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C2V
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05 Feb 2016, 9:39 am

As autistics can be readily misinterpreted by outside observers, it always interests me how I come across and how people see me. It is often very different to how I feel I am presenting.
Someone I met tonight and actually had a long and interesting discussion on mythology, psychology, and spirituality among other mutually relevant topics described me as "placid and engaging." I looked that definition up - placid -
pleasantly calm or peaceful; unruffled; tranquil; serenely quiet or undisturbed."
This is pretty much uniformly how I am perceived by others, to varying extremes - "zen," "calm," or less kindly, "disinterested," or "remote."
Which is odd as I always feel as if I come across too energetically. Too sporadically, all ungraceful and uncoordinated. But apparently to outside observers, I'm actually smooth.
How do people describe you? Does it differ from how you feel you present?


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Ashariel
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05 Feb 2016, 9:55 am

That is really interesting. I wouldn't guess 'placid' from your written posts. Engaging, definitely, but the 'placid' bit does not come across unless someone sees your body language and facial expression.

I've noticed a difference in that people online tend to think I'm much more outspoken than I am in real life. But in real life I am super quiet, shy, timid, have trouble talking at all. 'Nice but shy' is how my classmates used to describe me in school.



BeaArthur
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05 Feb 2016, 9:56 am

Smart ... sometimes too direct.

I'll own that.


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kraftiekortie
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05 Feb 2016, 10:07 am

People tend to think I'm nice--but a little crazy, crazy enough for one to be a little skeptical of me.

Truthfully, once people know me, they tend to like me better than when they first meet me. When people first meet me, they don't quite trust me.



traven
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05 Feb 2016, 10:14 am

Calm, silent water, organised, always working, phlegmatic,
or arrogant, needs to be thought a lesson, stupid, not polite.



hmk66
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05 Feb 2016, 10:24 am

Interesting...

I am often describe as intelligent, friendly, socialized, funny humor, good listener, good social and communicative skills, good-looking, having funny interests, very attractive to women (looks and behaviour), clean (well-dressed, not having a body odour). By others: slightly mental retardation, poor executive functions, lack of empathy and theory of mind, insecure, unattractive, naive.

Some of the traits are unusual in case of someone with autism.



VegetableMan
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05 Feb 2016, 10:35 am

Most people think I'm a kind, friendly person, but with weird sense of humor that can be very hard to get used to. A new friend recently told me she found me a bit "standoffish."


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arielhawksquill
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05 Feb 2016, 11:28 am

C2V wrote:
pleasantly calm or peaceful; unruffled; tranquil; serenely quiet or undisturbed."
This is pretty much uniformly how I am perceived by others, to varying extremes - "zen," "calm," or less kindly, "disinterested," or "remote."


All of those observations might be based on the fact that your facial expression doesn't change much--people on the spectrum tend to wear their neutral resting face a lot more than neurotypicals do.



Trogluddite
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05 Feb 2016, 11:41 am

A word that I have really come to despise - "Quirky".


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kraftiekortie
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05 Feb 2016, 11:43 am

I'm quirky, and I'm proud of it.

I just realized the origin of your screen name: a combination of Troglodyte and Luddite.

Nothing wrong with being quirky--as long as you don't actively bother anybody.



TheAP
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05 Feb 2016, 11:48 am

People have described me as smart, insightful, nice, quiet, serious. But I worry that people also see me as a freak, boring or a whiner.



Trogluddite
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05 Feb 2016, 1:21 pm

Thanks, kraftie.
I think the trouble is that I've too often heard "quirky" used in a dismissive context just recently - as in "Nah, you're not autistic, just a bit quirky (always the "just" for some reason, too). I can certainly agree with your sentiment, but I find it difficult to take pride in a concept that I so rarely hear used in an affirmative sense. Maybe that will change as I get used to my diagnosis - I can see that maybe I'm being a bit 'prickly' over a silly little word, possibly trying a little too hard, and too quickly, to get the NT people in my life to understand.


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Rocket123
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06 Feb 2016, 12:15 am

At work, people regularly mention that I am very detail oriented. While I am not 100% certain, I believe they are trying to compliment me.



DailyPoutine1
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06 Feb 2016, 12:45 am

Stuck-up nerd, smartass. Others think I take drugs.



DevilKisses
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06 Feb 2016, 12:47 am

Rocket123 wrote:
At work, people regularly mention that I am very detail oriented. While I am not 100% certain, I believe they are trying to compliment me.

I don't even know what detail oriented is supposed to mean. I've been described like that before, but I'm not sure I am. What I do know is that I'm a huge perfectionist. That could be seen as detail oriented to some people.


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Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 124 of 200
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DevilKisses
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06 Feb 2016, 12:51 am

Smart, stupid, can't multi-task, dreamer, detail oriented, OCDish, perfectionist, intense, blunt, funny, articulate, artsy, geek, weird, autistic, not autistic, bipolar, depressed, anxious, quiet, loud and a whole bunch of other contradictions.


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Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 82 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 124 of 200
You are very likely neurotypical