Group home ?

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On some level , it seems like the only possibility I might have to ever have a bit of a place , with an ability to rest and recover from my conditions would be a group home , to be blunt , of some sort , even if I try to imagine some idealized boarding-school dormitory college , and to have at least access to a TV/DVD , a computer , etc. I sure don't have the money/connections now .
However , going in this late , with n background of having been in the " Aspie kid " community ~ and no family or possible visit-me friend near me AT ALL ~ I don't know . Places like that do tend to be mental hosital " commitment "-like , holding you , too , especially with my background .
And they'd likely suck away ost ll of my SSDI , essentially everything I have in life , and I would likely not be able to go out freely and have a social life , and have a schedule there , and a roommate and no privacy .

The group homes aren't all the same. Ask a lot of questions and try and talk to people who live there if you can. Good luck as always.

.This is a test post , I have been having C_____a problems , an earlier one was blocked ...What have we talked about before ?

...Okay , trying again...
My " beta " of this one suffered from a typing mistake on my part , hich may have reversed the meaning of it as perceived by a reader .
I meant , " with no background of being in the ' Aspie kid ' community " , that , without the widely held Aspie identity with the powers that be , I don't know that such a place would readily take me even if I otherwise would get in easily .
And I meant that , my mind tended to go to a more realistic idea of how a GH might be , even as I sort of imagine a idealized prep/boarding school dorm cottage type thing , " nice " - What , like a male Facts of Life ? I didn't even , generally , WATCH that friggin' show , it came on after my heyday watching-silly-TV-situation comedies days were behind me...
How would one " apply " to be " put away " , anyway ?
And how would you " go around and find out " ? And as for talking to the , um , " inmates " - Uh , clients - how could you be able to speak to them honestly and would they be allowed to speak in such a way ?
Especially as old as I am , I don't know how many places would accept me , anyhow ...........

...This shouldn't be in this this line , but it's F-'d up ~ I have little cash now (on Friday) and I will now HAVE to try some busking , for some hoped-for do$h/duckies , maybe food too...

Did you not get my PM regarding your high school transcripts? The high school needs an address on where to send them!

If I could get essential, household stuff, and maintain my niche interests, I would far rather be a hermit, most of the time, and not have any minders.

You're actually making sense.

A group-home sort of situation would be ideal for you.

I know somebody on WP who has been able to live in an apartment for people 55 or over. That has medical staff on call. Not "assisted living," really. But sort of.

If you have a social worker, maybe you can inquire into this.

It might be a long shot--but give it a shot.

Hi,

I live in the UK, so this might be different in the US although I suspect that the principles are still largely the same.

I think the freedom allowed to people living in a GH depends on the level of functioning of the individual. In the UK each person would have a care plan and if the care plan said that the person was safe and OK to socialise outside the home for a certain period then that would be fine. If the care plan said that the person was at risk when alone then going out socialising would be a different matter, they would have to be supported by a carer so that would limit when they can do that. Really the amount of freedom a person would have in a GH situation depends on their individual difficulties and strengths. Getting an accurate care-plan which is understood by those who run the home is really the key to this. In the UK people in GH situations are encouraged not only to go out shopping and to socialise but to try to work in supported employment situations too.

Most good GH's would certainly allow folk living there to talk freely with one big caveat: the people who run a GH are responsible for the welfare of their clients and they may not allow a complete stranger off the street to just come in and talk to them. This is not to hide anything but to protect the people living there from any harm.
However if someone was applying to live there and having a look round I would question how good the home is if the people there are prevented from talking to someone like that about their experiences.

The only problem over here with GHs is that if you have a relatively high level of functioning you would not be given a place in a GH. Because of a lack of funding and the global financial crisis on top, only those most in need of a GH situation are allocated one and even then, as far as I understand it, it's very difficult to get. So if a person is higher functioning they may not be considered as struggling enough to need a GH. It's not a great situation but it's the best that can be done with the limited funding available.

My advice would be:

(1) to find a list of GH's in your area or state and then read up on them via the internet. Find reviews and any official inspection reports (GHs in the UK are inspected regularly by the government to check they are doing what they should be doing.)

(2) contact the best ones and ask about the support they offer and the level of functioning of the people who they look after (and any other questions that you have about such a place). Then if the place seems to cater for people who have a similar level of functioning to yourself and you like the answers to your other questions, ask if you could come for a visit to find out more about it.

(3) On the visit you would normally be able to see the living sitiation for a person living there, meet and talk to the staff and meet and talk to some of the folk in the home.

You can do this for a few places until you either find one that seems right for you or you decide that a GH situation is not what you'd prefer.

Hope this helps,
Jo

Maan, I know 2 people who went into a group home. One chick nearly went crazy and tried to kill herself while the other one is totally subdued and can't even have friends outside the group home ... Both are people I grew up with in my youth and one of them was one of my best friends growing up. To know that they are like that to where they can't even have friends outside the group home is really ridiculous and sad. They also take all of her money, she only gets $50 spending money for a month to do what she wants with and I don't know about you guys but $50 is really not that much money to spent in this day and age.

As for the other one she was a close friend at a point but when I learned she had mental problems I kinda started distancing myself from her after she went off the deep end. I know that sounds terrible but I have problems of my own and I do not have the patience to deal with other people's mental problems. Plus this chick sent me a profanity filled email cursing me out for no reason ... Yea that's why I can't deal with people that have mental problems.

The group home idea sounds like it's worth looking into.
I wish you the best of luck!

If you can handle remembering to take meds on time and arrange your own way of getting to appointments you may want to look into a room and board. That way they take less of your check and you get more 'freedom' per se; a lot of them don't tolerate drinking/ drugs on the property and there's always the possibility they may have a daytime curfew which means you may have to leave the premises at 8 or 9 AM and can't come back until the afternoon.

Yes, that's the way it works. The group home takes your entire SSDI check. Then they provide you with your room, board, food and everything you need. You shouldn't really need anything else.

...DS and OG rather come up with compelling reasons for me not to try to go into a GH , to say this quickly .
OG , are you in one ? Are you able to follow your board which you advertise on your post if you are ? I suppose I doubt both . You are sanguine/" it's what happens , dude " about the possible negative results I hypothesised ~nd which DS described happening to her former freinds , even ones I suppose from/rooted in one particular place/with family !
For just one especially dramatic Reason Not To Go , it occurs to me that , after entrance to a GH I'd likely never be able to travel and see my brother (ret*d and in - Irony , etc. - a GH himself and I always have to initiate every contact with him , his place doesn't call me (though they're nice to me) and it's been 19 years coming up since I've physically met him - In a GH I'm sure that they'd never allow me a trip east to see him , really , even if I had the ca$h ~ So there's , just that there , keeping the possibility , anyway , that I can somehow travel to see him ~ and my parents' grave , and the place where I grew up , even once before I die ~ Keeping the possibility alive , anyway .

...I PM'd you back yesterday , Meis .

...It rather seems that that last comment of mine pretty much shut down the discussion and nobody had any real argument to make that a GH would let me make a trip to NYS to see (my brother) .