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Getting framed

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DevilKisses
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30 Nov 2015, 7:40 pm

I've been thinking about my gender-related threads. I don't think it's just a gender issue. The underlying issue is being framed. Gender is something that people get framed with often, but the same thing can happen because of disability, age or physical appearance.

When me and my sister were kids we both loved to spin on chairs. When I spun on chairs it was framed as an autistic behavior. That meant I got scolded for it. When my sister spun on chairs it got framed as a kid playing. Since it's not as socially acceptable to punish kids for playing no one cared if she spun on chairs.


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kraftiekortie
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30 Nov 2015, 7:44 pm

This is why you should transcend your diagnosis and your "disorder"--so you don't get "framed."

You're almost 20 (if you're not 20 already). You like women (mostly). It's your business, since you're not harming anybody. Don't allow yourself to be "framed."

Get your optician certificate so you don't have to depend on your parents any more. That would help, too.



DevilKisses
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30 Nov 2015, 7:54 pm

kraftiekortie wrote:
This is why you should transcend your diagnosis and your "disorder"--so you don't get "framed."

You're almost 20 (if you're not 20 already). You like women (mostly). It's your business, since you're not harming anybody. Don't allow yourself to be "framed."

Get your optician certificate so you don't have to depend on your parents any more. That would help, too.

I simply like to omit things that can frame me unless I want to be framed with them. On certain websites I don't want to be framed as female, so I on it my gender. On some websites I don't want to be framed by my appearance so I don't show my picture. In real life I want to be framed by blue hair, so I have blue hair.


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Earthling
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30 Nov 2015, 8:02 pm

Me too. I don't just show my face to people because I know they will respect me less if they have seen it.



kazanscube
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30 Nov 2015, 8:19 pm

Honestly you should not let people frame or as I like to call it "pigeonhole" someone for its easily done. I'll admit that often I have been pigeonholed due to my writing style which to some people must indicate a child must be behind the postings.

In fact such notions of this are not true at all but, trying to prove such always presents the problem. My advice simply express yourself regardless of what others think of you.


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DevilKisses
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01 Dec 2015, 1:32 pm

kazanscube wrote:
Honestly you should not let people frame or as I like to call it "pigeonhole" someone for its easily done. I'll admit that often I have been pigeonholed due to my writing style which to some people must indicate a child must be behind the postings.

In fact such notions of this are not true at all but, trying to prove such always presents the problem. My advice simply express yourself regardless of what others think of you.

It's not that simple. The way people frame me really affects the way things go. It's not that simple to stop caring what people think.


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Varelse
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01 Dec 2015, 1:39 pm

DevilKisses wrote:
I've been thinking about my gender-related threads. I don't think it's just a gender issue. The underlying issue is being framed. Gender is something that people get framed with often, but the same thing can happen because of disability, age or physical appearance.

When me and my sister were kids we both loved to spin on chairs. When I spun on chairs it was framed as an autistic behavior. That meant I got scolded for it. When my sister spun on chairs it got framed as a kid playing. Since it's not as socially acceptable to punish kids for playing no one cared if she spun on chairs.


This is sound cognitive psychology. Wray Herbert, Cordelia Fine, and Carol Tavris (among others) would all agree with you on this one.



InsomniaGrl
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01 Dec 2015, 1:58 pm

DevilKisses wrote:
I've been thinking about my gender-related threads. I don't think it's just a gender issue. The underlying issue is being framed. Gender is something that people get framed with often, but the same thing can happen because of disability, age or physical appearance.

When me and my sister were kids we both loved to spin on chairs. When I spun on chairs it was framed as an autistic behaviour. That meant I got scolded for it. When my sister spun on chairs it got framed as a kid playing. Since it's not as socially acceptable to punish kids for playing no one cared if she spun on chairs.


A lot of threads on here are about how a particular type of behaviour could be considered autistic or not, even things which seem kinda random. Its a good opportunity to consider what might and might not be ASD traits. Sometimes though amongst 'ourselves' on WP we frame things which would just be considered pretty normal behaviour as an NT.


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kazanscube
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01 Dec 2015, 2:29 pm

Never said it would be easy, no in fact it's quite difficult even for myself.


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Savegraduation
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01 Dec 2015, 5:57 pm

Thank you for posting this, DevilKisses.

An excellent example of what you call framing is in the article about a girl named Betty Marie here: http://www.usautism.org/USAAA_Newslette ... 111207.htm

As a characterization of her Asperger's, it says: "Betty Marie would like to one day marry Justin Timberlake." Doesn't that sound like a very neurotypical teen girl? It does to me.

And earlier the article says: "And she holds grudges." Holding grudges is a normal part of human nature.

So how are these symptomatic of Asperger's?



DevilKisses
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02 Dec 2015, 7:09 pm

Savegraduation wrote:
Thank you for posting this, DevilKisses.

An excellent example of what you call framing is in the article about a girl named Betty Marie here: http://www.usautism.org/USAAA_Newslette ... 111207.htm

As a characterization of her Asperger's, it says: "Betty Marie would like to one day marry Justin Timberlake." Doesn't that sound like a very neurotypical teen girl? It does to me.

And earlier the article says: "And she holds grudges." Holding grudges is a normal part of human nature.

So how are these symptomatic of Asperger's?

I agree. I read that article and some things were Asperger traits, but a lot weren't.


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Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 82 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 124 of 200
You are very likely neurotypical