Using Autism as an excuse for rude/bad/unexpected behaviour?

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After my experience, autism provides bad behavior itself. Here a 3 traits of behavior of the majority of this website:

1. Can't take critiscism. 2. Aren't welcome to other people's opinions if they are not like their own. 3. Think it's a matter of fact of whether something is good or bad.

This pretty much means 3 things:

1. Pussyfication. 2. Anti-freedom of speech. 3. Idiocy.

Why are most autistics acting like this? Why? And before you start complaining about me being ''rascist'' against austistics, this is pretty much a matter of fact of how the majority of autistics i've met behave. And i also want to comply, i'm autistic myself.

I think it was more about the kid's lack of discipline that was the problem. Doesn't matter whether the kid has neurological issues or not the parent should have tried to regain some control. If a kid was kicking your possessions would you just take it?

I think in the examples the Op put down it's the parents that are making excuses because they think it's enough for people leaving them alone. The kids weren't having meltdowns and there was no reason to bring up autism at all.

In the case of the 13 year old autistic in the ladies toilets it might have been that they couldn't leave him unattended. People with autistic children often get offended by any little thing said to them and so I don't think what that lady said was offensive but some autistic people can't really be left on heir own. I been in public toilets and women would have their pre-teens with them. No indication they were autistic but I think it was more to do with timing. Or I dunno, they didn't want them to get abducted. It seemed kind of strange to me.

I've never used my autism as an excuse but people have hinted that I put too many limits on myself. I've been under enough distress that I had to tell people at a music venue that I was autistic. I now just wear a band around my wrist but otherwise I just keep it to myself. I'd rather not be seen as rude or anything else people think when they think my behaviour is odd.

You can't be racist against autistics.

I agree with most of what you said but you have used a bit more sensitivity. Those behaviour traits are related to the symptoms which are related to the differences in an autistic brain verse NTs. Of course NTs can be that way but it's more pronounced in autism.
I have many of those behavioural traits but they are more related to anxiety.

I don't think you can blame a person for unexpected behaviour. I know you didn't mention it but it's in the thread title. Would you blame a drunk for their behaviour? That's what an impulse control disorder is like. If someone acts a certain way and they know it's wrong (or their parents do) and the autism card is pulled out that's making an excuse, but impulsive behaviour or behaviour people have no idea whether it's appropriate or not, is not making excuses.

Just a reminder that personal attacks are against the rules, and yes, that does include attacking most of the membership at once.

Also, you cannot be racist against autistics because autism is not a race. Perhaps you meant "prejudiced against"?

Actually drunk people do get blamed for their behavior, someone does something when drunk and it's held against them and they are held accountable for their actions. That's the way it is in the USA, I don't know about your country.

Is it possible that your own perceptual filtering results in a skewed perception of the people on this site? I don't recognize your characterization in a lot of what I read here, but then I can only read a tiny fraction of the posts each day and my own interests mean there are some boards I never visit.

It seems to me the people of this community are highly diverse.

Fnord, Callista Verdandi, Goldfish21,Tallyman... Not exactly clones, it seems to me.

Thinking about the unique verbal styles, areas of interest and general tone of these and many other members of this site, I don't recognize the characteristics you assign to all as dominant or pervasive.



How long have you been reading posts here? What percentage of the posts do you read across the site? How many autistics have you met in real life? How many autistics have you met without recognizing their autism? Is it possible that when you meet people who don't fit your stereotyped preconception of autistics, you decide that they are NT and when you meet people who conform to your stereotype you assume they are autistic.

I strongly suspect that you have no rational grounds for drawing the sweeping generalization that you have made here. Perhaps thinking about this can give you insight into yourself. It probably won't help you as a way of understanding others.

i dont use autism as an excuse at all because im never intentionally rude, disrespectful or impolite, if someone tell me im being rude i apologize by saying "sorry! i forget sometimes"

Speaking of being rigid with thinking, I have noticed NTs do it too. Once they have formed an opinion about you, you cannot make them change it so it's impossible to impress them or prove them wrong because they will just overlook it and won't be good enough for them. People will only change their opinion about you if they want to. This is something I had noticed and figured out in my teens and I think it's human nature. For example, once someone thinks you're not a nice person, don't even try and prove them wrong or try and impress them with your niceness, it will not convince them and make them change their mind about you and then think "Oh I was wrong about this person, she is nice after all because after all she brought in some cookies to share with everyone. I had misjudged her."

