Finding a balance between stress and avoidance

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I go through periods where I start to doubt my diagnosis. I try to push myself beyond my ability to cope because I convince myself that I'm exaggerating or fabricating my difficulties. This leads to unrealistic plans and expectations. When I can't follow through, I become depressed. How do I balance coping with pushing myself? I tend to swing between being limited by my diagnosis/condition or ignoring it entirely. I'd like to find a happy balance between the two extremes but I really struggle with this.

For me the only 'pushes' that work are TINY. If there is an activity that I do regularly, that I want to expand I choose ridiculously small ways to expand it...and give myself some time to recover in between attempts. I also try to repeat the changed activity a few times before adding another change.

It is a frustratingly slow process, but it is the only way that I have found to achieve lasting changes to the things I know I need to change. Good luck & keep positive as much as possible. Slow & steady will get us to the finish line...Eventually!

Good advice again. Thanks.

I have tried the sink or swim approach before (I'm quite impatient) but it usually does more harm than good.

I agree. I used to do the same thing & a big failure would set me back so much on all fronts. It was never worth having to claw my way out of the resulting depression.

Ridiculously small increments like Missanthrope said, has a lot to be said for it. If you think of dog training (or other animals), they teach the animal to do a complicated trick by pushing it in small steps towards the ultimate behavior. Comparing oneself to a lab rat or trained pigeon might seem silly or embarrassing, but you can be an active behaviorist on yourself and shape your behavior in small increments and it works just the same way. I know because I have done this on myself. Ultimately it works much better than shaming oneself for failure.

Another technique that might help you is behavior chaining. Add a new behavior to a routine you are already accustomed to. Eventually the new behavior flows according to your existing routine.