Autism and borderline personality disorder

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Well, my BPD symptoms got better after medication, so the intense fear of abandonment faded a little bit, and mood swings too and dissociation. And I got over self harm.
That said....yeah I'm more stable now. The worst part of BPD for me is the attachment to specific people especially someone I love romantically, and fearing that they can abandon me (and if that fear lasts and I interpret things in a way that makes me think that person is tired of me then I freak out and have meltdowns - and autism doesn't help here, making me confused by people or giving me a hard time expressing myself). Regarding mood swings they can be bad too and the other really bad part is having strong, intense emotions but also flat emotions other times. It's all really confusing. Impulsive behavior? I'm not that impulsive, really, so I never had that trait.

So how does the combination of autism and BPD affect me? I don't know for sure, I talked to many people with BPD and they tend to have many friendships or constantly changing groups of friends and stuff so they have no social impairment or any other thing like that (social impairment is not part of the pure BPD experience), and since I do have social impairment I can't say I have unstable relationships because I don't even have many friends at all. So, it can be a funny combination. I also struggled a lot with black and white thinking (that now got better) and idealization/devaluation (that now got better).
Many people with BPD also drink or use drugs. I had tendencies like that, but stopped especially because I hated the social part of it or the possible social and personal consequences and then stopped being friends with certain bad people who made me try alcohol.

I used self harm as an attempt to stop my intense emotions (very typical in BPD), because I couldn't handle them.

I dislike people who consider BPD people manipulative or inherently evil. I never attempted to manipulate or intentionally hurt people, although suicide threats and stuff like that can be seen as manipulative. But they're really not, it's just screaming for help, really, at least in my case. I'm not saying I'm a totally innocent person, but I have my own inner struggles and all and don't really want to bother others.

Then, autism signs obviously manifested in childhood. BPD is a personality disorder so it develops during adolescence or early adulthood, and I developed it during adolescence, indeed. I've been bullied in my life and also been made fun of especially in elementary school, and it certainly affected me. BPD fevelops after some kind of trauma, and it manifested in me when I was 16 more or less.
But what are traumas in my life, really, if not life itself? School caused me traumas as a kid, hell, even preschool, as it was too much for me to handle and bullying didn't help.

Anyone else with both BPD and autism? How does the combination affect you?

In short, I am/was (depending on the trait) only affected by the personal part of BPD (black and white thinking, self-destruction and self-harm, intense emotions, shame, guilt, depression) but not so much by the social aspect because autism controls that part.

Oh, last thing....as I said my BPD got significantly weaker after meds and some talk therapy, and so did depression and bipolar disorder.
Autism, on the other hand....well, that can't be really fixed and honestly, I wouldn't want to. I'd stop being myself. I don't even consider autism a disorder or something inherently negative, especially high functioning autism.
I'd just say that since this world is designed for neurotypicals, then autism people find it hard to cope and here's how autism becomes bad...because living in a world that is not designed for us and our needs is bad and painful.

Mmmmmm..... I can relate to many of your emotions. Strong attachment to specific people, intense sometimes, flat other times, like I feel almost nothing at all. Also I have many similar traits to Autism/Aspergers. But I am undiagnosed, so to be fair, I won't say for sure if I have it on this board. Just that I have many traits that people with Autism and BPD have.

I don't take medication or anything, and as I've gotten older, I've learned to manage and keep my emotions at bay. So I'm able to live a relatively stable life. It's taken years of struggling, suffering against myself, and working hard with jobs, and learning how to work as a team, and related things. This along with my faith, and my close friends, have helped me become a functional human being. Though a somewhat eccentric and weird one.

I have also had struggles with suicidal thoughts and expressing my desire to die, and things like that. Never really got into self harm. I tried a few times in life, but stopped short of making myself bleed or show marks. I understand the pain and struggles you are going through. Your struggles do seem a bit more intense than mine, but I can still sympathize. And I'll keep you in prayer.

Keep on fighting, get good nutrition/water/sleep, and go out and try maybe a part time job (if you don't yet have one). Sometimes just having a job or something to do in society can be helpful. I've worked in fast food order taking, and that helped me gain good valuable social skills, and learning how to cater to other people's needs and so forth. I know it's not always pleasant, but if you find the right place with the right manager, it can really be helpful in the end.

You might fail sometimes, but you got to get back up when you do, and keep on trying. I'll be here if you ever need someone to talk to, or share and vent. That's what rob0ts are good for!

I don't know, just some thoughts.

Do take care!