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Owl123
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

Joined: 9 Jul 2015
Age: 28
Posts: 146
Location: Philippines

23 Jul 2015, 7:42 pm

tps://youtu.be/pCcmWWSnWtM

There are times when I get stuck on my bed, not wanting to get out of the house, not wanting to be seen by the world. It's when waking up and getting out of the bed are one of those that I can be thankful for. I struggled to fan out the dead fire yet ignites the flames more. I often ask myself why am I different,that oftentimes leave me out of the trail. I carry the weight of the world and they never could fathom the depth of its wound. I almost lose my battle everyday, wanting to show the world that it's within me.To carry out a simple task I have been told, from the world who tells me to live its ways. This short litany I cannot completely foretell, the storms I have inside.

I wrote these thoughts here for over 5 times now granting that every time I pause to ponder deletes this message.

I shuffled on my phone and a song popped up my mind.


Which says:



Owl123
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

Joined: 9 Jul 2015
Age: 28
Posts: 146
Location: Philippines

23 Jul 2015, 7:43 pm

"There were days when each hour was a war I
fought to survive
There were nights full of nightmares and I
dreaded closing my eyes
There were skies that burst open with a downpour
to drown me alive
But the world took a spark like a match in the
dark
And the fire brought me to life
So I'm fanning the flames to climb so high
'Cause theres no other way we can stay alive
'Cause we're burning bright
As we all unite
And when it's all said and done
We'll shine like the sun
So don't let the fire die
And we'll watch the sky
As it fills with light
And though the embers are new
Whatever you do, just don't let the fire die
And you'll find there'll be mornings
When the ashes and embers are cold
But you'll fight with a passion
And you'll never stop 'cause you know
Yeah you know, it gets better
And your story is yet to be told
Every push, every shove, every war, every love
Yeah, the coals are beginning to glow
So I'm fanning the flames to climb so high
'Cause theres no other way we can stay alive
'Cause we're burning bright
As we all unite
And when it's all said and done
We'll shine like the sun
So don't let the fire die
And we'll watch the sky
As it fills with light
And though the embers are new
Whatever you do, just don't let the fire die
Don't let the fire die
It gets better
Just don't let the fire die, no
'Cause we're burning bright (burning bright)
As we all unite
And when it's all said and done
We'll shine like the sun
So don't let the fire die
And we'll watch the sky (watch the sky)
As it fills with light
And though the embers are new
Whatever you do, just don't let the fire die
And though the embers are new
Whatever you do, just don't let the fire die
Don't let the fire die."


I hope that I can help someone live as well.



kraftiekortie
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Joined: 4 Feb 2014
Gender: Male
Posts: 87,510
Location: Queens, NYC

23 Jul 2015, 7:49 pm

That's a nice song with a nice message.

I hope you take the message to heart, too.

You are a valuable person in the world. So what if you have "social deficits." If people want to hassle you because you have "social deficits," tell them to shove it where the sun don't shine!

You're going to be treating people who really need to be treated. Trust me, they don't care about "social deficits." All they care about is that you take away their pain.



olympiadis
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Joined: 20 Jun 2014
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Posts: 1,849
Location: Fairview Heights Illinois

23 Jul 2015, 9:16 pm

[youtube]www.http://youtube/pCcmWWSnWtM[/youtube]

I can't get to the link. Could you please repost the video?

Owl123 wrote:
There are times when I get stuck on my bed, not wanting to get out of the house, not wanting to be seen by the world.



carrot4444
Hummingbird
Hummingbird

Joined: 4 Jul 2015
Age: 31
Posts: 23

25 Jul 2015, 3:01 pm

Is it like 'life but not alive' ?
I do feel the same



superpentil
Sea Gull
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Joined: 22 Sep 2014
Gender: Female
Posts: 203

25 Jul 2015, 3:57 pm

Owl City ftw.


_________________
"Sometimes I've believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast."

Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 175 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 37 of 200
You are very likely neurodiverse (Aspie)


Owl123
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

Joined: 9 Jul 2015
Age: 28
Posts: 146
Location: Philippines

26 Jul 2015, 4:07 am

olympiadis wrote:
[youtube]www.http://youtube/pCcmWWSnWtM[/youtube]

I can't get to the link. Could you please repost the video?

Owl123 wrote:
There are times when I get stuck on my bed, not wanting to get out of the house, not wanting to be seen by the world.

It's Embers by Owl City. Sorry for taking it long for me to reply



Owl123
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

Joined: 9 Jul 2015
Age: 28
Posts: 146
Location: Philippines

26 Jul 2015, 7:26 am

kraftiekortie wrote:
That's a nice song with a nice message.

I hope you take the message to heart, too.

You are a valuable person in the world. So what if you have "social deficits." If people want to hassle you because you have "social deficits," tell them to shove it where the sun don't shine!

You're going to be treating people who really need to be treated. Trust me, they don't care about "social deficits." All they care about is that you take away their pain.


Thanks so much @kraftiekortie
But I was also thinking that what if these social deficits should be the thing to be shoved out of them because I am causing them to feel bad or it could just probably mean that I need to improve myself. I do understand that at some point these awkwardness are just simply natural for me, but I was also thinking that I might be needing a therapy or a social skills training so I might as well do good to people someday. The thing which screws my brain out of its pain threshold is when I knew to myself that I needed to be diagnosed because I need to help myself. I am not yet diagnosed with ASD, and I am still planning to



kraftiekortie
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Posts: 87,510
Location: Queens, NYC

26 Jul 2015, 7:34 am

You want to know what I think?

I think you're feeling overwhelmed at the moment.

I've felt this way, and I've felt feelings similar to yours.

I wish I could be there in person to help you a little bit.

Are you on summer vacation now--or are you taking courses or Clinical?



olympiadis
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Joined: 20 Jun 2014
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Location: Fairview Heights Illinois

26 Jul 2015, 11:29 am