I had this experience a lot in elementary school and online and then I experienced it from my uncle this past summer. He said to me "That doesn't count" when I said to him "What am I doing now? Am I using my computer right now, where is my son?" and he was on my lap and I was holding him and my uncle said "that doesn't count" when he was criticizing me about my parenting about being on the computer. That just proved my point about people forming an opinion about you and sticking with it and nothing is good enough for them. And people say we're black and white and rigid with our thinking? It's like good or bad they are doing about people.

Interesting theory. But it applies off the spectrum as well.



1. NPD's are notorious for not taking criticism well. Some Aspies are known to be sensitive to criticism as well, but are more capable of learning from it than arguing it to death.
2. People who may not like politically incorrect behaviour or opinions can fit into this mold.
3. I'll agree with idiocy. Some can be judgmental and are wrong with their judgments as well.

There's a difference between:

"Oops, sorry, I have autism and I didn't know that would annoy you. I'll put it on my ever-growing mental list of things to avoid doing. And if I really can't stop or if it's too useful to me, I'll at least try to find a compromise that you can live with, too."

And...

"You don't like what I just did? Tough cookies. I'm autistic and I can do what I want, and if you tell me I can't I'll just say you're being intolerant. I don't care whether I annoy you or embarrass you and I'm not going to change my behavior even when it hurts somebody else. Also, NTs suck."

have spent a lifetime with other autistic people,at home,in an institution,residential care,day centres and a learning disability A&T hospital- have only ever known one who uses her labels as an excuse,am currently an inpatient with her at the moment and she constantly abuses all of us with things she knows that hurt-physicaly and mentaly then rolls out her get out of jail free card about her disabilities,never takes responsibility.

personaly will never use any disabilities of mine as an excuse when have made mistakes or done something wrong, will never bring up labels,when we define and limit ourselves by our labels who is to tell NTs off for doing the same thing to us?
the OP is being OTT about the amount of autistics who do this as an excuse and clearly has not met a sizeable number of autists to make a informed judgement on,some of us have and from own experiences it is nothing at all like the OPs.

I agree completely. On another (NT) forum I'm on, there was a kid I knew who had AS and he was being really acerbic, and I knew that was cause of his AS - but I also felt he could have controlled himself better if he wanted and it seemed like he was playing that card. Like he has a license to be rude. The only time I will bring up my ASD is if it is the reason why I blundered on some rule - which has not happened yet and prob won't. No one else there with AS acts that way - so no excuse.

It is a reason for unexpected rude or bad behavior not an excuse. No apologies needed for some if not most unexpected behaviors. For rude behavior explanations are warranted most of the time, especially now that we know the explanations for them. "Bad" is a judgmental term but for things most would agree is "bad" such committing a crime at least apologies are needed.

Each incident and the circumstances surrounding them is different so the proper moral judgment on them is different.

Really, this the rudest comment I have ever read, you have probably not even met any autistic person over 6 years old. And seriously, there is almost no difference between an autistic 6 year old and a normal 6 year old. ReallyJustStop.

It did stop - almost 2 years ago. Don't know why you bumped this.

Is it rude or bad to scream, freak out, and cry hysterically when the bus I was on suddenly rear-ended the vehicle in front of it, causing an elderly lady who was just getting up to be knocked to the floor unconscious? I've only gone near a bus once or twice since then. Sometimes I scream my head off if I'm riding in a car and the driver unexpectedly slams on the brakes to avoid hitting someone, like my dad did when he and my mom were driving me home at night after celebrating his birthday. My dad actually cursed, not from the near-accident, but from my nearly cracking the windows with my voice.

I startle quite easily, and I believe it's the result of Asperger's or high anxiety. I'm not as bad as I used to be, though. Not so long ago the sound of some kid setting fire crackers would make me scream that terrorists were coming to kill us, and I'd scream or jump to the ceiling just from hearing the doorbell ring - even when I was expecting someone!

PS You are a troll.