Scared of rised voice/yelling?

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I get scared every time my dad yells (or even rises his voice) at me. I feel like a wimp because i cant take harsh criticism from others. Right now i am feeling a bit sad cause my dad raised his voice at me and told me to stop having one of my special interests (headphones, and that it is "a ridiculous headphone fetish and it should stop". Any suggestions to be able to take criticism and/or negative comments about oneself? And if someone yells at me i usually start crying because i dont like it and i am scared. I feel bad about myself now but i will feel better soon, i know he was just in a bad mood and stressed, but it still does not feel so good.

I don't think anybody likes yelling.

I don't think you're a wimp. But it would be good if you could tell your dad to stop yelling all the time. Tell him you'll listen better if he talks to you calmly.

Tell him you are listening.

It's better if your dad explains to you why he feels this way, rather than trying to force you to listen to him. You're becoming a young lady, rather than a child.

If it is something that you really believe what you are doing is alright, then do not worry about the criticism. Just forget about their criticism. If you feel that the criticism that a person says is right, and can be constructive for you, just follow it, and do not worry about how they said it, since how they say it probably will not really help you change your ways. You might want to talk to him more on why you like headphones, so he understands where you are coming from, or something. It could open up conversation.

I think yelling is usually tyrannical, and it's often easy to be that way and get away with it if you're a parent or if you've got some other kind of power advantage over the victim.

I suppose I'm lucky to be an independent adult because I'm pretty much able to shut out anybody who doesn't treat me reasonably politely. I'm not particularly scared of yelling (though if the person doing it was bigger than me and in a position where they might get away with violence, I might be). I usually feel angry if somebody yells at me, and I feel motivated to show them that it won't get them anywhere with me. But I sometimes make allowances for people I have some feeling of friendship towards, if I suspect that they're going through a bad time, as long as it doesn't become a habit.

It's kind of ironic that you get yelled at for using headphones, which I suppose you use to help you screen out the external noises that bother you. Unless he was yelling while you had the headphones on because it was the only way he could get you to hear what he was saying. But it doesn't look like that was the reason.

I definitely start crying if people yell at me. I'm not really sure why. Just always have cried as soon as anyone raises their voice. Suppose I find it scary.

Do you find you can listen better if he doesn't yell?

Also sounds like you need to have a discussion (not an angry one) about your interest. He's seeing it as a fetish which is very different from a special interest. As far as I can tell it's that which is making him angry. If he understood better he might not be angry. I'm not sure though.

The main purpose of yell is to trigger fight or flight response so feeling scared is natural! That's how our bodies instinctively react. Yell means "danger". People either yell "Watch out!" when there is a danger or yell at people they want to intimidate the same ways as dogs growl at each other before a fight. In the second case yell means "I am about to attack you unless you show you are obedient!".

After hearing a yell your body will reacts emotionally, having 2 emotions to choose from: anger or fear ("fight or flight") which are actually a spectrum, you can be angry and scared at the same time. Because you are in a submissive position (you can't really "fight" your father) and naturally submissive person you feel fear. Personally I am more prone to feeling angry when someone yells at me now(and if the yelling won't stop I will sometimes yell back) but I was fearful when I was a kid.

Interesting link: http://www.counselorlink.com/yelling-as-a-pattern/

Besides - yelling is scary because of sensory issues. Sometimes when my dad gets into yelling tantrum I can't help but cover my ears because they literally hurt and I hear funny sounds in them (clicking). And then he yells even more despite me saying that I am covering my ears because the volume makes my ears hurt and I still hear what he is saying even with ears covered. But he still thinks me covering the ears is a gesture of "I am not listening to you", not hear defending.

My dad was the same way. I moved out asap. We get along better now, but when I was a kid he wasn't one for listening.

My mom, who likes to micro-manage everything about me and/or my sister, loves to yell whenever things do not go her way. She won't listen to either of us and accuses us of being the ones who yell.

Another reason why not to be at home. I fear it.

Being yelled at is intended to be an unpleasant experience.
Its a sign that the person has lost self control, a warning signal.
If you feel afraid, that is a normal healthy reaction.

Being yelled at, initially has a startle effect on me, I freeze up or disassociate. If it continues I cover my ears, I can't process anything rationally, or even start to think of how to respond to the situation when that level of noise is vibrating around in my auditory system.
In the past I have had experiences where the person yelling refuses to stop, or has followed me when I tried to get away from the noise, at that point I usually start yelling back, but so loudly that I drown out their sound; it leads to unpleasant experiences for me and it could take many hours to start feeling normal again.