Aspie and NT Friendships
Do Aspies struggle with NT friendships? Do they find their NT counterpart to be unpredictable?
I've got a few "friends" that I struggle with. One day, they're (or at least I perceive them to be) really intense, talkative, chatty, they make time for me, listen to me, help me, support me. I find it easy to build a bond with them.
But the next day, they don't talk to me, they don't reply to the email I sent. I even had two of my friends talk about me to each other (in a good way) but not one of them told me anything about the recommendation that they were going to tell me until they saw me face to face. They don't give any hint that they want to talk to me, they don't initiate. Im left wondering if I've done something, said something, crossed a line somehow. Should I ask? No that would be worse. I would come across as neurotic. Clingy.
Im not like this with everybody, just a few people. Im more intense and clingy in some relationships than I am with others.
I have realised I may be catastrophising here, Im blaming others for doing the same thing I do. Im getting jealous that I can't have the same kind of interaction with my "friend" as the others have. Im thinking the worst that they're fake. I want revenge. Im going to treat them how they treat me! Im going to cut them out of my life, Im not going to respond. How can they do this to me? What about discussing the email? Why didn't they invite me to talk to them? I sense the anger, the frustration. I'll let the resentment building because it's better to blame others than it is to blame me.
I got them a present a few days ago - just a small token - a small token which I feel I have to over analyse and over explain to neutralise any threat that this might come across as creepy and hitting on my friend. I don't want to do that. Now I don't want to give them this present.
Could I be sexualising this interaction?
I listen to how other people talk, they will talk about her uncovered legs. I won't. I wouldn't talk about a womans legs. I wouldn't talk about a mans legs. Why not? It seems to be normal conversation.
Why is my conversation so much more limited?
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