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aja675
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30 Mar 2016, 10:26 am

...But what if your real self is undesirable, such as if you easily get angry? I mean, if we were all being 100% ourselves and we acted out on every thought, we would end up acting on every negative thought as a result, and that can't be good. If we all acted out on every angry thought, the resulting body count would be huge.



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30 Mar 2016, 12:18 pm

aja675 wrote:
...But what if your real self is undesirable, such as if you easily get angry? I mean, if we were all being 100% ourselves and we acted out on every thought, we would end up acting on every negative thought as a result, and that can't be good. If we all acted out on every angry thought, the resulting body count would be huge.



I think the term 'just be yourself' is a wishy washy platitude with no real meaning. We all have that part of us that we need to keep hidden and under control and everyone's public face is partly an act.

Perhaps it's supposed to mean, have more confidence in yourself and don't be afraid to express it when appropriate :)


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CockneyRebel
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30 Mar 2016, 12:25 pm

My mum told me to be myself, so I bought a German helmet and painted it blue. I'm not going to show it to her, because I know she'll kill me if she sees it.


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30 Mar 2016, 12:30 pm

There is no such thing as being yourself, you can be whatever you want to be. I could probably be a narcissist if I wanted to be.


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JimSpark
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30 Mar 2016, 12:48 pm

"Be yourself" is one of the least useful expressions I've ever heard.

League_Girl wrote:
There is no such thing as being yourself, you can be whatever you want to be. I could probably be a narcissist if I wanted to be.


I agree. My definition of and perception of "myself" changes daily. I am different today than I was last week, and I will be different tomorrow in some other ways. Some of it good, some of it bad -- some of it intentional, some of it unconscious -- but our personalities change little by little each day until we're dead.

There is no constant and easily-definable "myself." But I could be over-thinking things again :wink:


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Brittniejoy1983
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30 Mar 2016, 2:01 pm

I agree with "Be Yourself" being a completely useless and inapplicable platitude.

Especially when you are raised told to 'not be yourself', followed by 'Just be yourself!'. It doesn't make sense.


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Joe90
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30 Mar 2016, 2:10 pm

What it means is if you're a shy/socially anxious person (AS or not), don't try to be something you're not. Show the other people that you're a shy person.
At the same time, you have to still make a little effort. So be your shy self, but show that you're friendly and positive too. Smile, make eye contact, and speak little and often. Don't overdo it, otherwise you will end up saying the wrong things and people start to judge you. So just be casual. Try to relax. Don't be ashamed of being shy. Just train yourself to be friendly in a shy way, so that people will know that you're just shy, instead of mistaking you for unfriendly or weird or snobby, etc.

I know it's easier said than done. But that is what people mean when they say be yourself.


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30 Mar 2016, 2:23 pm

Joe90 wrote:
What it means is if you're a shy/socially anxious person (AS or not), don't try to be something you're not. Show the other people that you're a shy person.
At the same time, you have to still make a little effort. So be your shy self, but show that you're friendly and positive too. Smile, make eye contact, and speak little and often. Don't overdo it, otherwise you will end up saying the wrong things and people start to judge you. So just be casual. Try to relax. Don't be ashamed of being shy. Just train yourself to be friendly in a shy way, so that people will know that you're just shy, instead of mistaking you for unfriendly or weird or snobby, etc.

I know it's easier said than done. But that is what people mean when they say be yourself.


I think you're on to the right idea. I would understand "be yourself" to mean (at least implicitly), "be your best self." My best self isn't rude, angry, selfish, etc. We all have those negative traits to some degree. Rather, the idea is that we shouldn't try to pretend to be someone that we're not. Be you, but don't seek to be the worst you possible! :)