Is trying to fit in normal for young people on the spectrum?

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That I pushed myself beyond my limits, going out everyday, occasionally getting really drunk and smoking weed, being in this group of friends (three people) because I liked this one girl, and I tried to fit in....
But they used to make fun of me, you know....for being quiet, for being introverted, for my communication issues and delayed reactions. They used to make fun of me for being "weird". I used to sit in the back of the car, zoning out, staring out the window while they minded their own business talking. I also felt used by this girl I liked who used me and my money (and I'm not even rich). I was the quiet, weird and awkward member of the group. They all had other friends but I tried to stay away from many things, and I'm glad.
18-19 year old me was really naive. Now after this experience I kinda learned not to trust people.
I guess I just wanted to fit in and try to act like "them", or to act a bit neurotypical and even mimic them or follow some of the things they did or tell me to do, but of course I failed and I don't wanna try anything like that anymore. It ended up stressing me out and causing many psychiatric issues.

But has it ever happened to you, wanting to fit in or trying to be more social and ended up either failing or getting really stressed out?
Is it normal for young people on the spectrum to want to fit in at some point, especially teens?

Now I think in a different way. I accept my differences and have no interest to fit in or conform.

I think it's "normal" for both people on the Spectrum and neurotypical people.

It's a part of growing up.

Did exactly the same thing, at exactly the same age, with pretty much the same result.

The difference being that I'm still friends with the girl that I followed around and allowed (practically begged) to use me. It's kind of hard to get rid of them when they're your first cousin and have a kid born within 48 hours of your kid, LOL.

I learned something. She actually respected me a lot more for being myself, and NOT trying to fit in with all that s**t.

Baffles the hell out of me. I got mocked and belittled mercilessly for being quiet, having a lag in responding to conversation, staring out the window while they yammered on and on and on...

Then I find out that, 15-20 years later, they actually RESPECTED me for being myself instead of trying to fit in and like me just the way I am (as opposed to the way I was trying to be).

*headscratch*

Yeah, I give up on "trying to be liked." Screw it. This is me, like it or piss off and let me spend my limited free time with people who do.

i cant fit .Because the differences are very clear

Trying to fit in seems a normal part of the human condition. Some people are simple more or less adept at fitting in than others.

I know I sometimes tried to 'fit in' or at least make friends or at least wanted to be accepted. Ostracism and bullying really does suck so of course I didn't like being the weirdo no one liked. I have certainly tried 'putting myself out there' to try and push myself to just learn more how to interact that way...and yes some of those attempts have backfired and I feel I have been used by others. Anymore though I more or less know who I am and what I like and am interested in so I find it more fulfilling to just interact with people that accept that....rather than spending a bunch of energy trying to fake 'normal' so I can associate with yuppies and squares who are no fun anyways.

I never tried to fit in but I have disabilities other than my Aspergers & was bullied alot when I was a kid so I mostly wanted to be left alone to do my own thing in my teen years.

I'm kinda lucky in the sense that a few of my friends actually have Asperger's or mild Asperger's. I can generally blend in pretty well, or even sometimes exhibit extroverted traits among friends, but if I'm surrounded by strangers instead, I stick out like a sore thumb. A very socially awkward sore thumb.

I agree that this is a common thing even among NT children, and typical children will often "try on" different personalities as they grow up, copying friends or something they've read or seen.

It is generally harder for kids OTS, though, in my opinion, and rather than simply being a phase, a game and/or experimentation, it's often a more panicked thing...be normal "or else"...so that negative element is added.

I went to a graduation dinner yesterday, and I was the center of the jokes there at the friends table for being very quiet and for not being able to just act like everybody else. It was kinda humiliating, even if they're friends of mine.
I didn't try to fit in, I went because I didn't want to disrespect my friends who invited me and payed for our dinner, including mine, so I went there and acted like myself: quiet, introverted, socially awkward and lost, lost when it comes to being social, not knowing what to do exactly, unlike everybody else. I've always been made fun of for being so quiet and for speaking slowly sometimes, or not speaking at all other times.

So, I just found out that even if I try acting normal, I never act normal and always stand out in the group as the weird and quiet one. This just made me stop trying to "fit in".
I can be more extroverted with only two friends of mine who totally accept me.

I've been used a lot, yeah, and been made fun of. It always happens, because my differences are too evident. Some people even make fun of my facial expression, probably because I space out a lot in social situations and look lost somewhere.

I've never tried to fit in until very recently and I'm 22. Only because I have to learn what to do and say to get ahead in work and such and to be respected. I didn't know it was actually important till I was diagnosed and got told that. I'm not a complete sheep though.