asperger's, who (like the OP) has never had trouble with cognitive empathy or reading other non-verbal social cues.

And I always blame it on having a diagnosis.

How would they have known?

Because there was a girl in my class who had a severely Autistic brother, and my mum and her mum got befriended and so the girl knew I had an ASD (obviously the ''opposite'' from her brother but still on the spectrum), and she told everybody in the class when we were about 9 or 10, shortly after I was diagnosed. Also I had an aide in the classroom to help me with my work, so that also made it obvious that I was the kid with ''something wrong with me'', making it look like I was the ''ret*d kid''.

Why me, eh? Of all the odds of being the kid with an ASD, it had to be me, while all the other kids in the class were NT. I daren't think too deeply about it, otherwise I might kill myself. Thank God I'm on antidepressants, they've practically saved my life because they prevent me from thinking too hard about stuff.

If you were correctly diagnosed as having aspergers then you had behaviors that would have caused other school kids to reject you, bully you, whether you had 'aspergers' as a label or not.

If you had grown in the pre 1994 era when aspergers was not a recognized diagnosis your classmates would have 'labeled' you themselves- as a 'ret*d'.

So if you really are an aspie, who was correctly labeled as an aspie, then it would not have made any difference. Your life would have been just as miserable whether you were diagnosed or not.

If you were misdiagnosed, and really are SOME thing, but not an aspie, then that's another subject. But even so- how would other kids 'know' you were an aspie if you were in fact NOT an aspie?